SkyClan Territory

[lone]

Originally Posted by RedHead

Gingerblossom turned as she heard a voice behind her. Her face brightened at seeing a ginger tom there. Ooo yay! Someone I can talk to! The warrior wasn't at all bothered by the fact that her alone time had been interrupted. In fact, she was quite glad, as she would rather be talking to someone than spending time alone anyways. She looked at her flower at his paws, slightly crumpled, but still beautiful. She dropped down to the branch the tom was on, then gently walked across it to pick up the flower. "Isn't it just beautiful?" She asked him, more of a rhetorical question than genuine though,

as she continued on talking. "Today's a yellow flower kind of day, so that's why I have a yellow flower today!" She purred as she placed the flower back in her fur, securing the stem more tightly this time. "Thanks for bringing it back up the tree! I wasn't too lazy to fetch it, I just knew there were other flowers!"

A bright smile spread across her face, her mint colored eyes sparkling with her their normal sparkle. 'What's your name again? I've seen you around, I just can't remember. I'm a little forgetful sometimes." Gingerblossom's voice was still light and cheerful, no resent or discouragement there at all.

A yellow flower kind of day? The way she had described that made the tom purr. That sounded interesting. But, interesting cats were the type that made life worth it to Blazingcomet. After all-- as much as he hated to admit it, he depended on other cats as he might oxygen or something else. He depended on them. It was an irritating conclusion, but one that the tom had come to time and time again. She was so cheerful! "You're quite welcome. Anything for a pretty girl." He mewed, a smile firmly on his maw. As he had imagined, the flower looked quite nice in the she cat's fur. It seemed to belong there, like the clouds in the sky or the birds in the trees. Well, in that case he was quite glad he had fetched the flower for her. "I do have to say, with that flower you're just about as pretty as it gets." A light chuckle emitted from the tom's maw. At her next question, the tom paused for a moment. In his haste, he realized he had neglected to remember her name. This was a key point; if he got it right, chances were she would be more open to him. Wrong? Well, some cats were quite picky about their names. "It's Blazingcomet," He told her. Thinking for a moment, he decided it would be better to ask and have it imprinted into his mind then try and guess and run the risk of getting it wrong. "Sorry. I'm not very good with names either, heh... I can't seem to remember yours." He laughed, a little embarassed but trying to play it off as though it were light. Nothing at all. Hopefully, she wouldn't be too annoyed.

[RedHead]

Originally Posted by Lonestar23

A yellow flower kind of day? The way she had described that made the tom purr. That sounded interesting. But, interesting cats were the type that made life worth it to Blazingcomet. After all-- as much as he hated to admit it, he depended on other cats as he might oxygen or something else. He depended on them. It was an irritating conclusion, but one that the tom had come to time and time again. She was so cheerful! "You're quite welcome. Anything for a pretty girl." He mewed, a smile firmly on his maw. As he had imagined, the flower looked quite nice in the she cat's fur. It seemed to belong there, like the clouds in the sky or the birds in the trees. Well, in that case he was quite glad he had fetched the flower for her. "I do have to say, with that flower you're just about as pretty as it gets." A light chuckle emitted from the tom's maw. At her next question, the tom paused for a moment. In his haste, he realized he had neglected to remember her name. This was a key point; if he got it right, chances were she would be more open to him. Wrong? Well, some cats were quite picky about their names. "It's Blazingcomet," He told her. Thinking for a moment, he decided it would be better to ask and have it imprinted into his mind then try and guess and run the risk of getting it wrong. "Sorry. I'm not very good with names either, heh... I can't seem to remember yours." He laughed, a little embarassed but trying to play it off as though it were light. Nothing at all. Hopefully, she wouldn't be too annoyed.

At his comments about how pretty she was, Gingerblossom's smile got a little brighter. "Oh why thank you, you are so sweet!" She purred good-naturedly. "It's good that there are cats who give compliments, it can always just brighten anyone's day! My day's already pretty great, but that made it even better!" Ginger was always the cat to give out compliments, but she didn't mind when others gave her some. That just proved to her how nice all cats were. When the tom told the pale-colored she-cat his name, her eyes widened,
it was surprising that they could even go that big. "Blazingcomet? That's such a cool name!" Gingerblossom said it a few more times, changing her tone each time she said it. "It's really unique, I'll definitely remember that one!" Of course, the unorganized she-cat wasn't that good with names, but there were certain ones that she knew she'd be able to remember. Such as "Blazingcomet." She just really liked the sound of it. When he asked her name,
she simply flicked her tail and meowed, "My name's Gingerblossom! Here's how I tell most cats to remember it." With her tail, the calico pointed a ginger spot on her fur. "Ginger spots all over my pelt." She then flicked her ear where the flower was. "Always wearing flowers in my fur." She then sat up straight, her tail swooping through the air with a graceful "swoosh." "So, Gingerblossom!" Gingerblossom announced loudly, and focused her mint-colored hues on Blazingcomet once more.

[lone]

Originally Posted by RedHead

At his comments about how pretty she was, Gingerblossom's smile got a little brighter. "Oh why thank you, you are so sweet!" She purred good-naturedly. "It's good that there are cats who give compliments, it can always just brighten anyone's day! My day's already pretty great, but that made it even better!" Ginger was always the cat to give out compliments, but she didn't mind when others gave her some. That just proved to her how nice all cats were. When the tom told the pale-colored she-cat his name, her eyes widened,

it was surprising that they could even go that big. "Blazingcomet? That's such a cool name!" Gingerblossom said it a few more times, changing her tone each time she said it. "It's really unique, I'll definitely remember that one!" Of course, the unorganized she-cat wasn't that good with names, but there were certain ones that she knew she'd be able to remember. Such as "Blazingcomet." She just really liked the sound of it. When he asked her name,

she simply flicked her tail and meowed, "My name's Gingerblossom! Here's how I tell most cats to remember it." With her tail, the calico pointed a ginger spot on her fur. "Ginger spots all over my pelt." She then flicked her ear where the flower was. "Always wearing flowers in my fur." She then sat up straight, her tail swooping through the air with a graceful "swoosh." "So, Gingerblossom!" Gingerblossom announced loudly, and focused her mint-colored hues on Blazingcomet once more.

The orange tom's hues widened. "Wh-- but--" He could hardly keep himself from mewing in surprise. Was she playing with him? Blazingcomet doubted it. He was used to she cats swooning and falling over their paws to get close to him, not.... doing whatever she was doing. What was she up to, anyways? Messing with his mind? Yes, yes, that sounded about right. She was playing some sort of a mind trick on him. Getting ready to completely destroy it. Am I even hearing myself? He thought with a shake of his head. There was no way the innocent-looking, sweet feline before him would do that. Then again-- he'd met some pretty manipulative cats. Cats who were great at this. But, she wasn't.
　
He normally had a feeling and he wasn't getting it at this moment. So, he supposed he must have been wrong... and there was no shame in that! After all, sometimes cats were just wrong. So what? As she complimented his own name, he looked surprised and then smiled. "Thank you!" His voice was happy, and interested as his grin only grew wider. After she had finished speaking again, he went over her words in his head. Ginger spots... always wearing flowers... huh, pretty cool! "I don't think I'll be likely to forget it now. You have a very pretty name, Gingerblossom... a pretty name for a pretty girl." He decided to try again. Maybe she was just confused or something. And this time, he brushed up against her lightly.
　
There! That should steer her in the right direction, show her what his intentions were. Well-- sort of, at least show her that he was interested. Trying to get her interested. Blazingcomet had played this game with hard-to-get cats before, but this was like playing keep-away on a whole new level. How strange it felt to have to try and gain a she cat's attention. He was used to just getting it, but now? He was having to work for it. And work very hard indeed. Was there something wrong with his tactics or her understanding? Either way, it looked like he was going to have to change his approach. Somehow.

[Brilliance]

Originally Posted by Lonestar23

Well, that wasn't necessarily true. If there had been any way for Asterpaw to accept this? She would have. But she was too scared to, too afraid of what her sister would do to the tom if she were to say anything. DO NOT CRY. That was the first thought that crossed her mind, and she obeyed it. "I-I w-want to accept it... b-but I'm no-not allowed to believe you..." Her voice kept catching in her throat. She was terrified to say anything about this. Nightmares... nightmares she'd purposely kept back were coming in again, whispering words of hatred and hissing at her as though she were the worst cat alive. Snarling at her like she had just killed every cat. Her sister had controlled her, using her as a puppet while her friends were the strings. Of course! She was doing the same thing here. But physically, and not mentally. She'd been doing it even when they first met the toms, Asterpaw was certain. She remembered now. She had let the memories in, and she realized.
　
Her sister had taken Lionpaw from her. Nightpaw from her. Foxpaw from her. He needed to know this, maybe... maybe there was still a way to turn this around. All he has to do is give Alli a whole bunch of compliments, and she'll quit. She's smitten with her compliments. I'm pretty sure they're the only things she loves in life, Asterpaw thought with a confident nod, before the nightmares returned and her expression with them. "Because... because she'll t-take you away. She'll t-take you aw-away and then kill you. If she kn-knows you think I-I-I'm better on any level. Smarter... stronger... faster... prettier, more beautiful... more fun... kinder... an-anything except b-broken." Because she knows that's what I am, and I can't help it. Technically the white feline had made her this way. She could still change it, but it was probably too late... too late for her, at any rate. Too much energy spent into other things, and now it was drained.
　
Had her sister had a part in that as well? Probably. Alabasterpaw could have controlled the sun and moon and still not surprised the blue cat. And no, it wasn't thinking highly of her sister. She dreaded that idea. The feline fixed her gaze on him and began to speak. He deserved to know the truth. This truth. And, it appeared she had to tell him. "Ever since I was a kit, Alli and I played games." The feline said the word games like she was talking about something very much undesired, or something that was so horrible she could barely even speak it. "Games where she would ask a question, and I would answer, or I would ask a question and she would answer. It was supposed to be a 'getting to know you' game, for when she first moved here, but we kept playing it her way." Asterpaw closed her eyes, trying to remember this exactly as it had happened. It'd been a turning point for her life. It had been the moment when she knew Alabasterpaw was in charge.
　
The moment when she knew that she was going to do everything her sister asked, because she loved her. And Alabasterpaw? Never even lifted so much as a claw to help her. Whatsoever."She'd ask questions like 'who's the best, prettiest, etc.' and I would always have to answer her. Then she'd ask 'who's the worst, ugliest, etc.' and I would have to answer me. There wasn't supposed to be any wrong or right answers, but she changed that... she doesn't have to play by the rules, apparently." Her voice was on the edge of sarcasm, but cracking at the same time. As painful as this was... since her sister wasn't around, and would hopefully never know, she'd be okay. And besides! Alabasterpaw never asked her not to tell anyone. His next words sent pain shooting through her. She wanted to answer softly. But she didn't have it in her. Everything she had was telling her to yell, to freak out, to tell him what he was doing and how he was hurting her. Much as it had earlier, but like then... there was nothing left in her.
　

"I thought that's what you wanted. Guess what? Maybe I can't read your mind, or whatever. You told me to go, and I said I would. All I wanted to do was do something right. Hope you're happy, you've proved I can't."

