[Gone]

Originally Posted by RosePelt145

Amberpaw quietly listened to Mudspeck's words, her back still to him , and she glanced up at him once he was finished. "I... I'm sorry, Mudspeck, I didn't mean..." her eyes filled with sympathetic tears. "Oh... oh, I... I didn't mean that, Mudspeck. I just..." she glanced away. "I don't want you to be angry at me... I've wanted to be just like you for so long. Your words just made me wish that more. I want to be like you." she gazed at him, her eyes earnest. "You're strong, brave, skilled ... I wish to be that way someday..." she glanced away again. "You... you're right, my mom wouldn't want me to give up. I just don't know much outside of death and fear and blood... I've never known kindness and care and warmth." she looked up at her mentor. "But, you're showing me all those things , and I'm grateful..." she gazed down at her paws. "As for forgetting my past, I don't think it'll be easy, but I'll try... just remember I am very anxious alot of the time. Please be careful and remember that. I'm sure you wouldn't want me to have a fit in the middle of training..." she said these last words in a weak attempt at humor. "Please don't be angry with me, Mudspeck. I look up to you so much!" she gave him a sweet smile , then gazed out over the Clearing. "When it was time for my father's execution, I watched with a horrifying feeling in my paws... I wanted to be the one killing him . I wanted to be the one to bring him to justice, after what he did. Is that wrong? To want to kill your own father?" she shook her head. "I'm not trying to make you angry again... I just want to know. You don't have to answer, though, if you don't want. Not if you think I'm revolving everything around me again." she sighed. "Never mind , let's just take the tour around the territory. I'm getting restless." she stood on her paws, padding delicately towards the camp entrance and slipping through without so much as a glance in his direction . She waited for him on the other side, gazing around , eyes wide with wonder. "Wow!" she breathed as she took in the beauty of Leaf Fall for the first time in moons.

Mudspeck listened to her apology and tensed a little as she said that she wanted to be like him even more and as she spoke about how she didn't know anything else other than death, fear and blood, he decided to speak. "You'll have to understand that the clan life revolves around those three words..." The tom mewed he was certainly touched by how she praised him, he was always there for her, trying to show her the right way. "But leaving your past behind will be the only way to be like this, I've done it, so if you want to become like me, it means you can as well." He added and kept on listening, there are many people he had wanted to kill, but his mother had been on top of the list. They didn't let you kill him for a reason, you don't know how to kill a cat..." He mewed and watched her get up before he started following her towards the entrance to camp. "Fine, but stay close, this isn't the time to go running around, you could slip on a spot of ice and end up in a tree if you aren't on your guards." Mudspeck mewed and slipped through the entrance as well.

(Wanna post on the territory?)