September Gathering

[Fuzzy]

Originally Posted by BILL.

It was nice to not have much going on this gathering. Sure, ShadowClan was without leadership, but that was a small price to pay after all the drama the last Gatherings had. Besides, it wasn't really RiverClan's problem. As long as ShadowClan kept their head down and didn't agitate Fallenstar or Lionstorm, things would be fine.

Probably.

Ears twitching, Thistlestep glanced over his shoulder at Violetpaw, the young feline unfortunately assigned to him. He was sure she was a fine cat, it was just.. he had enjoyed the time without an apprentice. It felt ripped from him too soon.

"Violetpaw," he spoke her name quietly. "Perhaps it'd be best for you to socialize with cats your age? You can get to know the other Clans more." And not sit beside him. That sounded good to him.
@Fuzzyfeline

Violetpaw wasn't enjoying the sheer amount of cats at this gathering. Where they all this big? She didn't think that there where that many cat in the other Clans. Yeah there was a lot in RiverClan since SkyClan joined but she didn't think there where this many cats.
Being party lost in observing the cats around her the tabby almost missed her mentors words. "What?" Violetpaw sounded in disbelief. "You want me to go hang out with a bunch of strangers? Why would I want to do that?" The molly inquired her tail twitching. Thistlestep must be crazy to think she'd just go hang out with random apprentices. "I can learn enough about the Clans from here, it's not like cats are quite enough you can't hear them." Violet added with a small huff.

[Fawn]

Originally Posted by Lonestar23

Amberpaw had chosen to sit near the edge of Seastones so she could converse with another cat without disturbing the others. It had been a good plan, she thought, in the few minutes she'd come up with it while she was on the way here. The problem was, no one seemed to want to sit this far out. She almost felt bad, like she was being disrespectful, and was about to move toward the front when something - or someone, rather - caught her eye. "Fawnpaw?" It hadn't been a long time since she'd last seen him, but long enough that she was pleasantly surprised.

"I thought you'd be up at the front, listening to Lionstorm, or..." Her voice trailed off as she caught sight of how nervous he looked. A shadow came over Amberpaw's face as she tried to bring something, anything to mind as to what could've happened. Giving up after a few minutes of dead silence, she abandoned her position from a few feet away in favor of one where she could lightly brush her tail against his in (what she hoped was) a soothing gesture.

"Are you okay? Did something happen to you?"

A semi-startled hum escaped Fawnpaw as he heard his name, then was twisting his head every-which-direction to attempt to locate the source through scanning eyes. And when he found it, pupils widened with his inhale. "Oh, wow-- hey. I... didn't know you were here, Amberpaw." He didn't recall seeing her until now, as if she'd materialized from thin air to join his moment of solitude.

Expression softening, he laughed a little albeit without much joy, distantly relieved to be away from the fight about to happen, and Amberpaw's company was always appreciated. "I haven't been paying attention, to be honest.. Um, has he been talking a lot again?" he asked, briefly flicking his eyes toward the leaders and deputies. "Because that's usually... not a great sign..." Fawnpaw's jaw tightened under her scrutiny, only deflating again when she settled beside him and somehow, that gesture was crumbling his exterior. "Yeah, it's not that important. Just..." Fawnpaw didn't know how to begin to describe it. "I think I might've, maybe, started an argument?"

[lone]

Originally Posted by Dipper

A semi-startled hum escaped Fawnpaw as he heard his name, then was twisting his head every-which-direction to attempt to locate the source through scanning eyes. And when he found it, pupils widened with his inhale. "Oh, wow-- hey. I... didn't know you were here, Amberpaw." He didn't recall seeing her until now, as if she'd materialized from thin air to join his moment of solitude.

Expression softening, he laughed a little albeit without much joy, distantly relieved to be away from the fight about to happen, and Amberpaw's company was always appreciated. "I haven't been paying attention, to be honest.. Um, has he been talking a lot again?" he asked, briefly flicking his eyes toward the leaders and deputies. "Because that's usually... not a great sign..." Fawnpaw's jaw tightened under her scrutiny, only deflating again when she settled beside him and somehow, that gesture was crumbling his exterior. "Yeah, it's not that important. Just..." Fawnpaw didn't know how to begin to describe it. "I think I might've, maybe, started an argument?"