Her voice was sarcastic, but her voice held a touch of the quiver from earlier in it. "Maybe you should go ahead and walk away. Go ahead and find my sister, tell her you want to be with her. It's just a matter of time, anyways. You might think it won't happen, but she plays mind games that are beyond anything else." This, in her mind, was true. Everyone, in the end... ended up either away from her or with Alabasterpaw. Sometimes another cat, though her sister normally saw to that just as well. I can't lose him... that was very much clear in her mind. She couldn't lose the tom who meant so very much to her, more then she could say. Right then, she wanted the physical contact. It was comforting. And had been so gentle earlier, but... she was afraid to ask.
　
To say anything. To so much as make a movement in that direction. Except for apologize. "I'm s-sorry... I can't do anything right... I'm just so s-scared..." Her voice trailed off and she lowered her head until she was positive she could speak again. "I'm scared to believe you, or to accept it. The last cat who told me that... she took him away. She took him away from me, and I never saw him again. He told me... I was beautiful. And I was so excited, because no one had ever thought of me like that before, so I went to tell my sister, and the next day he was brushing up against her, purring like she was a princess. I-I wouldn't t-tell her again, but... she finds out." Her voice lowered and now, now tears began to fill her grey-green hues. She didn't know if he even realized how much he broke her sometimes. Or, resurfaced memories that broke her. Not in the same way. It was more of like reopening old wounds... and every now and then, adding new ones.
　
New ones that weren't always as bad, they just scarred over, leaving imprints on her mind and on her heart. She swallowed, before going on. "She'll take you away from me." She'd said so before; just a few moments ago; but now she felt like it was necessary to repeat it. She didn't want him, a close friend and a cat that seemed to make everything brighter for her, to be ripped away just like everyone else. Was that what Alabasterpaw wanted? And now, she wanted the contact more then ever. Shifting her weight, she looked down at her paws. "I-I really c-c-can't lose you... I n-need you." Her voice was a quiet whisper, and she looked at him with the softest of expressions. Please don't leave me... they would have to say goodbye sometime, but she didn't want to. Despite what her first impression might have been, he was now the best friend she'd ever had, and probably would ever have. Slowly, cautiously, the feline began to move towards him.
　
Until her pelt was lightly touching his. Just so she could feel he was there, maybe. Slowly, softly, she moved a little closer until she was pressed up against him. And she stayed there. Perhaps she just needed the feeling right then, or maybe she just wanted him to understand. And, to be safe. If anything else happened to him... if she left, and something happened... it would be harder to forgive herself then the first time. After a moment, she gently pulled away. "You're so dirty," The she cat laughed a little, and then did something that surprised even her. Softly, as though she were afraid to touch him now, she began to clean his grey pelt. She was used to doing this with Alabasterpaw, so it wasn't as though it bothered her... but she was unsure about it all the same. Was he even going to appreciate this? Or, as she could imagine, would he be bothered by her? And she still wanted him to understand everything she had said earlier. She was half-expecting Alabasterpaw to jump out of nowhere.
　
She had awful experiences with her sister, and now, the cat was haunting her mind. When Alabasterpaw's demonic expression came into her mind, she jumped back with a yelp-- landing on her hurt paw-- and, for the second time, collapsed quickly. "I'm fine! Just... I thought I saw something," She was quick to speak just in case he thought she was actually hurt. And of course she wasn't... a little shaken, but not hurt again. A softer moment had been what she needed to get her thoughts back on track. Just as long as he were to go to her sister, and tell her everything that was amazing about her, perhaps Alabasterpaw would leave the grey tom alone. Though, she doubted he'd want to stoop that low. Please... it'll be alright, but y-you can't just hope that she'll leave you alone... you have to give her something... she did owe him her life. She owed him everything. And yet, her life wasn't even worth that. It had been to him, but she didn't understand why he cared so much about her.
　
And, the question left her maw before she had time to think. "Why did you think I was worth dying for?" She asked in a quiet voice, looking down at the ground. The subject hurt every time she thought about it, but she wanted to know. She wanted to know how come he believed she was worth paying the ultimate sacrifice for. Because, she didn't think she was. Especially for a problem that she still thought of herself as the root of. Asterpaw looked at him half expectantly, awaiting an answer that she wasn't sure whether it was coming or not. But, she could hope so. She wanted to know.

The tom stood tensed to his spot as Asterpaw poured out to him. He didn't think the she cat would be that extremely fragile. She was just strong-- just yelling at him for complimenting her, and now she's in her unguarded state? Warning him about Alabasterpaw's intentions? As if he hadn't known already. The white demon was too stuck in her own little lalaland. He wanted to laugh. The last time he said that, the cats around him got defensive, and he got knocked down by his best friend. But, wasn't it true? It's not like the tom ever spoke lies. From what Asterpaw was telling him, her sister enjoyed the light gleaming down on her alabaster pelt because she knew she was a pretty attractive, and possibly could have any tom in the clan if she wanted. This made him snort. Not any tom. At least, not one tom. Azulpaw found himself, rather...repulsed by the she cat. Though, yes, he believed she was, in fact, a pretty gem, but she wasn't the define of beauty he pondered about.

To Azulpaw beauty was more than a pelt style and eye color. Oh, yes, he have met many beauties, but he never got the courage to talk about them. When they were close, Bluepaw used to pick out different females in the clan and ask Azulpaw of an opinion of them. The grey tom would be uninterested, but if one did catch his eye, he would only simply nod, and turn away. Bluepaw always seeked Azulpaw's help when googling at the she cats. Azulpaw would often become annoyed, and snap at his best friend. He knew, at the time, the tom needed help talking to she cats. For Azulpaw he couldn't care any less. He could talk to any gender he wanted, but he never chose to, coming off as aggressive or unfriendly. And, he was. And, he was fine with what others thought of him. Those who he allowed under his skin saw the real him, anyway. Azulpaw was not known for putting up a front. He was rather blunt, rather quiet. Appeared cold when first staring at him. He never would smile or acknowledge anyone that he didn't know.

Yet, he was in a clan that he held respect for much cats. He held a profound respect for Auroraflame, the deputy. He seen her around a few times, giving humor to anyone's day, and he always found her as a pretty feline. Then he carried an exceeding amount of respect for Grousestar, the leader of Skyclan. This was being he was...the leader. He provided a home and shelter for their clan, and he always protected them. And, some cats the tom respected more than others,and as for others, such as Alabasterpaw, he did not respect at all. He wasn't even afraid of the hostile white cat. He was afraid for the blue feline around him. He was afraid that if Alabasterpaw didn't hurt him, he would hurt her. Did he want to risk that? Sure, she did provide a few bruises to the blue cat, but it wasn't as brutal as she had been with him. The tom wondered if it was because they were sisters. And, family--not matter what--hurt one another to the point where one would look half-dead. Azulpaw didn't have any siblings. At least, not that he knew of. As he grew up with Bluepaw, who became like a brother to him, he knew that eventually at one point in their lives, one of them would turn on each other. Bluepaw wouldn't mind hearing his killing squeal since he wasn't any part of kin to him.

''Games, huh?''Azulpaw asked, absently. He looked off into the distance, thinking about what the she cat said. Games were never fun when others decided to take over and not follow the rules. Rules were there for a reason.To keep others safe, to provide a fair play, to make sure no prissy cats got the bigger load of trying to take over. Azulpaw and Bluepaw played games all the time, but it was never depended solely on physical or mental stabilities. It was more the good-natured Race you to the to the tree line! Whoever loses is a fox-brain! Or How far do you think I can climb without falling off? Even so, the thought of the games made Azulpaw purr. How he missed times like those when Bluepaw was hardly interested in she cats and would prefer looking at the pretty beings from a distance. ''Those games don't sound fun.'' He mewed, at last coming back to reality. ''In fact, Silverpaw and I played the questions game when she was a kit and I recently turned into an apprentice. It was always innocent, though.'' He shrugged. He knew they were all different by a long shot, and Alabasterpaw was pretty predictable when it came to things such as beauty or being the best. She was fond of the compliments she received, and rolled herself around to get more. Azulpaw never much such a cat in vain. It honestly broke his heart. He didn't have time to feel remorse for her--and why should he? She almost killed him--twice. She left him was scars to remember forever, and a curled shell that cautiously looked around to avoid getting jumped on once more. This did not stop the tom for putting on a brave face. He was around Asterpaw, and as long as he was around her, he would, at least try to pretend that he was okay. That he was brave, and that he would get through anything.

Azulpaw felt like a broken hollow, tripped of a roof, and exposed to the cold. He wrapped his tail around him, and pinning his ears to his head, he curled his lip back in a snarl. ''You can believe you want to believe. If you continue allowing that wrenched half-sister of yours to plague your mind, then it's seriously something wrong with you.'' His tone was calm, not wanting to sound harsh. He could tell he had hit a nerve with her, and he didn't want to see glistening tears in her eyes. He had felt uncomfortable at the sweet words she said to him. She didn't want to lose him. She was genuinely scared for him, but even Azulpaw believed that she would do absolutely a lot better without him. Did she really need him? Or, did she want him? And, why did she assume that she needed him? So, in case Alabasterpaw came back and attacked, that Azulpaw would lay his life down on the life for her...once more? The tom shook his head. What selfish thoughts consumed him, as his feelings started to shatter apart. He has told her to leave, and she stood by her word. What a stupid word! He thought, believing that if he were in her shoes, he would betray his own word when a friend told him to leave, when they truly needed the company. And, though as he tried. He couldn't even blame her for that.

The tom sunk to the ground, a sudden wash of tiredness entered him, and he half-lidded his eyes. What were they going to do? How could they solve this issue, and stop all this chaos before...one of them did end up--No, he had to rephrase that. As long as he was prowling this earth, he wouldn't dare allow anything or anyone to hurt Asterpaw if it's not Starclan itself. So, what would they do? To stop all this chaos before he ended up in the ground?

As she said her next words, he felt his ears pricked, and his tail lashed once in annoyance. What did she take him as? Go, and be with her sister? Azulpaw felt his heart drop from the sudden tone of her voice, and he couldn't even look at her. So, he didn't. Instead, he clawed at the ground, his nose twitching. Now, he was agitated. Did Asterpaw seriously believe he would want to be with a demon that almost killed him? Twice!? The tom wanted to tell her off, but he didn't. Instead, he ignored what she said, but he kept his eyes off of her. Knowing if he did land them on her, they would be dangerous slits, and Azulpaw did not have time to tussle with the blue feline. He was already in pain, and not in the condition to prove his new combat moves he learned for the past moon of deliberately ignoring her. It also dawned on him that he didn't do a good job at ignoring her. If he did, this would had all be avoided, and he wouldn't be in this condition. And, she? She wouldn't be in pain. Emotionally or physically.

As his eyes stayed scanned on the ground, the tom twitched his ears once more as he heard Asterpaw's voice. Something about this other tom...who had called her beautiful, but ended up in the clutches of Alabasterpaw--the white cat instead. A thought loomed over him; would he be that way? The grey tom scoffed, of course he wouldn't. He did not know about this other time, or whatever happened to him, but he also knew he wasn't that tom. He felt that Asterpaw was questioning where his loyalties lie. Did she think he would abandon her because her sister sauntered around him, and made him feel like he was the best tom in the whole forest? That he was on top of the world? He didn't need Alabasterpaw for that type of thing. His confidence already soared, though it was rocking, swishing lightly as if it were a boat on the sail, going from side to side, from doubting to believing. That's exactly where his confidence level was. Not extremely high, the tom still felt boastful, but also not extremely low.

As she continued talking, Azulpaw silence grew on, but he let out a tiny sigh, and to his surprise, he felt her fur tickle his. He glanced up once, finding her closer than she was before, and she edged even closer to him to where their pelts were brushing. It didn't make him uncomfortable. In fact, it made him feel at peace, and whatever grudge he found himself holding against her, melted away. ''I'm not going to leave,'' He first says,emitting out a groan. ''I'm sorry about whatever happened between you and Alabasterpaw, but you should know that I'm fox-brained to leave fall for your sister. Did you forget that she almost sent me Starclan--twice?'' He snorted, though it made him laugh a bit, despite the painful memory. ''You don't have to allow yourself to be scared of what Alabasterpaw might do to you. As long as I'm here, I won't let anything happen to you. And, besides,'' He looked up into the distance, removing his tail from around himself, and putting it limply behind Asterpaw. ''I know...Bluepaw won't allow you to be hurt. He's quite...smitten to you.'' The tom quietly stated. Bluepaw was dangerously fond of Asterpaw, that the grey tom feared for her future with the piebald cat. He didn't know what extreme measures might Bluepaw pull if Asterpaw rejected him in any way. Azulpaw would not allow himself to see Asterpaw hurt at the paws of Bluepaw. His eyes clouded over, and he looked up towards the sky, and binked slowly, giving a wordless prayer to Starclan to keep the female safe beside him.

Soon, he heard her remark,and a small laugh escaped his maw, as she began grooming him. The didn't pull back, or bring himself closer as he felt her do her deed. He felt grateful because he knew he was dirty. His pelt didn't even look like the glossy grey it had been. Instead, it looked pretty dirty, mixed with dust and debris, and he was going to groom himself, but every part of his body hurt, so he was thankful to have a friend do it for him. As she was grooming, he felt a chill go down his spine, but he refused to move. He didn't have to because she was the one who stepped back first. He sharply turned towards her, as he seen her collapsed, and he got up, despite his own condition. His fur bristled, standing along his spine, until she got up and said that she was fine.

