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March 29th, 2017, 02:51 AM
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The Mouseless Warrior
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Join Date: Oct 2016
Gender: Female
Posts: 10,088
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Re: ShadowClan Warriors' Den
Featherdust fluffed the moss in her nest, floofing it so that when she finally laid down, she sank into it's pillowy softness. With a contented purr, her eyes closed and she began to drift off... @ coldheart
Last edited by Rivergold; March 29th, 2017 at 02:52 AM.
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March 29th, 2017, 02:54 AM
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Re: ShadowClan Warriors' Den
Coldheart pads into the den with a plump wood mouse clenched between his strong jaws, he drops it by featherdust.
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March 29th, 2017, 03:02 AM
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The Mouseless Warrior
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Join Date: Oct 2016
Gender: Female
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Re: ShadowClan Warriors' Den
Quote:
Originally Posted by coldheart
Coldheart pads into the den with a plump wood mouse clenched between his strong jaws, he drops it by featherdust.
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(I'm only doing this as constructive criticism, so you know how to rp in the future. You know how the books are written? Great job on writing in paragraph form, like reading a story, and in third person. The only thing I will say is to make sure you post in past tense, for example walked, talked, ran instead of walks, talks, runs. Otherwise, your first post is very good!)
Featherdust started slightly, then glared up at the cat who dared disturb her sacred rest. " What, do you want?" she growled, her voice dripping with barely contained rage.
Last edited by Rivergold; March 29th, 2017 at 03:02 AM.
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March 29th, 2017, 03:07 AM
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Re: ShadowClan Warriors' Den
Coldheart was slighty taken back by her short snap, "ohh I'm sorry, I just was trying to help". there was a slight pause " I just saw you did not take any fresh kill". he was slightly crestfallen at his timid response.
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March 29th, 2017, 03:11 AM
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The Mouseless Warrior
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Join Date: Oct 2016
Gender: Female
Posts: 10,088
My Mood:
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Re: ShadowClan Warriors' Den
Quote:
Originally Posted by coldheart
Coldheart was slighty taken back by her short snap, "ohh I'm sorry, I just was trying to help". there was a slight pause " I just saw you did not take any fresh kill". he was slightly crestfallen at his timid response.
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She glanced at the prey he dropped and snagged it with a claw, devouring it with a couple of bites. "Where you found a wood mouse in Leaf-bare, let alone a fat one, is beyond me." She ran a quick paw over her whiskers and purred. "Thank you."
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March 29th, 2017, 03:14 AM
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Re: ShadowClan Warriors' Den
Coldheart padded a square of moss, stretched and placed himself next to featherdust and slowly allowed his eyelids to close.
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March 29th, 2017, 03:19 AM
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The Mouseless Warrior
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Join Date: Oct 2016
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Re: ShadowClan Warriors' Den
Featherdust frowned and shifted in her nest, reaching out with a paw to prod the tom. " How can you sleep on that?"
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March 29th, 2017, 03:22 AM
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Re: ShadowClan Warriors' Den
Coldheart opened one eye and mumbled "I'm can't be bothered to replace the moss, I'm so tired I could sleep for a moon."
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March 29th, 2017, 03:30 AM
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The Mouseless Warrior
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Join Date: Oct 2016
Gender: Female
Posts: 10,088
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Re: ShadowClan Warriors' Den
"That isn't moss. That is a scrap of ground colored green." She stood up and nosed him to get him to stand. "Lay in my nest while I fix yours."
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March 29th, 2017, 03:51 AM
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Re: ShadowClan Warriors' Den
Coldheart stooped up while parting his powerful jaws in a yawn. " Ohh, I have the brains of a kit". he looks away embarrassed.
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