[lio]

[ @Rubinaito ]
[ yess ]

as if without thinking, carter spoke. "you'd look rather dashing in fanciful clothing, however." only moments later, he realized what he had said, cheeks set ablaze with a firey tint of red. his eyes had widened and he immediately turned away to mentally scold himself, then smiled and pretended that it had never been said.
gosh, what an idiot i am. rubbing the bridge of his nose, carter pulled up the hood of his cloak and pulled the long, staff-like stick from a holster on his back. he always carried this thing around as it helped him to train, focusing on his spells and not getting distracted, as he did so easily. the object also proved to be a great weapon again the Noir, as it was sturdy, easy to swing, and very simple. just how carter liked it.

he blinked slowly, looking up towards alexander. the touch of their hands sent tingles shooting up his arm, travelling in a swirl to his mind and fogging it of all sense of logic. for those few seconds that they stood their, carter had prepared himself for a kiss. he had allowed his mental barrier to crumble to the ground, and truly had wanted to lean in and meet his lips to alexander's. such a foolish boy, an inner darkness purred, you shall think that he may want you. but he shall want a woman to marry, to bear his children for the kingdom to thrive. you are merely a simpleton working towards finding something that does not exist. he doesn't care about you. his breathing became heavier as he shook his head violently, holding it as the voice spoke. "stop it," carter whispered, closing his eyes.

just as quickly as it began, it stopped and he was able to set forth once again. "onwards!" carter laughed, though it seemed strained. his stance, albeit relaxed, showed that he didn't want to speak of what he had just went through. for years, those thoughts had seeped into his mind, bringing him down below a screaming lake of black water. he had tried to fight them off, but it wasn't as easy as battling a Noir. no, it was far more difficult. almost impossible, even. biting his lip, carter exhaled a slow breath before stepping forwards with an arm raised in the air. "to the great beyond!" he smiled at alexander, a hidden glint in his gaze.

the darkness was creeping in.

[ i'll explain this in vm ]