"Your guess is as good as mine. I haven't been able to hear very well," She mewed with a slight shrug. "I wanted to sit back here and talk to... well, whoever was back here with me, so we wouldn't disturb everyone else, but as you can see, there aren't many opportunities for conversation." She giggled a little at that, composing herself a moment later. There will be other Gatherings, Amberpaw reminded herself. Next time, she wouldn't choose to sit back here. She would've moved now, but she was more than content to stay and talk to Fawnpaw; he seemed like he needed a friend, anyways.

Concern flooded Amberpaw's gaze, mingling with the confusion already there. She couldn't picture Fawnpaw starting an argument. He didn't seem like the type of cat to get involved in a lot of drama in the first place, and... he definitely didn't seem like one to go around starting arguments. "Are... you sure? What happened?" All fragments of sensitivity seemed to exit her mind, and once she had regained them, she quickly followed her questions up with a more understanding response. "Actually, it - it's not that important. You're a good cat, Fawnpaw, I know you wouldn't intentionally hurt anyone."

[Fawn]

Originally Posted by Lonestar23

"Your guess is as good as mine. I haven't been able to hear very well," She mewed with a slight shrug. "I wanted to sit back here and talk to... well, whoever was back here with me, so we wouldn't disturb everyone else, but as you can see, there aren't many opportunities for conversation." She giggled a little at that, composing herself a moment later. There will be other Gatherings, Amberpaw reminded herself. Next time, she wouldn't choose to sit back here. She would've moved now, but she was more than content to stay and talk to Fawnpaw; he seemed like he needed a friend, anyways.

Concern flooded Amberpaw's gaze, mingling with the confusion already there. She couldn't picture Fawnpaw starting an argument. He didn't seem like the type of cat to get involved in a lot of drama in the first place, and... he definitely didn't seem like one to go around starting arguments. "Are... you sure? What happened?" All fragments of sensitivity seemed to exit her mind, and once she had regained them, she quickly followed her questions up with a more understanding response. "Actually, it - it's not that important. You're a good cat, Fawnpaw, I know you wouldn't intentionally hurt anyone."

Her explanation prompted him to look around, receiving verification that there weren't many cats around; it was precisely why he'd selected this spot, though he was quizzical of Amberpaw's reasoning. "Wait, you wanted to talk to someone, saw nobody around, and then decided to stay here?" he asked, blinking. Huh. The logic didn't align with his own, but he didn't press the issue when his thoughts were still flashing too fast to hold onto anything more than a minute. Fawnpaw's pupils darted everywhere but on Amberpaw, an uncomfortable cough erupting from him to betray his uneasiness. "It… was nothing, probably over by now anyway." Oh, he could only hope so. "Just a weird situation, I guess." A weird situation for a weird cat, his internal monologue reminded him as he winced.

The reassurance knocked the wind out of him and left him stunned, speechless. Compassion was overwhelming in this moment that he felt too guilty over to even formulate an accurate interpretation of the events. Eventually, he settled on a choked, "I don't know." He knew it had been unintentional this time, but… it hurt. No, not hurt. It was downright gut-wrenching that Amberpaw thought he was so much less morally gray than what was true. Fawnpaw didn't have the heart or words to tell her that she was wrong, so he simply let the silence pool between them — normally, he'd be hyper diligent in breaking it, but this was different.

[lone]

Originally Posted by Dipper

Her explanation prompted him to look around, receiving verification that there weren't many cats around; it was precisely why he'd selected this spot, though he was quizzical of Amberpaw's reasoning. "Wait, you wanted to talk to someone, saw nobody around, and then decided to stay here?" he asked, blinking. Huh. The logic didn't align with his own, but he didn't press the issue when his thoughts were still flashing too fast to hold onto anything more than a minute. Fawnpaw's pupils darted everywhere but on Amberpaw, an uncomfortable cough erupting from him to betray his uneasiness. "It… was nothing, probably over by now anyway." Oh, he could only hope so. "Just a weird situation, I guess." A weird situation for a weird cat, his internal monologue reminded him as he winced.