''Will be more careful, will you?'' He limped towards her slowly, and exaimed her leg, feeling a slight discomfort, knowing that he was the problem as to why she had done this to herself. He slowly blinked, turning his eyes to look up at her, and carefully scanned her body for anything else that might be hurting her. She did seem fine, so he sat down on his haunches,believing her, still wary of her, and still worried for her. ''You worry, I hope you know that.'' He mews, quietly. Aside from he sister's bad influence, he figured she was dealing with some inner guards as well. Not fully trusting herself, but having no choice. It was a sad sight. And, Azulpaw felt even more weaker that he could hardly help her. ''It'll make it harder for me to say goodbye...'' He trailed off, thinking. He didn't want to say goodbye. He wasn't looking forward to the sadness in their eyes, and the slouching of their position as they stalked off. He wasn't ready to start looking behind his shoulder at every step they took, tempting him to run back to her, but forcing himself to move on. He wasn't ready for that. ''I guess I'm going to be staying longer than I need to. I don't care about Bluepaw or Alabasterpaw. If they kill me, then so be it, but I can't say goodbye to you, Asterpaw.'' His voice was solemn, calm, truthful. He wasn't exactly afraid of the two other cats in themselves, but he was afraid of the trouble they would cause in the future moon. He couldn't bring himself to say goodbye to his dearest friend. Not now, not ever.

And, her last words hit him like a boulder, wiping him to the side. He blinked slowly, looking at her, his eyes wide as he couldn't exactly pinpoint an exact reason as to why he would do anything for her. Being apart of the clan meant he had to risk his life for all his clan mates, and his higher authority. If need be, he would have to put his life on the line for fellow clan mates, he could hardly stand. Asterpaw was on the lucky side when it came to how he felt about her. He would put his life on the line for feline in front of him. He would do the same for Silverpaw...maybe, even Bluepaw. Gently, he reached out to put a paw on top of hers, but flinched it away before it made complete contact. He slowly put it back down on his side, and lifted his head, clearing his throat. ''You are worth as much to me as the sun and the stars. I appreciate the sun for giving me light in the day, and silverpelt for the light at night. Without them, I would be tumbling around blindly, as everyone else. You may not know it, Astperaw, but it's there. That feeling of care and love--it's there. And, without you...?'' He trailed off, not knowing how he would finish it, but he hoped that she would understand what he meant by this.

No cat was an individual. As a clan, they lived as one, a family, all connected by different coloring and personalities. No matter what they did, each cat had their place, and each were loved in their own way. Protected in their own way. A warrior was expected to give his life on the line if a queen, kit, or elder--even their leader was in a threatening position. That's what Azulpaw knew for sure. He wanted to be that type of warrior. Not afraid to back down, and to kill if necessary. Only, if necessary, however. Alabasterpaw or Bluepaw did not get this.

As the tom sat there watching the blue cat in front of him, tried to small, albeit it was smile and weak. ''I'm sorry that you had to play such games with that tyrant sister of yours, but you don't have to believe them. Games are games, and that's all they will ever be. Don't go through life feeling insecure because of a stupid game. And, if your sister decides to find out, and try to take away every cat, just know that I would--and could never be tamed by her. Not while I remember what she done to me. And, though I forgive her,'' He gulped, looking away again, and aimlessly into the distance. He shuffled in his position, feeling tensed. ''I could never trust her.'' Azulpaw would keep a great distance from the piebald tom and the white she cat. He would not tolerate infighting in their clan. As much as he knew, Azulpaw believed that the other two cats were fighting a one-sided battle. Azulpaw was completely through, and he only would fight if he needed to protect the she cat in front of him. That was the only reason he would lay a paw upon them. Weak, or not. On the verge of dying, or not. Asterpaw did not deserve to be battled with by her sister. Asterpaw did not deserved to be harassed by Bluepaw. Though, she did deserve to be protected. Azulpaw knew full well that she would be able to handle herself, so he didn't tell her his thoughts specifically as to why he decided to not say goodbye. And, he hoped that she wouldn't ask questions. Possibly, if they were lucky, they would be able to meet in secret, and carry on little play sessions to be happy and be themselves without the fear of the other two breathing down their necks.

[lone]

Originally Posted by Noire

The tom stood tensed to his spot as Asterpaw poured out to him. He didn't think the she cat would be that extremely fragile. She was just strong-- just yelling at him for complimenting her, and now she's in her unguarded state? Warning him about Alabasterpaw's intentions? As if he hadn't known already. The white demon was too stuck in her own little lalaland. He wanted to laugh. The last time he said that, the cats around him got defensive, and he got knocked down by his best friend. But, wasn't it true? It's not like the tom ever spoke lies. From what Asterpaw was telling him, her sister enjoyed the light gleaming down on her alabaster pelt because she knew she was a pretty attractive, and possibly could have any tom in the clan if she wanted. This made him snort. Not any tom. At least, not one tom. Azulpaw found himself, rather...repulsed by the she cat. Though, yes, he believed she was, in fact, a pretty gem, but she wasn't the define of beauty he pondered about.

To Azulpaw beauty was more than a pelt style and eye color. Oh, yes, he have met many beauties, but he never got the courage to talk about them. When they were close, Bluepaw used to pick out different females in the clan and ask Azulpaw of an opinion of them. The grey tom would be uninterested, but if one did catch his eye, he would only simply nod, and turn away. Bluepaw always seeked Azulpaw's help when googling at the she cats. Azulpaw would often become annoyed, and snap at his best friend. He knew, at the time, the tom needed help talking to she cats. For Azulpaw he couldn't care any less. He could talk to any gender he wanted, but he never chose to, coming off as aggressive or unfriendly. And, he was. And, he was fine with what others thought of him. Those who he allowed under his skin saw the real him, anyway. Azulpaw was not known for putting up a front. He was rather blunt, rather quiet. Appeared cold when first staring at him. He never would smile or acknowledge anyone that he didn't know.

Yet, he was in a clan that he held respect for much cats. He held a profound respect for Auroraflame, the deputy. He seen her around a few times, giving humor to anyone's day, and he always found her as a pretty feline. Then he carried an exceeding amount of respect for Grousestar, the leader of Skyclan. This was being he was...the leader. He provided a home and shelter for their clan, and he always protected them. And, some cats the tom respected more than others,and as for others, such as Alabasterpaw, he did not respect at all. He wasn't even afraid of the hostile white cat. He was afraid for the blue feline around him. He was afraid that if Alabasterpaw didn't hurt him, he would hurt her. Did he want to risk that? Sure, she did provide a few bruises to the blue cat, but it wasn't as brutal as she had been with him. The tom wondered if it was because they were sisters. And, family--not matter what--hurt one another to the point where one would look half-dead. Azulpaw didn't have any siblings. At least, not that he knew of. As he grew up with Bluepaw, who became like a brother to him, he knew that eventually at one point in their lives, one of them would turn on each other. Bluepaw wouldn't mind hearing his killing squeal since he wasn't any part of kin to him.

''Games, huh?''Azulpaw asked, absently. He looked off into the distance, thinking about what the she cat said. Games were never fun when others decided to take over and not follow the rules. Rules were there for a reason.To keep others safe, to provide a fair play, to make sure no prissy cats got the bigger load of trying to take over. Azulpaw and Bluepaw played games all the time, but it was never depended solely on physical or mental stabilities. It was more the good-natured Race you to the to the tree line! Whoever loses is a fox-brain! Or How far do you think I can climb without falling off? Even so, the thought of the games made Azulpaw purr. How he missed times like those when Bluepaw was hardly interested in she cats and would prefer looking at the pretty beings from a distance. ''Those games don't sound fun.'' He mewed, at last coming back to reality. ''In fact, Silverpaw and I played the questions game when she was a kit and I recently turned into an apprentice. It was always innocent, though.'' He shrugged. He knew they were all different by a long shot, and Alabasterpaw was pretty predictable when it came to things such as beauty or being the best. She was fond of the compliments she received, and rolled herself around to get more. Azulpaw never much such a cat in vain. It honestly broke his heart. He didn't have time to feel remorse for her--and why should he? She almost killed him--twice. She left him was scars to remember forever, and a curled shell that cautiously looked around to avoid getting jumped on once more. This did not stop the tom for putting on a brave face. He was around Asterpaw, and as long as he was around her, he would, at least try to pretend that he was okay. That he was brave, and that he would get through anything.

Azulpaw felt like a broken hollow, tripped of a roof, and exposed to the cold. He wrapped his tail around him, and pinning his ears to his head, he curled his lip back in a snarl. ''You can believe you want to believe. If you continue allowing that wrenched half-sister of yours to plague your mind, then it's seriously something wrong with you.'' His tone was calm, not wanting to sound harsh. He could tell he had hit a nerve with her, and he didn't want to see glistening tears in her eyes. He had felt uncomfortable at the sweet words she said to him. She didn't want to lose him. She was genuinely scared for him, but even Azulpaw believed that she would do absolutely a lot better without him. Did she really need him? Or, did she want him? And, why did she assume that she needed him? So, in case Alabasterpaw came back and attacked, that Azulpaw would lay his life down on the life for her...once more? The tom shook his head. What selfish thoughts consumed him, as his feelings started to shatter apart. He has told her to leave, and she stood by her word. What a stupid word! He thought, believing that if he were in her shoes, he would betray his own word when a friend told him to leave, when they truly needed the company. And, though as he tried. He couldn't even blame her for that.

The tom sunk to the ground, a sudden wash of tiredness entered him, and he half-lidded his eyes. What were they going to do? How could they solve this issue, and stop all this chaos before...one of them did end up--No, he had to rephrase that. As long as he was prowling this earth, he wouldn't dare allow anything or anyone to hurt Asterpaw if it's not Starclan itself. So, what would they do? To stop all this chaos before he ended up in the ground?

As she said her next words, he felt his ears pricked, and his tail lashed once in annoyance. What did she take him as? Go, and be with her sister? Azulpaw felt his heart drop from the sudden tone of her voice, and he couldn't even look at her. So, he didn't. Instead, he clawed at the ground, his nose twitching. Now, he was agitated. Did Asterpaw seriously believe he would want to be with a demon that almost killed him? Twice!? The tom wanted to tell her off, but he didn't. Instead, he ignored what she said, but he kept his eyes off of her. Knowing if he did land them on her, they would be dangerous slits, and Azulpaw did not have time to tussle with the blue feline. He was already in pain, and not in the condition to prove his new combat moves he learned for the past moon of deliberately ignoring her. It also dawned on him that he didn't do a good job at ignoring her. If he did, this would had all be avoided, and he wouldn't be in this condition. And, she? She wouldn't be in pain. Emotionally or physically.

As his eyes stayed scanned on the ground, the tom twitched his ears once more as he heard Asterpaw's voice. Something about this other tom...who had called her beautiful, but ended up in the clutches of Alabasterpaw--the white cat instead. A thought loomed over him; would he be that way? The grey tom scoffed, of course he wouldn't. He did not know about this other time, or whatever happened to him, but he also knew he wasn't that tom. He felt that Asterpaw was questioning where his loyalties lie. Did she think he would abandon her because her sister sauntered around him, and made him feel like he was the best tom in the whole forest? That he was on top of the world? He didn't need Alabasterpaw for that type of thing. His confidence already soared, though it was rocking, swishing lightly as if it were a boat on the sail, going from side to side, from doubting to believing. That's exactly where his confidence level was. Not extremely high, the tom still felt boastful, but also not extremely low.

As she continued talking, Azulpaw silence grew on, but he let out a tiny sigh, and to his surprise, he felt her fur tickle his. He glanced up once, finding her closer than she was before, and she edged even closer to him to where their pelts were brushing. It didn't make him uncomfortable. In fact, it made him feel at peace, and whatever grudge he found himself holding against her, melted away. ''I'm not going to leave,'' He first says,emitting out a groan. ''I'm sorry about whatever happened between you and Alabasterpaw, but you should know that I'm fox-brained to leave fall for your sister. Did you forget that she almost sent me Starclan--twice?'' He snorted, though it made him laugh a bit, despite the painful memory. ''You don't have to allow yourself to be scared of what Alabasterpaw might do to you. As long as I'm here, I won't let anything happen to you. And, besides,'' He looked up into the distance, removing his tail from around himself, and putting it limply behind Asterpaw. ''I know...Bluepaw won't allow you to be hurt. He's quite...smitten to you.'' The tom quietly stated. Bluepaw was dangerously fond of Asterpaw, that the grey tom feared for her future with the piebald cat. He didn't know what extreme measures might Bluepaw pull if Asterpaw rejected him in any way. Azulpaw would not allow himself to see Asterpaw hurt at the paws of Bluepaw. His eyes clouded over, and he looked up towards the sky, and binked slowly, giving a wordless prayer to Starclan to keep the female safe beside him.

Soon, he heard her remark,and a small laugh escaped his maw, as she began grooming him. The didn't pull back, or bring himself closer as he felt her do her deed. He felt grateful because he knew he was dirty. His pelt didn't even look like the glossy grey it had been. Instead, it looked pretty dirty, mixed with dust and debris, and he was going to groom himself, but every part of his body hurt, so he was thankful to have a friend do it for him. As she was grooming, he felt a chill go down his spine, but he refused to move. He didn't have to because she was the one who stepped back first. He sharply turned towards her, as he seen her collapsed, and he got up, despite his own condition. His fur bristled, standing along his spine, until she got up and said that she was fine.

