Quote:
Originally Posted by Ainz Ooal Gown
Athena frowned at her brother, laying down in front of her. This whole walk she wanted to say something, but she did not want to hurt his feelings, at least up until now. She thought that maybe he would open up to how he truly felt, but he kept masking it. His fatigue, his pain. It hurt her. It angered her. Finally, standing on the soft sand of the beach, she had decided that she had to say it. And be brutally honest. "Czar." She started and paused, thinking about what she was actually going to say. "This is nowhere near the old times. Do you understand that you were so careless and wild back then. Now look at you. You look so stiff and so careful, like any wrong move will hurt you." Her tone was soft, and easygoing at first, but now, it was starting to shift into more anger. Anger at who, she didn't know. But she was starting to get ticked. "You say you're concerned about how I feel. Well you don't because how do you think I feel when I see you like this? Like a pathetic lump of fur!" She didn't want to say it, but she felt the need to get her feelings out. "This walk did nothing for me but make me realize how pathetic you have actually become! I want to help you Czar, I really do! You're my brother and I want to do anything I possibly could do to help you! But I can't when you won't get up and help yourself!" She was full on yelling now, and she could not hold back the tears that came with her voice. "You're sad. I get it! But you weren't this sad when Shadow vanished and we thought he was gone! But NOW it's a big deal and you're so depressed! You can't even eat, barely stand, and give nothing but this dreadful stench of sadness! If you really cared, you would at least TRY! I hate you when you're like this!"
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Czar just stared at his sister, a whirlwind of emotions arose within him growing stronger and stronger the more she spoke. His final straw was when she mentioned Shadow. “You don’t know what I went through to make sure you were ok!” He screamed, his own tears rolling down his face as his ears pinned to his head. His whole body was shaking at this point, but not out of weakness- rather, out of the multitude of emotions battling inside him. This was the first time in…since, ever- that he had properly addressed them.
Anger and sadness bit and clawed through one another for the crown which was his main emotion. Alas, both were equally as strong. “You don’t know…” He hiccuped, stifling a sob. “What I saw mother go through when dad disappeared. What I saw when he came back. The anger, the sorrow, the guilt. You didn’t see how she felt with Klaus! She felt like she needed someone to feel whole! You never saw her crying over him! She never ran to you to vent! I had to keep up with her, to make sure she was ok, and to make sure you barely saw anything!” He cried.
“You don’t know!” His voice broke. “You don’t know…” He wiped his tears with his paws. “I caught mom. I caught her wanting to leave us. She said she wanted to join dad.” He shook. “I had to help her through that before going to play with you. I thought,” His voice wavered. “I thought maybe with the pups she’d be better. But Athena I’ve never seen her worse. Why do you think no one’s allowed to see her? She’s half dead! Worse than me!” He screamed. “How dare you call me pathetic! After everything I’ve tried to do! It just never works! Nothing I do works!” The apprentice screeched into the air, holding himself in his arms.
“I deserve…a break…” He hummed, no longer able to look her in the eyes. “I wish I can be like you. Completely unaffected. You never wanted those siblings in the first place. You never saw what mom went through. What she is going through. You don’t see how dad is barely talking to her.” He shook his head. “You have no right to call me pathetic. I’ve gone through so much I might as well be named a warrior now.” He stood up. “Seeing what I have takes a toll on you Athena. I wanted this to bring us closer together. But I guess it’s done the opposite.”