The reassurance knocked the wind out of him and left him stunned, speechless. Compassion was overwhelming in this moment that he felt too guilty over to even formulate an accurate interpretation of the events. Eventually, he settled on a choked, "I don't know." He knew it had been unintentional this time, but… it hurt. No, not hurt. It was downright gut-wrenching that Amberpaw thought he was so much less morally gray than what was true. Fawnpaw didn't have the heart or words to tell her that she was wrong, so he simply let the silence pool between them — normally, he'd be hyper diligent in breaking it, but this was different.

"I kept thinking someone might show up any second, you know? I kept telling myself 'one more minute' until - well - you showed up." She paused for a moment, then hurried on to a kinder statement. "Which is a good thing, by the way. I like hanging out with you." His answer to her questions didn't exactly reassure her, but Amberpaw reminded herself that no one liked having their business poked into. Leave it alone. Give him the benefit of the doubt. He was a good cat. From every interaction with him, she had to believe that. What reason did she have to believe otherwise?

She couldn't think of anything else to say as silence crept between them, and eventually, moved her tail so it wasn't brushing up against him anymore. Was it her fault? Had she done something wrong, had she... offended him? What did I do? The last thing Amberpaw would've thought was that telling Fawnpaw he was a good cat would upset him. "I'm really sorry," She said meekly, after the silence had become too much for her to handle. She couldn't afford to lose a friend. Amberpaw knew she wouldn't handle that well, no matter how much she might want to. She couldn't think of anyone who would cope well with a friendship ending. She'd never truly argued with anyone before, but if it came down to it, she knew she'd fight to keep Fawnpaw in her life.

[Fawn]

Originally Posted by Lonestar23

"I kept thinking someone might show up any second, you know? I kept telling myself 'one more minute' until - well - you showed up." She paused for a moment, then hurried on to a kinder statement. "Which is a good thing, by the way. I like hanging out with you." His answer to her questions didn't exactly reassure her, but Amberpaw reminded herself that no one liked having their business poked into. Leave it alone. Give him the benefit of the doubt. He was a good cat. From every interaction with him, she had to believe that. What reason did she have to believe otherwise?

She couldn't think of anything else to say as silence crept between them, and eventually, moved her tail so it wasn't brushing up against him anymore. Was it her fault? Had she done something wrong, had she... offended him? What did I do? The last thing Amberpaw would've thought was that telling Fawnpaw he was a good cat would upset him. "I'm really sorry," She said meekly, after the silence had become too much for her to handle. She couldn't afford to lose a friend. Amberpaw knew she wouldn't handle that well, no matter how much she might want to. She couldn't think of anyone who would cope well with a friendship ending. She'd never truly argued with anyone before, but if it came down to it, she knew she'd fight to keep Fawnpaw in her life.

Fawnpaw felt trapped, the walls edging in further. This was bad. There was nowhere left to go but down. Amberpaw would find out about him, feel like their friendship was founded on lies, and a burning question nagged at him: what if he wasn't a good cat? Regrets were paralyzing, none that he could voice and that alone was more fodder to the belief that he was being dishonest in his silence.

However, her apology finally snapped him from his daze enough to return him to the present. Fawnpaw's ears fell back, disarmed. "What—?" he asked, breathless. Finding his footing again, he shook his head quickly to reassure, "N-no, it's … you don't have to apologize— it's not.." With an inhale, he attempted to unscramble his thoughts to say more calmly, "I'm not sure why you're sorry…? You didn't do anything wrong." The absurdity of it formed a mangled, soft laugh in the back of his throat. "I mean, you were being perfectly nice to me and it's just… me, being caught in my thoughts again." Fawnpaw wished he could do better than that, she deserved so much more than a lame attempt of describing his difficulties in expression.

[lone]

Originally Posted by Dipper

Fawnpaw felt trapped, the walls edging in further. This was bad. There was nowhere left to go but down. Amberpaw would find out about him, feel like their friendship was founded on lies, and a burning question nagged at him: what if he wasn't a good cat? Regrets were paralyzing, none that he could voice and that alone was more fodder to the belief that he was being dishonest in his silence.