''Will be more careful, will you?'' He limped towards her slowly, and exaimed her leg, feeling a slight discomfort, knowing that he was the problem as to why she had done this to herself. He slowly blinked, turning his eyes to look up at her, and carefully scanned her body for anything else that might be hurting her. She did seem fine, so he sat down on his haunches,believing her, still wary of her, and still worried for her. ''You worry, I hope you know that.'' He mews, quietly. Aside from he sister's bad influence, he figured she was dealing with some inner guards as well. Not fully trusting herself, but having no choice. It was a sad sight. And, Azulpaw felt even more weaker that he could hardly help her. ''It'll make it harder for me to say goodbye...'' He trailed off, thinking. He didn't want to say goodbye. He wasn't looking forward to the sadness in their eyes, and the slouching of their position as they stalked off. He wasn't ready to start looking behind his shoulder at every step they took, tempting him to run back to her, but forcing himself to move on. He wasn't ready for that. ''I guess I'm going to be staying longer than I need to. I don't care about Bluepaw or Alabasterpaw. If they kill me, then so be it, but I can't say goodbye to you, Asterpaw.'' His voice was solemn, calm, truthful. He wasn't exactly afraid of the two other cats in themselves, but he was afraid of the trouble they would cause in the future moon. He couldn't bring himself to say goodbye to his dearest friend. Not now, not ever.

And, her last words hit him like a boulder, wiping him to the side. He blinked slowly, looking at her, his eyes wide as he couldn't exactly pinpoint an exact reason as to why he would do anything for her. Being apart of the clan meant he had to risk his life for all his clan mates, and his higher authority. If need be, he would have to put his life on the line for fellow clan mates, he could hardly stand. Asterpaw was on the lucky side when it came to how he felt about her. He would put his life on the line for feline in front of him. He would do the same for Silverpaw...maybe, even Bluepaw. Gently, he reached out to put a paw on top of hers, but flinched it away before it made complete contact. He slowly put it back down on his side, and lifted his head, clearing his throat. ''You are worth as much to me as the sun and the stars. I appreciate the sun for giving me light in the day, and silverpelt for the light at night. Without them, I would be tumbling around blindly, as everyone else. You may not know it, Astperaw, but it's there. That feeling of care and love--it's there. And, without you...?'' He trailed off, not knowing how he would finish it, but he hoped that she would understand what he meant by this.

No cat was an individual. As a clan, they lived as one, a family, all connected by different coloring and personalities. No matter what they did, each cat had their place, and each were loved in their own way. Protected in their own way. A warrior was expected to give his life on the line if a queen, kit, or elder--even their leader was in a threatening position. That's what Azulpaw knew for sure. He wanted to be that type of warrior. Not afraid to back down, and to kill if necessary. Only, if necessary, however. Alabasterpaw or Bluepaw did not get this.

As the tom sat there watching the blue cat in front of him, tried to small, albeit it was smile and weak. ''I'm sorry that you had to play such games with that tyrant sister of yours, but you don't have to believe them. Games are games, and that's all they will ever be. Don't go through life feeling insecure because of a stupid game. And, if your sister decides to find out, and try to take away every cat, just know that I would--and could never be tamed by her. Not while I remember what she done to me. And, though I forgive her,'' He gulped, looking away again, and aimlessly into the distance. He shuffled in his position, feeling tensed. ''I could never trust her.'' Azulpaw would keep a great distance from the piebald tom and the white she cat. He would not tolerate infighting in their clan. As much as he knew, Azulpaw believed that the other two cats were fighting a one-sided battle. Azulpaw was completely through, and he only would fight if he needed to protect the she cat in front of him. That was the only reason he would lay a paw upon them. Weak, or not. On the verge of dying, or not. Asterpaw did not deserve to be battled with by her sister. Asterpaw did not deserved to be harassed by Bluepaw. Though, she did deserve to be protected. Azulpaw knew full well that she would be able to handle herself, so he didn't tell her his thoughts specifically as to why he decided to not say goodbye. And, he hoped that she wouldn't ask questions. Possibly, if they were lucky, they would be able to meet in secret, and carry on little play sessions to be happy and be themselves without the fear of the other two breathing down their necks.

If you allow that wretched half-sister of yours to plague your mind, then there is something seriously wrong with you. She didn't want Alabasterpaw to be in her head. But, she didn't know how to get the awful feline out. The harsh cruelty of what her beautiful, always noticed, always first place sister had told her before was forever in her head. And, perhaps she was right. Alabasterpaw was better in a lot of ways. If she wasn't, would she be the one who was being fawned over while Asterpaw was pushed to a corner until she was called to help the toms... only for Alabasterpaw to get a second chance?
　
That's when she'd begun warning them. At least they'd had the decency to believe her. And that was why Alabasterpaw had been so angry. At her. But, neither one had ever been able to stay angry at the other for long. Was her sister doing this to get back at her? Or Azulpaw? Or, both. Revenge was something that the blue feline had never really thought about before.
　
Even when her sister had taken Lionpaw.
　
Flirting with him, leading him on, and then ditching him, so broken that he wouldn't so much as look at her... say a single word to her... and left her in the dust, she hadn't thought about revenge. Though looking back she realized how much under her sister's spell she had honestly been. Alabasterpaw couldn't stand anyone else being better then her. Her games were rough. A shudder went down Asterpaw's spine as she envisioned them. She knew the types of games that Alabasterpaw was capable of... or at least, her sister called them games.
　
Asterpaw?
　
Well, she'd describe them more as torture. Mental and physical. Oh no, the white feline had never messed with someone physically before... as far as she knew. Was there something she was missing? Please don't let me be blind again. The she cat thought with a sigh as the tip of her tail twitched. After she had moved over to him, she heard him speak. His words both mended and cracked her heart. But... if his protection consists of what I've seen, then I don't want it. If Alabasterpaw did anything to her... would Bluepaw kill her own sister? And, the question that she was having to face... did she want Alabasterpaw dead?
　
Yes.
　
And no.
　
The she cat didn't deserve to live a happy life. She didn't deserve to live at all. But, buried in all her hidden feelings, where her worries and fears and secrets lay, was care for her sister. Love, even. How was it possible that she still loved the white feline? Because they were family. Nothing... nothing could break that, no matter how hard things might try. Even Alabasterpaw couldn't break the fact that they were family. And that Asterpaw was prepared to go to any length for her sister. Even if the she cat did eventually take away the cat that, at this point, was most important to her. Finally, feeling like she would be able to talk without her voice breaking, without the strain that she was constantly feeling pressing on her chest coming into her voice, Asterpaw spoke again.
　
"You don't have to remind me what she tried to do... believe me, I remember." Well, she thought she was ready, but her voice became softer anyways. More scared. Hurt and fear were the two things she could feel the strongest at this moment. They were choking her from the inside. But, those two things aside, a smile slowly lit up her grey-green hues and previously broken features.
　
"You'd do that even though I tried to push you out of a tree?" She asked, cocking her head to one side before her smile faded and her voice became much less confident. "I-I'm not scared of what she might do to me. She-- she wouldn't hurt me." I'm scared for what else she might do to you. That sounded unsure. And, in the previous moon? Asterpaw's voice would have been much more confident. Sounding as though it were beyond a shadow of a doubt that Alabasterpaw would never hurt her. Now she wasn't so sure. She knew Azulpaw-- and Bluepaw-- were both there, both trying to keep her from getting hurt.
　
Maybe that was why Alabasterpaw was so mad.
　
And, it was an easy fix! She knew it. That thought made her a little happier. Just a few little compliments and she would be fine again, she'd feel like she were on top of the world as Asterpaw remembered seeing her sister always acting. Or was it just that? Who knew. Either way, Alabasterpaw's anger would be gone, and she might even apologize... and then they would be fine! But... did she honestly want her sister to get those compliments? To be rewarded?
　
That's just SELFISH, Asterpaw. What is wrong with you? The blue feline was angry with herself that she wouldn't even tell him this to see if he would want to.
　
"I-I think... maybe... i-if she gets some attention, she'll... she'll calm down. And I know this is going to sound crazy, but..." Her voice trailed off and she sighed. "Maybe, maybe if you-- and Bluepaw-- both go give her some compliments, some attention, she'll calm down."
　
It was just a guess.
　
She knew how much her sister loved to be complimented, though. And she knew that Alabasterpaw generally would calm down if she was payed a few compliments, a flirtatious gesture here and there, and her sister would be as happy as ever. Going back to her 'stupid' self, living in her own world. But, she didn't live in her own world. She lived in the real world, and she hurt real cats.
　
Cats who were very close to Asterpaw. Either emotionally, or... physically. Either way she would do whatever it took to hurt them, to make them feel as pained as Asterpaw supposed she did when she didn't feel like a number one pretty feline.
　
"I do realize what I'm saying. Or... 'hear myself,' by the way." She added as quickly as she could. "But, here's why I'm saying this. Alabasterpaw says she's going to kill you, and then doesn't. I don't know why she was just p-" A pause as the she cat tried to get her thoughts back together, tried to mention the awful attack without feeling like she was a horrible cat.
　
Why did she feel like that?
　
Because with the games she used to play with her sister, everything had always been her fault. No matter what the rules of the game actually were. And the mind games Alabasterpaw used to play on her had added quite a bit to her guilt and her feeling useless. Of course they had. Wasn't that what they were for, to make the secondary player feel as though they were worthless... stupid... everything was their fault? Probably, knowing her sister.
　
"Why she was just playing around like that. I don't know if she even wants to kill, or if she's just interested in seeing you in pain, but if she is j-just interested in that, then she won't stop. She won't ever stop until she's either bored or she 'accidentally' kills you." Cue the faltering of her voice, fading out for just a moment. "Even if you don't want to do that, at least promise me you will fight back against her next time. Like I said, she's a coward. She uses manipulation to get her the upper hand. Call her bluff... she has to know you mean it. And she'll stop." Even if he did get hurt again, at least she would know that he wasn't just allowing her sister to play around.
　
Allowing her sister to try and kill him while he did nothing. Every time that memory showed up, it made her feel awful. She was scared at the same time that what she was asking would end up getting him killed. Again, selfish to ask that he do nothing.
　
Stupid.
　
A stupid thing to do. So she wasn't going to do that. Hopefully her sister wouldn't feel threatened and would believe him if he did call her bluff. That was the hopeful light that she was holding onto, the hope that eventually her sister would realize what she was doing.
　
She knew that Alabasterpaw was broken too.
　
She did things like this because of her brokenness. Having her mother leave her... never knowing her father... ohhh, such a harsh life for the young feline. But she hadn't needed to make herself feel better by putting Asterpaw down, and the blue feline was aware that Alabasterpaw knew it. Knew all of it. She knew she was prettier-- no, more beautiful... and better at flirting... and getting attention... and that she was more charming.
　
And Asterpaw? Average. Didn't get the point of flirting, she could use it, but seriously? She was terrible at getting attention. And charming wasn't a word that would ever be used to describe her. She was... nice, at least. Maybe. And when she was younger she hadn't even been nice, just cared about others' feelings. Well... that was nice, but not when someone first met her. Oh no, depending on how they treated her, she'd turn that treatment right back on them.
　
Even now, she attempted that. It didn't always work the way she hoped, but some of the time it did. Which gave her just the slightest bit of hope for the future... and the present as well. After she had already tripped and fallen, then gotten back up quickly-- not wanting him to worry too much, if at all-- she curled her tail around her paws and huffed slightly. "Yes. I'm the one who needs to be careful." Her voice was serious, but her hues sparked. She knew that he was just trying to look out for her, and she definitely appreciated that.
　
It was nice to have someone... well, besides Bluepaw... worried about her. But still, she didn't want him to worry right now. Right now, his focus needed to be on staying alive. Preferably forever-- well, no one lived forever, but at least for quite a while longer. Forever as long into the future as she could imagine, at any rate. Because that was her definition of forever. There was no guarantee of tomorrow, let alone that long, but Asterpaw could always hope. She'd always had hope.
　
Just a spark at times.
　
Just the slightest of glimmers, and yet it was still there for her even throughout all of this. Somehow Asterpaw had managed to hold onto it and somehow, she knew that she always would. There was no way for her not to. "Don't worry about me. I'm going to be fine... and I hope you know that." Carefully, Asterpaw allowed herself to make eye contact with the tom. Harder for you to say goodbye? Forgetting that they were, in fact, going to go their separate ways at some point, alarm spread through Asterpaw like a wildfire.
　
What did he mean, goodbye? What was going on? What was-- oh. Remembering seemed to send her spiraling back down to earth where her head had been in the clouds just moments before. She would be fine no matter what. She would survive. Learn to adapt, learn to deal with it. And, as long as she knew that he was safe... as long as she knew that he would live for a longer amount of time, perhaps find another cat who he would be able to play with as the two of them had done, well, she would be happy. When she thought of that at least. Happy and, though she didn't like the thought of it, jealous.
　
Jealousy bothered the blue feline. Jealousy, and anger, and hatred had sparked all of this. Those three feelings? Emotions? Whatever they were, they were now among the things she disliked most. Not hated. She didn't want to hate now, she was.... afraid to. Afraid it would drive her to the desperate measures it had driven her sister and previous friend.
　
Were they still friends?
　
One sided, at least-- just like their relationship. All one sided. And, as much as she hated to admit it, she might hate him. She strongly disliked him, at least. Very strongly. Strongly enough to the point where she might have been willing to say that she hated him, had she not been in Azulpaw's presence at that moment. If they kill me, so be it, but I can't say goodbye to you, Asterpaw. So... what-- what did that mean? He wasn't going to leave? He wouldn't... he would stay, even though it meant he could die? The ultimate sacrifice, Asterpaw had always been told.
　
She hadn't believed it before. Weren't there worse things? Technically yes. But she did not believe that he deserved to die. If they were going to kill him, they would be taking the life of a cat that had done nothing wrong. Nothing! So then, why? She still didn't understand how much jealousy, or anger, or hatred, or all three went into this. If it was all three, then... again, the feline wouldn't understand why.What kind of cat would hate/be angry with/be jealous of another so much that they would go to the extreme of taking their life? Taking it and making sure that they were dead for good.
　
Asterpaw had heard stories of cats coming back... whispered rumours around the clearing, and she didn't know if they were just rumours or something else entirely. Could there be a whisper of truth in those whispered rumors? No. Definitely not. If you were dead... you were dead. For good, that was it. "I can't say goodbye to you either..." Her voice was whispered, hushed, and she looked as though she were about to cry for a moment before she cleared her throat again and her voice became more playful. "So, no dying, okay? You're not allowed to. Okay? Okay. Glad you agree with me." And that was it, in her mind. He wasn't allowed to die.
　
He couldn't die.
　
Because she couldn't stand to have to say goodbye... not now, and not ever. She doubted she'd ever get any better at saying goodbyes.As annoying as that seemed, what other choice did she have but to make sure she didn't have to? Though she was saying goodbye to her close knit relationship with her sister. With Nightpaw. She'd said goodbye to Lionpaw. Not... to Bluepaw. Not quite yet. And she didn't know when she would be ready, but she was pretty confident it would be sometime soon.
　
It was time to end this once and for all. Make sure he knew that even if he were to snuff Azulpaw's life out, there was no way that she would be able to be with him. Breaking her word. She was going to break her word. Ugh, she hated the thought of that. It was better then the alternative, however, and that was the truth that she kept holding onto to keep her from backing out. His next words surprised her, and made her feel as though it would be ten times harder to let him go now. Eventually it would happen. If this carried on? It was only a matter of time, and she knew it, and she wondered if he did.
　
A heartbreak either way was the only way to stop this. She could go and be with Bluepaw. Cut off contact and break her own heart.... and from what he was telling her now, break his in the process. Or he would die. She bit her lip, trying to figure out if a lifetime of misery or a day of being with a friend was better. Safety and security had always been important to her. In the end, she supposed it was his choice... whatever he wanted, she would follow.
　
It was the only thing she had to give... her word.
　
It was the only thing of worth that she owned. The only thing that she would ever own. So, she had decided that it was better to realize this then to try and push it aside, risking the thought that she might turn into Alabasterpaw, thinking she was worth nothing more then appearance and toms.
　
Was she doing that now? No... she wasn't! That wasn't why Alabasterpaw was better then her! It couldn't be the only reason. There had to be others. Charm, for one thing. And... her attitude was better. She... got more attention? Was that it, besides pretty looks?
　
That couldn't be it. When he was finished speaking she held her breath for a moment and then carefully-- like she was scared to at all, like she normally was with contact-- she reached out her own paw and put it on top of his.
　
He was her north star.
　
The north star, Alabasterpaw had always told her-- her mother was from kittypet roots-- was something that had pointed 'sailors' home. Whatever sailors were. They used it to guide and direct them, and it was a source of comfort because they would follow it and no matter where they were, it would lead them back home. So Azulpaw was the north star in her life, and Alabasterpaw? It would seem the white feline didn't have one. What a surprise. Nothing guiding her back, she was just... drifting.
　
"You're my north star." Her voice was quiet, gentle, and she hoped he would understand.
　
It might sound like she was just babbling. North star? What does that mean, has she gone crazy? She could almost hear him thinking.
　
But, she would know. She would know that he was her guiding force, her north star... very important to her. She owed him everything. Everything she had. Which was just her word, and her trust... loyalty... and yes, love.
　
She loved him.
　
In a platonic way, but it was still there, and as far as she knew? It could continue to grow. It might. If it did she would have to be ready, and if it didn't, well... then she would still have to be just as ready. No matter what happened she'd have to be on her guard for whatever might go right or wrong in life. A moment later she removed her paw and curled her tail more tightly around herself. This had definitely become a barrier, a guard for her... a crutch. Something to lean on. Something to shut everything else out. She needed to learn to get along without it, but... did she want to?
　
Not really, no.
　
After all... how was she going to lose her tail? It would be weird and uncomfortable and strange if she did, and she would not only be losing her tail, but her security crutch along with it. Upon hearing his next words, a flash of alarm passed across her features. How can you forgive her? She wanted to ask, but she couldn't get the words out.
　
"Y-you... you... forgive her?" She asked, her voice scared and small.
　
Forgiveness was a strong thing to give Alabasterpaw. Even she was still working on forgiving the she cat. But, Azulpaw had somehow already forgiven her. And of course he wouldn't trust her. She wouldn't either. She would always be on guard around the feline now, wondering of her sister's true intentions. False or kind. Either way, she would be watching her back. Cautiously, she moved over to be beside him and gingerly rested her head on his shoulder. Thank you for being there for me. Thank you for understanding. Thank you for being my friend. Thank you for everything. All of those things were things she wanted to say, but when she opened her maw, only one came out:
　
"Thank you for being my north star."

