[Clover]

Originally Posted by woly

As Geckoleaf wrapped her tail around them and rested her head along their neck, they stiffened. It was still new to receive affection from anyone. They had never been groomed by another cat before, much less cuddled. After a moment they softened, letting their body relax under the mollies touch, mind processing that she wasnt hurting them, merely showing motherly affection. They stayed silent, amber hues gazing at the pushed fish. It had little nibbles on it, but not much. It was huge, more then triple Daypaws weight in estimate. They briefly wondered why she had pushed it away. Instead of asking, they merely rested their head ontop of their mother, giving a small hum signalling they had heard her.

They thought back to what Juniperpaw had said, though. Daypaw didnt expect things to go back to normal over night, they didnt expect Geckoleaf to be exstatic about taking on another apprentice. They could, somewhat, understand. Daypaw lack empathy, thinking with their head instead of their heart. Not that thinking emotionally was a bad thing, Daypaw had a more blunt and darker view of the world then most. They missed Cricketpaw dearly, they would rather Starclan take their life over hers. But they knew how the world worked. They knew they could not save every cat in the world, no mater how much Daypaw stressed, no matter how little they cared for themselves in order to get to every single cats needs before their own. No matter how much they didnt want to accept it, they knew cats died. They knew cats died and the world moved on. Queens would have kits, the leaders would go on to gatherings, apprentices would train with their mentors, warrior would be made, and soon enough, those cats that had passed away so long ago would be forgotten. Daypaw had accepted it, Daypaw would die just like everyone else and a someone new would take over, and they would be forgotten. They were nothing but a phase in the circle of life, just like everyone else. It was dark, but thats how Daypaw saw the world.

They removed their head from Geckoleafs, gaze resting on her. It was stern, though with hints of rare softness in them. As cold as their thoughts were on the world, they could understand where geckoleaf was coming from. She was hurting. Everyone was, everyone handled things differently. But they couldnt help go back to what Juniper said, her loneliness she felt when Gecko had given her a somewhat cold shoulder. Daypaw may didnt have a proper mentor, but they understood that mentors and apprentices have a very close relationship. Juniperpaw was not Cricketpaws replacement, she was much more then a runner up for their friend. She was a cat, just like them with feelings and emotions. And while Daypaw could understand why Gecko and Russet would treat her differently, it angered them at the same time. They had a blunt mouth and a sharp tongue, and wouldnt hesitate when bringing up something that bothered them, even if it hurt.

¨Can I talk to you about something?¨

Geckoleaf, up until that point, had been gently grooming the unkempt pelt of the enby, working through tangles, pulling out, although softly, briars and twigs that managed to stick in the golden fur. For a moment, she admired the golden fur of her child; it seemed to glow softly, with the sun refracting through each yellow hair. A smile flickered across her face, but was buried under a small swell of the all-too-familiar grief; Daypaw was so like Cricketpaw, almost like a second Cricketpaw. But in another second, she reminded herself, sharply, that Daypaw was their own self; they were entirely different from Cricketpaw, and had their own quirks and issues. And, besides that, they were alive. With a sharp swallow, she stopped grooming the enby, instead of relaxing her head against their neck.

At their question, she perked her ears, slightly, but didn't move her head. Daypaw's voice carried a certain edge to it, though they couldn't pin point what certain quality it carried. "Daypaw, you can ask me anything, and I will answer as well as I can,"she replied, calmly, her blue eyes slowly closing as she waited for the answer of the golden cat.