However, her apology finally snapped him from his daze enough to return him to the present. Fawnpaw's ears fell back, disarmed. "What—?" he asked, breathless. Finding his footing again, he shook his head quickly to reassure, "N-no, it's … you don't have to apologize— it's not.." With an inhale, he attempted to unscramble his thoughts to say more calmly, "I'm not sure why you're sorry…? You didn't do anything wrong." The absurdity of it formed a mangled, soft laugh in the back of his throat. "I mean, you were being perfectly nice to me and it's just… me, being caught in my thoughts again." Fawnpaw wished he could do better than that, she deserved so much more than a lame attempt of describing his difficulties in expression.

Amberpaw had gotten used to being sorry. There were so many things that could be taken the wrong way... too many, in her opinion, but it had never bothered her. There was nothing wrong with apologizing. "Oh." What else was she supposed to say? 'I'm sorry,' again? For what? What am I supposed to be sorry for? Biting back the words, she turned her gaze up to the sky instead. StarClan was supposed to be watching over them, guiding them, right? Especially tonight? Somehow, it didn't feel like they were there at all.

"Look, I don't know what happened, and if you don't want to talk about it, I don't need to know, but I-" She stopped herself, taking a deep, bracing breath before turning to look at him. She wasn't going to avoid this. Head on. Face it head on, Amberpaw. "I need to know you aren't going to cut me off, because you're really important to me, and if I said something dumb I am really sorry because I didn't mean to hurt you at all." If she could've thought of something else to say, she would have. She didn't want to lose a friend. What if I said something wrong again? She'd pushed it too far, hadn't she? Oh no. What did I do?

[Fawn]

Originally Posted by Lonestar23

Amberpaw had gotten used to being sorry. There were so many things that could be taken the wrong way... too many, in her opinion, but it had never bothered her. There was nothing wrong with apologizing. "Oh." What else was she supposed to say? 'I'm sorry,' again? For what? What am I supposed to be sorry for? Biting back the words, she turned her gaze up to the sky instead. StarClan was supposed to be watching over them, guiding them, right? Especially tonight? Somehow, it didn't feel like they were there at all.

"Look, I don't know what happened, and if you don't want to talk about it, I don't need to know, but I-" She stopped herself, taking a deep, bracing breath before turning to look at him. She wasn't going to avoid this. Head on. Face it head on, Amberpaw. "I need to know you aren't going to cut me off, because you're really important to me, and if I said something dumb I am really sorry because I didn't mean to hurt you at all." If she could've thought of something else to say, she would have. She didn't want to lose a friend. What if I said something wrong again? She'd pushed it too far, hadn't she? Oh no. What did I do?

Fawnpaw followed her gaze to the stars, resting there for a couple moments before he peeked to her as if wordlessly asking what she'd been searching for up there. It would be easier if the stars had the answers written among them, but he'd never had such luck. Although he parted his muzzle, nothing came; there were a pawful of things he could be confessing to with varying degrees of seriousness, yet he was deterred by the possibility of her revolt or disappointing her with falling short of her expectations of being a good cat.

Fawnpaw was unprepared for the brutal vulnerability that she suddenly offered him, and he was visibly rattled by it. Partly because he couldn't see himself meaning that much to anybody, least of all Amberpaw. "Cut you off?" Fawnpaw echoed softly. "No, it's… not like that, I don't think— and you didn't hurt me, I just never thought about it before. Like, really thought about if I was good and it's… complicated." His crooked, quivering grin that illustrated no happiness begged her to let that lie momentarily. "But you're not the problem. I mean, ...it's you, Amberpaw. How could you have anything to do with it? You're really sweet, and kind, and there for me. You actually know what to say when others don't." Feeling as though he'd overshared and shying away from the rawness of that, he cleared his throat, shifting his line of sight away. "Ah, I guess that was kind of dumb to say. But yeah, I… I wouldn't do that to you."

[lone]

Originally Posted by Dipper

Fawnpaw followed her gaze to the stars, resting there for a couple moments before he peeked to her as if wordlessly asking what she'd been searching for up there. It would be easier if the stars had the answers written among them, but he'd never had such luck. Although he parted his muzzle, nothing came; there were a pawful of things he could be confessing to with varying degrees of seriousness, yet he was deterred by the possibility of her revolt or disappointing her with falling short of her expectations of being a good cat.