[RedHead]

Originally Posted by Lonestar23

The orange tom's hues widened. "Wh-- but--" He could hardly keep himself from mewing in surprise. Was she playing with him? Blazingcomet doubted it. He was used to she cats swooning and falling over their paws to get close to him, not.... doing whatever she was doing. What was she up to, anyways? Messing with his mind? Yes, yes, that sounded about right. She was playing some sort of a mind trick on him. Getting ready to completely destroy it. Am I even hearing myself? He thought with a shake of his head. There was no way the innocent-looking, sweet feline before him would do that. Then again-- he'd met some pretty manipulative cats. Cats who were great at this. But, she wasn't.
　
He normally had a feeling and he wasn't getting it at this moment. So, he supposed he must have been wrong... and there was no shame in that! After all, sometimes cats were just wrong. So what? As she complimented his own name, he looked surprised and then smiled. "Thank you!" His voice was happy, and interested as his grin only grew wider. After she had finished speaking again, he went over her words in his head. Ginger spots... always wearing flowers... huh, pretty cool! "I don't think I'll be likely to forget it now. You have a very pretty name, Gingerblossom... a pretty name for a pretty girl." He decided to try again. Maybe she was just confused or something. And this time, he brushed up against her lightly.
　
There! That should steer her in the right direction, show her what his intentions were. Well-- sort of, at least show her that he was interested. Trying to get her interested. Blazingcomet had played this game with hard-to-get cats before, but this was like playing keep-away on a whole new level. How strange it felt to have to try and gain a she cat's attention. He was used to just getting it, but now? He was having to work for it. And work very hard indeed. Was there something wrong with his tactics or her understanding? Either way, it looked like he was going to have to change his approach. Somehow.

Gingerblossom's ears flicked as she heard the tom's slight surprise. Most cats would ask what it was about, but Gingerblossom didn't. It's not that she didn't care, it's just that she knew if they wanted to talk about it,
they would. If they didn't they wouldn't. That was just logic in the young warrior's mind.

As Blazingcomet called her pretty again, Gingerblossom got a little confused. He's already complimented me.... Her confusion instantly melted though. He's just SUCH a nice cat! The pale-colored warrior purred kindly,
showing her gratitude through her facial expressions. She did this often,
because she herself didn't like to repeat things she already said. So she would just show thanks through kind smiles and purrs. At this moment, that's what she was doing.

When the tom brushed up against her, Gingerblossom's face changed for a split-second. Her ears twitched, her eyes clouded over, and her smile grew into a confused grimace. It was gone as fast as it had come though, and the she-cat was smiling once again. I've felt this vibe in the air before.... The she-cat tried to pinpoint where she had felt it. She had felt this before, she was sure of it. Gingerblossom wasn't too good with emotions, but she felt sure that this vibe was a specific trait in certain cats. She now realized though, after having experienced it a few times, that they seemed to want something from her. What? What do I need to give them to make them happy? Gingerblossom wanted to know. Maybe, if she got to know Blazingcomet better, he might tell her what he wanted.

The gray-and-ginger warrior decided in her mind that it was okay to touch the tom now. He touched me, so I guess that must mean I can touch him now? This was another rule the female lived by. She shouldn't do anything to a cat unless they've done it to her before.

So, Gingerblossom turned her head and nudged Blazingcomet's shoulder playfully. "How about a race to the top of that tree?" She asked, pointing to a tree four trees away with her tail. "I bet you can do it, you look strong. And don't worry about me, I live to climb trees." And make others happy. Gingerblossom didn't voice that comment, but she supposed that most cats knew that by now.

The young warrior dug her claws into the bark, readying herself in a jumping position. "So Blazingcomet? What do you say?" She put an emphasis on the "z" in his name, as that made it sound quite nice to her. The sunlight showing through the trees was striking her fur, making it a dappled mess of gray, white, and ginger. Her mint-green eyes shone with happiness and excitment though, and the flower in her fur was glowing a golden color in the sunlight. If Gingerblossom was even a bit self-centered, she would realize the full truthfulness of her beauty, even though she kept her fur a mess all the time.

[lone]

Originally Posted by RedHead

Gingerblossom's ears flicked as she heard the tom's slight surprise. Most cats would ask what it was about, but Gingerblossom didn't. It's not that she didn't care, it's just that she knew if they wanted to talk about it,

they would. If they didn't they wouldn't. That was just logic in the young warrior's mind.

As Blazingcomet called her pretty again, Gingerblossom got a little confused. He's already complimented me.... Her confusion instantly melted though. He's just SUCH a nice cat! The pale-colored warrior purred kindly,
showing her gratitude through her facial expressions. She did this often,
because she herself didn't like to repeat things she already said. So she would just show thanks through kind smiles and purrs. At this moment, that's what she was doing.

When the tom brushed up against her, Gingerblossom's face changed for a split-second. Her ears twitched, her eyes clouded over, and her smile grew into a confused grimace. It was gone as fast as it had come though, and the she-cat was smiling once again. I've felt this vibe in the air before.... The she-cat tried to pinpoint where she had felt it. She had felt this before, she was sure of it. Gingerblossom wasn't too good with emotions, but she felt sure that this vibe was a specific trait in certain cats. She now realized though, after having experienced it a few times, that they seemed to want something from her. What? What do I need to give them to make them happy? Gingerblossom wanted to know. Maybe, if she got to know Blazingcomet better, he might tell her what he wanted.

The gray-and-ginger warrior decided in her mind that it was okay to touch the tom now. He touched me, so I guess that must mean I can touch him now? This was another rule the female lived by. She shouldn't do anything to a cat unless they've done it to her before.

So, Gingerblossom turned her head and nudged Blazingcomet's shoulder playfully. "How about a race to the top of that tree?" She asked, pointing to a tree four trees away with her tail. "I bet you can do it, you look strong. And don't worry about me, I live to climb trees." And make others happy. Gingerblossom didn't voice that comment, but she supposed that most cats knew that by now.