Fawnpaw was unprepared for the brutal vulnerability that she suddenly offered him, and he was visibly rattled by it. Partly because he couldn't see himself meaning that much to anybody, least of all Amberpaw. "Cut you off?" Fawnpaw echoed softly. "No, it's… not like that, I don't think— and you didn't hurt me, I just never thought about it before. Like, really thought about if I was good and it's… complicated." His crooked, quivering grin that illustrated no happiness begged her to let that lie momentarily. "But you're not the problem. I mean, ...it's you, Amberpaw. How could you have anything to do with it? You're really sweet, and kind, and there for me. You actually know what to say when others don't." Feeling as though he'd overshared and shying away from the rawness of that, he cleared his throat, shifting his line of sight away. "Ah, I guess that was kind of dumb to say. But yeah, I… I wouldn't do that to you."

Amberpaw wished she could've found some semblance of empathy to share with him, but Fawnpaw's joyless grin, begging her to leave it alone won over her first instinct in the end. She'd never had to worry about whether she was actually good or not. The day she had to make a decision she wouldn't be able to take back, she guessed she'd find out. Hopefully, that day wouldn't come for a long time. She was nowhere near ready to make a decision that could have severe, lasting consequences. She'd have to make one at some point in her lifetime, as most cats did, but for the moment, she was content.

Amberpaw released a breath she hadn't realized she was holding, relief flooding her as Fawnpaw reassured her. "It wasn't dumb. It was really nice of you," She responded quickly, confused as to why he would think it was dumb. What was wrong with being nice? Those were all good things to hear; Amberpaw appreciated reassurance, and it was good to know that she meant something to him, too. "Thanks for saying all that, I... kinda went off on you, huh?" She hadn't meant to say, well... everything she had said. He'd taken it a lot better than she'd expected, especially with the state she'd found him in.

"Anyways, anytime you need to talk to someone, or if you just don't want to be alone... like you said, I'm there for you." You deserve that much. Everyone deserved someone, right? It was hard to handle things on your own... having someone to trust was what made life easier. That's what she'd always understood, anyways.

[Fawn]

Originally Posted by Lonestar23

Amberpaw wished she could've found some semblance of empathy to share with him, but Fawnpaw's joyless grin, begging her to leave it alone won over her first instinct in the end. She'd never had to worry about whether she was actually good or not. The day she had to make a decision she wouldn't be able to take back, she guessed she'd find out. Hopefully, that day wouldn't come for a long time. She was nowhere near ready to make a decision that could have severe, lasting consequences. She'd have to make one at some point in her lifetime, as most cats did, but for the moment, she was content.

Amberpaw released a breath she hadn't realized she was holding, relief flooding her as Fawnpaw reassured her. "It wasn't dumb. It was really nice of you," She responded quickly, confused as to why he would think it was dumb. What was wrong with being nice? Those were all good things to hear; Amberpaw appreciated reassurance, and it was good to know that she meant something to him, too. "Thanks for saying all that, I... kinda went off on you, huh?" She hadn't meant to say, well... everything she had said. He'd taken it a lot better than she'd expected, especially with the state she'd found him in.

"Anyways, anytime you need to talk to someone, or if you just don't want to be alone... like you said, I'm there for you." You deserve that much. Everyone deserved someone, right? It was hard to handle things on your own... having someone to trust was what made life easier. That's what she'd always understood, anyways.

In spite of her promise that it hadn't been dumb, a warmth still collected on his cheeks and mindlessly guided his paw to scuff over the ground. "It's not really a big deal," he said, quiet, "you were worried and just…" Fawnpaw shrugged away the rest of the sentence because he felt drained, and they both already knew as it was. After a breath of silence, he went on to express a fear that'd been formulating in the recesses of his guilt, "It's not like I'd ever cut you off, but.. what if— I'm a bad influence, or something? And shouldn't be around you?" The devastating possibility of being a bad cat at heart kept his anxiety levels high, and he was unwilling to knowingly drag Amberpaw with him.

Fawnpaw's heart grew heavy at the sentiment, grateful but undeserving of her kindness. As much as he enjoyed being around her, he inwardly promised to keep maintenance at a minimum for her sake and to avoid placing an undue burden on their friendship. "Hey, thanks.. that means a lot." Earnest, he peered to her affectionately. "It's really nice, having you as a friend," a brisk, nervous laugh, "and I am kind of terrified of ruining that someday."