The young warrior dug her claws into the bark, readying herself in a jumping position. "So Blazingcomet? What do you say?" She put an emphasis on the "z" in his name, as that made it sound quite nice to her. The sunlight showing through the trees was striking her fur, making it a dappled mess of gray, white, and ginger. Her mint-green eyes shone with happiness and excitment though, and the flower in her fur was glowing a golden color in the sunlight. If Gingerblossom was even a bit self-centered, she would realize the full truthfulness of her beauty, even though she kept her fur a mess all the time.

Confusion was thick in Blazingcomet's expression. How... she didn't... what? How was she not understanding him right now? Okay. You can do this. You've dealt with hard to get cats before. All you have to do is show them you mean it. A sigh escaped Blazingcomet's maw as he thought about how best to do this. It was too early to just tell her 'I like you, wanna go out' and besides, those were words Blazingcomet used only when he already had a cat hooked. She wasn't even looking at his bait! But, the orange tom was always up to a challenge. He could get her padding in circles around him and asking for more. It was just a matter of a very, very long period of time. That and lots, and lots of very, very strong patience.
Good thing Blazingcomet had had some practice, otherwise he might just give up and get out, as quickly as he could. That would make the most sense at this point. Awe, but she's so cute! He thought with a purr, looking at the smiling feline. Most of the time he gave up the innocent ones. It was considered stupidity, but Blazingcomet? He thought it was absolutely precious, the most attractive thing he had seen in a long, long time. And he used to think hard to get was fun. Innocent was like that, but without the insults and constant 'stop flirting with me!' comments. He could definitely do without those, they tended to bother him quite a bit.
The jealousy game might work here. At least get her the slightest bit interested, then move on? That could definitely work. Upon hearing her comment, the tom sighed. It looked like the only sort of relationship Gingerblossom was interested in was a friendly one. Ouch. It did sting his pride a little, but the orange tom would get over it; he always did. "Well... alright. But I do have to warn you, I tend to get pretty competitive." Too bad he wasn't racing someone else, he might be able to impress her. Her?! His thoughts seemed to be scoffing at him, and for a moment, Blazingcomet realized that he probably sounded crazy. The she cat didn't seem like the impressible type. More of the type that would be showing him how to do something.
But not brag about it afterwards! "On your mark... get set..." Maybe he would take it easy on her. It could be interesting! Then again, she looked pretty determined. He'd go fast, then slow down if he thought losing would upset her. Competitiveness was strong in Blazingcomet's nature, and he hoped that it wouldn't act up right now. "Go!" With that one word, the tom half leapt, half climbed down the tree, leaving claw markings on the bark. He didn't even look back to see if Gingerblossom was alright; though in hindsight, he should have. Perhaps a gentlemanly approach was what this she cat needed. Darting towards the tree, he braced himself for either an angry or admiring she cat.

[RedHead]

Originally Posted by Lonestar23

Confusion was thick in Blazingcomet's expression. How... she didn't... what? How was she not understanding him right now? Okay. You can do this. You've dealt with hard to get cats before. All you have to do is show them you mean it. A sigh escaped Blazingcomet's maw as he thought about how best to do this. It was too early to just tell her 'I like you, wanna go out' and besides, those were words Blazingcomet used only when he already had a cat hooked. She wasn't even looking at his bait! But, the orange tom was always up to a challenge. He could get her padding in circles around him and asking for more. It was just a matter of a very, very long period of time. That and lots, and lots of very, very strong patience.
Good thing Blazingcomet had had some practice, otherwise he might just give up and get out, as quickly as he could. That would make the most sense at this point. Awe, but she's so cute! He thought with a purr, looking at the smiling feline. Most of the time he gave up the innocent ones. It was considered stupidity, but Blazingcomet? He thought it was absolutely precious, the most attractive thing he had seen in a long, long time. And he used to think hard to get was fun. Innocent was like that, but without the insults and constant 'stop flirting with me!' comments. He could definitely do without those, they tended to bother him quite a bit.
The jealousy game might work here. At least get her the slightest bit interested, then move on? That could definitely work. Upon hearing her comment, the tom sighed. It looked like the only sort of relationship Gingerblossom was interested in was a friendly one. Ouch. It did sting his pride a little, but the orange tom would get over it; he always did. "Well... alright. But I do have to warn you, I tend to get pretty competitive." Too bad he wasn't racing someone else, he might be able to impress her. Her?! His thoughts seemed to be scoffing at him, and for a moment, Blazingcomet realized that he probably sounded crazy. The she cat didn't seem like the impressible type. More of the type that would be showing him how to do something.
But not brag about it afterwards! "On your mark... get set..." Maybe he would take it easy on her. It could be interesting! Then again, she looked pretty determined. He'd go fast, then slow down if he thought losing would upset her. Competitiveness was strong in Blazingcomet's nature, and he hoped that it wouldn't act up right now. "Go!" With that one word, the tom half leapt, half climbed down the tree, leaving claw markings on the bark. He didn't even look back to see if Gingerblossom was alright; though in hindsight, he should have. Perhaps a gentlemanly approach was what this she cat needed. Darting towards the tree, he braced himself for either an angry or admiring she cat.

Gingerblossom was glad that Blazingcomet had agreed to her friendly little game. She did not, I repeat, DID NOT want to make him angry. She never wanted to make any cat angry, or offended, or sad. She still sensed that vibe in the air, and decided to try and find some time later in her day to ponder deeply about it. For now, she had to focus on what she was doing at this moment with Blazingcomet, as not to waste time. She hated having her mind on other things while she was supposed to be focusing on others. Great Starclan Gingerblossom! Stop being so selfish! The she-cat scolded herself.

As Blazingcomet made a statement about his competitiveness, Gingerblossom simply cocked her head, slight confusion running through her mind. "Competitive" was a pretty foreign word to the warrior, and she had to scour her brain to see if she could find the right definition on what it means. That's right. An unfriendly game. That was as close as Ginger would get to knowing what the word meant.

At that moment, Gingerblossom realized Blazingcomet was saying the words to start the race. On the word go, the large orange tom had leapt off of the branch, hurtling towards the ground below. The momentum of his jump had caused the branch they were standing on to sway, and it flung Gingerblossom,
who was much smaller in stature, into the air. She twisted and landed neatly on a branch, closer to the tree they were heading for. In a split-second,
she was on the move, quickly leaping from branch to branch like a squirrel.
The pale-furred she-cat could feel exhilaration running through her, as she pushed on quickly to reach the tree. This one one of those times where Gingerblossom's secret competitiveness came out, even though the warrior didn't realize it. There were many of these times when this happened to her,
when she felt something other than pure happiness and kindness.

Gingerblossom reached the tree, and she looked down to see Blazingcomet on the ground. It looked like he had reached the tree a little before her. Her heart was still pumping fast, and she bounded down the tree branches until she reached the lowest one, and hung her head upside down over it to face him,
face to face. "Good job Blazingcomet! You're really fast!" That was also really fun! And thanks for the lift you gave me back there! Gingerblossom smirked a little, cocking her head to the side. Her smirk soon broke away to her normal, bright smile though. Her heart was till pounding, and she sat there,
head hanging upside down, looking at Blazingcomet.

[Brilliance]

Originally Posted by Lonestar23

If you allow that wretched half-sister of yours to plague your mind, then there is something seriously wrong with you. She didn't want Alabasterpaw to be in her head. But, she didn't know how to get the awful feline out. The harsh cruelty of what her beautiful, always noticed, always first place sister had told her before was forever in her head. And, perhaps she was right. Alabasterpaw was better in a lot of ways. If she wasn't, would she be the one who was being fawned over while Asterpaw was pushed to a corner until she was called to help the toms... only for Alabasterpaw to get a second chance?
　
That's when she'd begun warning them. At least they'd had the decency to believe her. And that was why Alabasterpaw had been so angry. At her. But, neither one had ever been able to stay angry at the other for long. Was her sister doing this to get back at her? Or Azulpaw? Or, both. Revenge was something that the blue feline had never really thought about before.
　
Even when her sister had taken Lionpaw.
　
Flirting with him, leading him on, and then ditching him, so broken that he wouldn't so much as look at her... say a single word to her... and left her in the dust, she hadn't thought about revenge. Though looking back she realized how much under her sister's spell she had honestly been. Alabasterpaw couldn't stand anyone else being better then her. Her games were rough. A shudder went down Asterpaw's spine as she envisioned them. She knew the types of games that Alabasterpaw was capable of... or at least, her sister called them games.
　
Asterpaw?
　
Well, she'd describe them more as torture. Mental and physical. Oh no, the white feline had never messed with someone physically before... as far as she knew. Was there something she was missing? Please don't let me be blind again. The she cat thought with a sigh as the tip of her tail twitched. After she had moved over to him, she heard him speak. His words both mended and cracked her heart. But... if his protection consists of what I've seen, then I don't want it. If Alabasterpaw did anything to her... would Bluepaw kill her own sister? And, the question that she was having to face... did she want Alabasterpaw dead?
　
Yes.
　
And no.
　
The she cat didn't deserve to live a happy life. She didn't deserve to live at all. But, buried in all her hidden feelings, where her worries and fears and secrets lay, was care for her sister. Love, even. How was it possible that she still loved the white feline? Because they were family. Nothing... nothing could break that, no matter how hard things might try. Even Alabasterpaw couldn't break the fact that they were family. And that Asterpaw was prepared to go to any length for her sister. Even if the she cat did eventually take away the cat that, at this point, was most important to her. Finally, feeling like she would be able to talk without her voice breaking, without the strain that she was constantly feeling pressing on her chest coming into her voice, Asterpaw spoke again.
　
"You don't have to remind me what she tried to do... believe me, I remember." Well, she thought she was ready, but her voice became softer anyways. More scared. Hurt and fear were the two things she could feel the strongest at this moment. They were choking her from the inside. But, those two things aside, a smile slowly lit up her grey-green hues and previously broken features.
　
"You'd do that even though I tried to push you out of a tree?" She asked, cocking her head to one side before her smile faded and her voice became much less confident. "I-I'm not scared of what she might do to me. She-- she wouldn't hurt me." I'm scared for what else she might do to you. That sounded unsure. And, in the previous moon? Asterpaw's voice would have been much more confident. Sounding as though it were beyond a shadow of a doubt that Alabasterpaw would never hurt her. Now she wasn't so sure. She knew Azulpaw-- and Bluepaw-- were both there, both trying to keep her from getting hurt.
　
Maybe that was why Alabasterpaw was so mad.
　
And, it was an easy fix! She knew it. That thought made her a little happier. Just a few little compliments and she would be fine again, she'd feel like she were on top of the world as Asterpaw remembered seeing her sister always acting. Or was it just that? Who knew. Either way, Alabasterpaw's anger would be gone, and she might even apologize... and then they would be fine! But... did she honestly want her sister to get those compliments? To be rewarded?
　
That's just SELFISH, Asterpaw. What is wrong with you? The blue feline was angry with herself that she wouldn't even tell him this to see if he would want to.
　
"I-I think... maybe... i-if she gets some attention, she'll... she'll calm down. And I know this is going to sound crazy, but..." Her voice trailed off and she sighed. "Maybe, maybe if you-- and Bluepaw-- both go give her some compliments, some attention, she'll calm down."
　
It was just a guess.
　
She knew how much her sister loved to be complimented, though. And she knew that Alabasterpaw generally would calm down if she was payed a few compliments, a flirtatious gesture here and there, and her sister would be as happy as ever. Going back to her 'stupid' self, living in her own world. But, she didn't live in her own world. She lived in the real world, and she hurt real cats.
　
Cats who were very close to Asterpaw. Either emotionally, or... physically. Either way she would do whatever it took to hurt them, to make them feel as pained as Asterpaw supposed she did when she didn't feel like a number one pretty feline.
　
"I do realize what I'm saying. Or... 'hear myself,' by the way." She added as quickly as she could. "But, here's why I'm saying this. Alabasterpaw says she's going to kill you, and then doesn't. I don't know why she was just p-" A pause as the she cat tried to get her thoughts back together, tried to mention the awful attack without feeling like she was a horrible cat.
　
Why did she feel like that?
　
Because with the games she used to play with her sister, everything had always been her fault. No matter what the rules of the game actually were. And the mind games Alabasterpaw used to play on her had added quite a bit to her guilt and her feeling useless. Of course they had. Wasn't that what they were for, to make the secondary player feel as though they were worthless... stupid... everything was their fault? Probably, knowing her sister.
　
"Why she was just playing around like that. I don't know if she even wants to kill, or if she's just interested in seeing you in pain, but if she is j-just interested in that, then she won't stop. She won't ever stop until she's either bored or she 'accidentally' kills you." Cue the faltering of her voice, fading out for just a moment. "Even if you don't want to do that, at least promise me you will fight back against her next time. Like I said, she's a coward. She uses manipulation to get her the upper hand. Call her bluff... she has to know you mean it. And she'll stop." Even if he did get hurt again, at least she would know that he wasn't just allowing her sister to play around.
　
Allowing her sister to try and kill him while he did nothing. Every time that memory showed up, it made her feel awful. She was scared at the same time that what she was asking would end up getting him killed. Again, selfish to ask that he do nothing.
　
Stupid.
　
A stupid thing to do. So she wasn't going to do that. Hopefully her sister wouldn't feel threatened and would believe him if he did call her bluff. That was the hopeful light that she was holding onto, the hope that eventually her sister would realize what she was doing.
　
She knew that Alabasterpaw was broken too.
　
She did things like this because of her brokenness. Having her mother leave her... never knowing her father... ohhh, such a harsh life for the young feline. But she hadn't needed to make herself feel better by putting Asterpaw down, and the blue feline was aware that Alabasterpaw knew it. Knew all of it. She knew she was prettier-- no, more beautiful... and better at flirting... and getting attention... and that she was more charming.
　
And Asterpaw? Average. Didn't get the point of flirting, she could use it, but seriously? She was terrible at getting attention. And charming wasn't a word that would ever be used to describe her. She was... nice, at least. Maybe. And when she was younger she hadn't even been nice, just cared about others' feelings. Well... that was nice, but not when someone first met her. Oh no, depending on how they treated her, she'd turn that treatment right back on them.
　
Even now, she attempted that. It didn't always work the way she hoped, but some of the time it did. Which gave her just the slightest bit of hope for the future... and the present as well. After she had already tripped and fallen, then gotten back up quickly-- not wanting him to worry too much, if at all-- she curled her tail around her paws and huffed slightly. "Yes. I'm the one who needs to be careful." Her voice was serious, but her hues sparked. She knew that he was just trying to look out for her, and she definitely appreciated that.
　
It was nice to have someone... well, besides Bluepaw... worried about her. But still, she didn't want him to worry right now. Right now, his focus needed to be on staying alive. Preferably forever-- well, no one lived forever, but at least for quite a while longer. Forever as long into the future as she could imagine, at any rate. Because that was her definition of forever. There was no guarantee of tomorrow, let alone that long, but Asterpaw could always hope. She'd always had hope.
　
Just a spark at times.
　
Just the slightest of glimmers, and yet it was still there for her even throughout all of this. Somehow Asterpaw had managed to hold onto it and somehow, she knew that she always would. There was no way for her not to. "Don't worry about me. I'm going to be fine... and I hope you know that." Carefully, Asterpaw allowed herself to make eye contact with the tom. Harder for you to say goodbye? Forgetting that they were, in fact, going to go their separate ways at some point, alarm spread through Asterpaw like a wildfire.
　
What did he mean, goodbye? What was going on? What was-- oh. Remembering seemed to send her spiraling back down to earth where her head had been in the clouds just moments before. She would be fine no matter what. She would survive. Learn to adapt, learn to deal with it. And, as long as she knew that he was safe... as long as she knew that he would live for a longer amount of time, perhaps find another cat who he would be able to play with as the two of them had done, well, she would be happy. When she thought of that at least. Happy and, though she didn't like the thought of it, jealous.
　
Jealousy bothered the blue feline. Jealousy, and anger, and hatred had sparked all of this. Those three feelings? Emotions? Whatever they were, they were now among the things she disliked most. Not hated. She didn't want to hate now, she was.... afraid to. Afraid it would drive her to the desperate measures it had driven her sister and previous friend.
　
Were they still friends?
　
One sided, at least-- just like their relationship. All one sided. And, as much as she hated to admit it, she might hate him. She strongly disliked him, at least. Very strongly. Strongly enough to the point where she might have been willing to say that she hated him, had she not been in Azulpaw's presence at that moment. If they kill me, so be it, but I can't say goodbye to you, Asterpaw. So... what-- what did that mean? He wasn't going to leave? He wouldn't... he would stay, even though it meant he could die? The ultimate sacrifice, Asterpaw had always been told.
　
She hadn't believed it before. Weren't there worse things? Technically yes. But she did not believe that he deserved to die. If they were going to kill him, they would be taking the life of a cat that had done nothing wrong. Nothing! So then, why? She still didn't understand how much jealousy, or anger, or hatred, or all three went into this. If it was all three, then... again, the feline wouldn't understand why.What kind of cat would hate/be angry with/be jealous of another so much that they would go to the extreme of taking their life? Taking it and making sure that they were dead for good.
　
Asterpaw had heard stories of cats coming back... whispered rumours around the clearing, and she didn't know if they were just rumours or something else entirely. Could there be a whisper of truth in those whispered rumors? No. Definitely not. If you were dead... you were dead. For good, that was it. "I can't say goodbye to you either..." Her voice was whispered, hushed, and she looked as though she were about to cry for a moment before she cleared her throat again and her voice became more playful. "So, no dying, okay? You're not allowed to. Okay? Okay. Glad you agree with me." And that was it, in her mind. He wasn't allowed to die.
　
He couldn't die.
　
Because she couldn't stand to have to say goodbye... not now, and not ever. She doubted she'd ever get any better at saying goodbyes.As annoying as that seemed, what other choice did she have but to make sure she didn't have to? Though she was saying goodbye to her close knit relationship with her sister. With Nightpaw. She'd said goodbye to Lionpaw. Not... to Bluepaw. Not quite yet. And she didn't know when she would be ready, but she was pretty confident it would be sometime soon.
　
It was time to end this once and for all. Make sure he knew that even if he were to snuff Azulpaw's life out, there was no way that she would be able to be with him. Breaking her word. She was going to break her word. Ugh, she hated the thought of that. It was better then the alternative, however, and that was the truth that she kept holding onto to keep her from backing out. His next words surprised her, and made her feel as though it would be ten times harder to let him go now. Eventually it would happen. If this carried on? It was only a matter of time, and she knew it, and she wondered if he did.
　
A heartbreak either way was the only way to stop this. She could go and be with Bluepaw. Cut off contact and break her own heart.... and from what he was telling her now, break his in the process. Or he would die. She bit her lip, trying to figure out if a lifetime of misery or a day of being with a friend was better. Safety and security had always been important to her. In the end, she supposed it was his choice... whatever he wanted, she would follow.
　
It was the only thing she had to give... her word.
　
It was the only thing of worth that she owned. The only thing that she would ever own. So, she had decided that it was better to realize this then to try and push it aside, risking the thought that she might turn into Alabasterpaw, thinking she was worth nothing more then appearance and toms.
　
Was she doing that now? No... she wasn't! That wasn't why Alabasterpaw was better then her! It couldn't be the only reason. There had to be others. Charm, for one thing. And... her attitude was better. She... got more attention? Was that it, besides pretty looks?
　
That couldn't be it. When he was finished speaking she held her breath for a moment and then carefully-- like she was scared to at all, like she normally was with contact-- she reached out her own paw and put it on top of his.
　
He was her north star.
　
The north star, Alabasterpaw had always told her-- her mother was from kittypet roots-- was something that had pointed 'sailors' home. Whatever sailors were. They used it to guide and direct them, and it was a source of comfort because they would follow it and no matter where they were, it would lead them back home. So Azulpaw was the north star in her life, and Alabasterpaw? It would seem the white feline didn't have one. What a surprise. Nothing guiding her back, she was just... drifting.
　
"You're my north star." Her voice was quiet, gentle, and she hoped he would understand.
　
It might sound like she was just babbling. North star? What does that mean, has she gone crazy? She could almost hear him thinking.
　
But, she would know. She would know that he was her guiding force, her north star... very important to her. She owed him everything. Everything she had. Which was just her word, and her trust... loyalty... and yes, love.
　
She loved him.
　
In a platonic way, but it was still there, and as far as she knew? It could continue to grow. It might. If it did she would have to be ready, and if it didn't, well... then she would still have to be just as ready. No matter what happened she'd have to be on her guard for whatever might go right or wrong in life. A moment later she removed her paw and curled her tail more tightly around herself. This had definitely become a barrier, a guard for her... a crutch. Something to lean on. Something to shut everything else out. She needed to learn to get along without it, but... did she want to?
　
Not really, no.
　
After all... how was she going to lose her tail? It would be weird and uncomfortable and strange if she did, and she would not only be losing her tail, but her security crutch along with it. Upon hearing his next words, a flash of alarm passed across her features. How can you forgive her? She wanted to ask, but she couldn't get the words out.
　
"Y-you... you... forgive her?" She asked, her voice scared and small.
　
Forgiveness was a strong thing to give Alabasterpaw. Even she was still working on forgiving the she cat. But, Azulpaw had somehow already forgiven her. And of course he wouldn't trust her. She wouldn't either. She would always be on guard around the feline now, wondering of her sister's true intentions. False or kind. Either way, she would be watching her back. Cautiously, she moved over to be beside him and gingerly rested her head on his shoulder. Thank you for being there for me. Thank you for understanding. Thank you for being my friend. Thank you for everything. All of those things were things she wanted to say, but when she opened her maw, only one came out:
　
"Thank you for being my north star."

Azulpaw still stood by what he said, as he eyed her with a stern look. His fur was ragged, and he supposed that he should get it looked after, and clean it for himself. It was never ideal for him to pad around with dirty grey fur. His especially since his fur had color. Now, if he were a black cat, that would had been different. Other cats hardly knew if theirs was dirty or not--the tom had sigh. It was not the time to think about his own faults. Right now, he felt calm. A brooding storm that loomed over them, passed, and once again he knew why Asterpaw flt guarded. The only thing he could not bring himself to was the fact that she was comparing him to these other cats, these other toms that had left her to be with her ragged sister, Alabasterpaw! Azulpaw would never find himself intertwining with the she-devil. Not for as long as he lived. He felt that she was asking him to do too much, even though Asterpaw only asked him to do one simple thing. ‘’Why should I?’’ He felt that he was choking on his own words, ‘’Oh, I’ll compliment her alright.’’ He says, rolling his yellow eyes, and giving a lopsided grin that turned into a smirk. ‘’I’ll give her all the compliments she dreams of. Trust me, I can keep her at bay.’’ His voice was edgy, almost flirty-like, but he cleared his throat before he made himself seem awkward.

‘’I think you need to stop worrying about me.’’ He says, deadpanned. His tone was serious, and his eyes shone that he appreciated her caring for him, but he felt useless--more than he already was. Sure, Alabasterpaw had knocked him around a few times, but that was because he allowed her to do so. Foremost, Azulpaw could never see anyone laying a paw on Asterpaw. The way her sister did that moon ago, haunted him. The way he just stood there, couldn’t even do anything to stop the greedy beast. Azulpaw was worried for her, even though countless times he knew that kinship ran deeply, and Alabasterpaw wouldn’t want to hurt her sister, even if she tried. The tom wished friendships worked that way. But, they did not. He was positive that Bluepaw would kill him without a second glance because they weren’t kin. They were only friends, and Azulpaw was sure that the two weren’t even that anymore!

The tom wondered what the piebald tom was up to. And, where was Silverpaw? Unconsciously, he felt his claws sheathing and unsheathing knowing that Silverpaw was not around, her scent becoming faint. One thing he did know was that she wasn’t alone. She had to be with someone, and he hoped it wasn’t with that black furball. Of course, Silverpaw wouldn’t go off with that poor excuse of a tom. She was most likely with the ginger tom--the other one. What was his name again? Foxpaw, right. Azulpaw knew little of him, but he was okay with the ginger’s presence. The only thing he did not like was his flirtatious personality. The fact that he brushed himself along every female he walked past. Azulpaw shook his pelt. He knew that Silverpaw was a sweet, intellectual cat that paid no heed to the other tom apprentices within Skyclan. The naive, pretty bengal was too caught up with her head in the clouds!

Having that thought in his mind, wanting to believe that she was safe, Azulpaw flicked his ears towards Asterpaw. ‘’It’s good to know, sweetheart.’’ He lashed his tail once, and looked past Asterpaw’s shoulder. Nothing was there. ‘’Next time I have a date with your sister, I’ll remember her power of manipulation--thanks for warning me!” He mewed, clearly sarcastically, but an affectionate sarcasm that emitted a purr. He knew it wasn’t a joke when it came to dealing with the white demon--but she was...clearly, a joke herself. Oh, how rude he must have been! A pretty joke...there, that was one compliment for her. Purring once more, the tom added, ‘’I would still do it even if you didn’t push me out of a tree! Perhaps, a large rock? A mountain? Roll me down a hill? I’m always up to being pushed down something!’’ He gently nudged her with a paw, chuckling softly.

Ah, pain...that was never a satisfying thing. Never did he wish to go through it, but pain happened all the time. And, he had embraced it, like tomorrow was coming. Instead of thinking on its cruelty, the tom liked to push on the exhilaration it held. ‘’I’m serious, Asterpaw. Be careful.’’ He says, glancing down at her paw. ‘’Please, don’t destroy yourself. I’m going to be bored when you’re gone, and I won’t have anyone to annoy, and boast about how awesome I am!’’ His voice was heavy, and soon lightened up as he joked. He puffed out his chest to prove his confidence level, before sinking down again and feeling smaller than the rest of the world.

As he sunk down as low as he could, he looked at the female, his companion for the moment, his eyes roaming over her pelt. As he heard her before, a haunting look came onto his features, and he blinked his eyes to rid the emotion, before saying, ‘’A lot can change, Asterpaw, and we don’t know what those two are capable of. Basically, it’s my fault that they’re like this anyway.’’ His fault. His big mouth’s fault for offending them, for talking too much, or too vague. If he hadn’t, Azulpaw believed he would had been able to save Bluepaw to become that naive basic charmer that he was. That was who Azulpaw missed dearly at the moment, and even though Asterpaw wasn’t the company he truly needed, he knew that the blue cat was first place in his life. Aside from Silverpaw, evidently. And, Azulpaw was positive that Bluepaw would also be apart of his life for a long while. Eternally, maybe.

‘’Everyone has a stopping point,’’ the tom gets up, cautiously, blinking his eyes towards Asterpaw. From the tone of her voice, he could tell that she really cared, and he was highly grateful for that. She cared about him--really cared about him. Azulpaw slowly nodded, ‘’I don’t think I can fight back in this condition--I don’t even know if I’ll be able to fight a she cat, anyway.’’ Believe it or not, this feline had a great deal of respect for she cats, even if his own mother hardly paid attention to him. He noted that they were pretty little delicate things with a fiery attitude, and a determination like no other. A drive that goes on for countless days! Turning his eyes to stare at Asterpaw, he pondered whether she would grow up to be a strong she cat. She already had the attitude, that made him roll his eyes.

‘’I’ll look after myself.’’ He tells her. ‘’And, besides. What’s done in the dark eventually comes to the light. I’m sure Alabasterpaw--and Bluepaw will receive a good punishment, and I would be served the justice I longed for.’’ Oh, how he longed for the justice of knowing his new enemies would be taken care of, but how long would it be before they’re caught? Will they finally be caught while he’s looking down at his earthly pelt, and the sadness in his eyes? Or, would they be caught to the point where he’s badly injured; on the verge of death? If he were lucky, the two would be caught before any damage is inflicted upon either of them. Either way, he was sure that they would be caught. And, Azulpaw could live his life in peace without the fear of someone wanting him dead.

At her next words, the tom had froze to his spot. How was he suppose to say this without sounding too weak? Azulpaw was tired of being known as a weak link, but what she wanted him to promise was too much for him. His shoulders had tensed, ‘’Asterpaw,’’ he began, then paused to think before closing his eyes and saying, ‘’I can’t promise that. No matter what she’s your sister--half-sister, whatever. She’s your kin.’’ The tom stared at his paws, heaving in a deep sigh. ‘’I can’t hurt anyone who you love. And, I know you have a feeling of hate towards her, but that feeling will past if I fight back.’’ Azulpaw looked back into her hues, his yellow eyes hesitant for a moment, ‘’Face it, Asterpaw. If you seen one of us dangling from a ledge--which one would you save?’’ He already knew the answer. From his prime time as a kit, he would hear the gossip and chatter of the elders, and he remembered one of them, vividly saying, No matter what, you die for your kin. Family is important. And, Azulpaw knew that was true. He just found it unfair that he hardly had any kin he could die for. So, he chose his friends, the closest kin he would have. For the rest of his life, probably. Well, not probably. Maybe if he decided to take in a mate and have kits, but that was a long way off, and Azulpaw feared that he wouldn’t be ready to do...any of that.

The tom felt good. He knew that Asterpaw was good at taking care of herself, but Azulpaw would keep an extra eye on her just in case. As he glanced down at her leg once more, he feared that she had made herself her own worst enemy. Her paw was caked with blood, and limping on, and Azulpaw urged himself to not burst out at her, and yelling at her, and calling her stupid for doing such a thing. Then, she would rebuttal that he pushed himself out a tree. When really he hadn’t. As he was climbing the tree, he had slipped, making his body slip into more pain. It wasn’t a move he wanted to do, but his pain was numbed as the feelings inside him were.

There was nothing that he could do to change the past, and it was a pity that he could do nothing to change what happened. He drew his attention away from her leg, not wanting her to feel uncomfortable at his gaze. He felt his ears flatten at hearing her whisper, and perked at her next words. He gave her a smirk,’’I’ll try not to die, oh great one.’’ He teased, his eyes lighting up in mischief.

Then, clouded over into sadness. He didn’t know what the future might bring, or what might happen between them, but he only prayed to Starclan that everything good would happen. Haven’t they had enough heartbreak? What more could others want? Azulpaw had nothing to give. Want his life? Take it. The tom was exhausted, and frankly, he didn’t allow himself to care anymore. He only cared because of Silverpaw. He only cared because of Asterpaw.

He tensed up, feeling a jolt enter into him as he felt Asterpaw’s paw on top of his own. He looked up at her, his ears twitching. Was she touching him? On her own? He would had gasped and teased her, but this was a serious moment, so he kept his maw shut until he heard her words stumbling out.

North star?

What was she talking about?

Azulpaw looked up towards the sky. It wasn’t completely dark, so the stars weren’t out at the moment. ‘’North star?’’ He mewed, sitting down, and eyeing her confusingly. Then, it dawned on him as to what she meant. ‘’You’re calling me your home?’’ He purred, amused. One thing he did know was that North star was a compass. A guidance. A map to home.

Jokingly, he added, ‘’So, what would that make you to me? My South star?’’ He says, his voice on an eager note. It felt weird that being someone’s north star, but he liked the ring of it. He liked that Asterpaw called him that, and he could feel the hair on his pelt’s pick from the excitement.

As she asked her other question, the tom settled into a serious state. He blinked at her once more, unmoving. Then, slowly, he nodded. ‘’Yes...I do forgive Alabasterpaw. I also forgive Bluepaw. I don’t want to go through life having a grudge built up against the two for what they have done to me. It’s not how a warrior behaves.’’ He tells her, proudly. Then, he relaxed his shoulders, and said, ‘’I don’t want to be a bitter cat. I know I’m not the most friendly of cats when first meeting me--and, trust me, I have a lot to be bitter about, but I can’t allow the past to control what is happening now. It took me a long time to learn that. And, I bet you won’t be able to guess who taught me?’’ He raised his tail above his head, and quickly answered before she could throw out names. ‘’That’s right!...Silverpaw.’’ Surprise, surprise it had been to him. He figured his ‘’wise lessons’’ and ‘’lectures’’ had rubbed off on her, but she always seem to be his sunlight on a gloomy grey cloudy day.

Once that was said and done, Azulpaw felt another wave of tense coming upon him as Asterpaw rested herself against him. Again, he was surprised. Shell shocked, even, but he stayed there, slowly letting his guard down as he relaxed himself. Limply, he moved his tail around her, only having it brush along her back. The silence was good. The moment was good. And, good moments always had to find a way to be ruined, as annoying as that seemed. At hearing her voice again, Azulpaw felt a shudder flow through him.

What would happen if he couldn’t be her North star for long? What if he was forced to say goodbye to her, and she would never find herself at home? At peace again? These thoughts swirled around his head, making him angry and sad at the same time, but he couldn’t worry about them. Right now, he was in the present. The past made you bitter. The future made you worry. The presence was a gift, so soak in the moment while you were in it.

Azulpaw sighed, and he turned his muzzle once to graze Asterpaw’s ear. ‘’Of course, South star.’’ The tom knew it wasn’t a such thing as a South star, but he liked to think it were. Just because he had the honor of calling her it. And, for some odd reason...it fit just right.

[lone]

Originally Posted by RedHead

Gingerblossom was glad that Blazingcomet had agreed to her friendly little game. She did not, I repeat, DID NOT want to make him angry. She never wanted to make any cat angry, or offended, or sad. She still sensed that vibe in the air, and decided to try and find some time later in her day to ponder deeply about it. For now, she had to focus on what she was doing at this moment with Blazingcomet, as not to waste time. She hated having her mind on other things while she was supposed to be focusing on others. Great Starclan Gingerblossom! Stop being so selfish! The she-cat scolded herself.

As Blazingcomet made a statement about his competitiveness, Gingerblossom simply cocked her head, slight confusion running through her mind. "Competitive" was a pretty foreign word to the warrior, and she had to scour her brain to see if she could find the right definition on what it means. That's right. An unfriendly game. That was as close as Ginger would get to knowing what the word meant.

At that moment, Gingerblossom realized Blazingcomet was saying the words to start the race. On the word go, the large orange tom had leapt off of the branch, hurtling towards the ground below. The momentum of his jump had caused the branch they were standing on to sway, and it flung Gingerblossom,
who was much smaller in stature, into the air. She twisted and landed neatly on a branch, closer to the tree they were heading for. In a split-second,
she was on the move, quickly leaping from branch to branch like a squirrel.
The pale-furred she-cat could feel exhilaration running through her, as she pushed on quickly to reach the tree. This one one of those times where Gingerblossom's secret competitiveness came out, even though the warrior didn't realize it. There were many of these times when this happened to her,
when she felt something other than pure happiness and kindness.

Gingerblossom reached the tree, and she looked down to see Blazingcomet on the ground. It looked like he had reached the tree a little before her. Her heart was still pumping fast, and she bounded down the tree branches until she reached the lowest one, and hung her head upside down over it to face him,
face to face. "Good job Blazingcomet! You're really fast!" That was also really fun! And thanks for the lift you gave me back there! Gingerblossom smirked a little, cocking her head to the side. Her smirk soon broke away to her normal, bright smile though. Her heart was till pounding, and she sat there,

head hanging upside down, looking at Blazingcomet.

Blazingcomet had almost completely forgotten who he was racing. Or, that he was racing at all. It was just him and the sky and the ground. Trees seemed to be flying past him, or was it the other way around? Who knew. All Blazingcomet knew was that he was doing what he loved, and he was barely aware as he reached the tree. As a matter of fact, he almost ran past it before he realized what he was doing. How embarassing would that have been? Oh, pretty embarassing, in the tom's opinion. After all, it wasn't everyone who would just blindly... run right by a tree. Not everyone, just Blazingcomet. Because he got way, way too caught up in the moment. And that moment had given him a thrill that he wasn't likely to be forgetting... anytime soon, anyways.
Huh? The orange tom thought, starting as the she cat glanced down at him from her branch. O-kay... well. She seemed to like to climb. But that was nothing more then opinion and observation, perhaps she really hated it and was trying to get over her fear. If there was one thing that the tom had learned, it was not to make assumptions. Assumptions led to guessing games and while Blazingcomet loved a good guessing game, he didn't like to be on the guessing side. Looked like it was time to put a little pressure on this sweetheart. Turn her into a diamond. His diamond. See, the tom had some faults... he wasn't really greedy, though.
Maybe. Possibly. At least he didn't think of himself that way. Well, he wasn't! Not really, not truly, not... necessarily. "Oh, thank you!" He purred genuinely, glad she wasn't upset. Then again, he hadn't really expected her to be. He wasn't sure if he would be more surprised that she seemed so eager, or more surprised if she had been angry? Probably angry. Because this cat just didn't seem like the type to get jealous, mad, or anything else, for that matter. She was just an all around sweetheart, wasn't she? At least she seemed to be. But, again, Blazingcomet was going to have to be careful with the assumptions he was making. It could offend her. Perhaps she was really a manipulative, scheming-- what was he thinking? Forget assumptions.
It was pretty obvious she was a sweet cat. And if that was what she wanted him to think well, then, she was doing a good job of portraying it. "And you're welcome for the lift." Perhaps he should be apologizing instead. Had he known what she had meant, perhaps he would of. But since she was thanking him, and sounded genuine enough, he supposed that was his cue to act super happy and upbeat. Wasn't it? Or was he wrong? "Say, sweetheart... would you want to go out sometime?" There was no doubting the honey-coated purr in his voice. Definitely faked. But, faked so well that it sounded just like his real one, only much sweeter. Would she get what he meant? Or was she going to brush him off as she had been doing?
　
If so... looked like it was time to make this sweetheart a nice shade of envy.