The tabby went to go tackle his brother, getting midway to a leap before they began to head out. Wow, he was not paying attention. Ears twitching as they all began to make their way to the entrance. His attempt at murder being forgotten as he follows suit. Excited to see what awaits outside the walls, now that it was legal for him to go out there. Ah, the wonderful air of freedom and abiding by the law...for now.
Stomping as he followed his mentor, he was zipping his head around every which way. Amber eyes flickering with unbridled excitement. He could absolutely run from this bush to that tree in 2 nanoseconds. He could! But he did not, because he had to be serious and had to retrieve some sweet honey. At least that's what he'd been told, that it's rather sweet. For a price, and that price was bees. They hurt.
As Larkfire came to a stop, he too came to a stop...a few pawsteps ahead of her, ears angled forwards as he watched a rather angry hive of bees buzz about. If he were to guess...honey would be in that big ol brown rock hanging from the tree. Without missing a beat the tom answered "Angry cottonballs." with a chirp.
Larkfire
She/Her | Shadow Fiend & Beefed Up (T1) Purrk
'Angry cottonballs.' Skies save them, that was one way to describe the buzzing bees filled with brutal efficiency. Inclining her head in agreement, Larkfire steeled her nerves before backing away from the hive to find a patch of mud thick enough to conceal her feline scent. Casting amber hues in Eveningpaw's direction, Larkfire raised an eyebrow. "I'd suggest you cover as much as yourself as you can if you prefer being stung as little as possible."
With that, the lithe enforcer began rolling on the ground, coating her pelt with a thick later of dirt and mud before rising back to her paws and resisting the urge to shake out her pelt like a wet dog. "Here goes." Larkfire said grimly, rolling over a small pebble on the ground and kicking it towards the tree trunk. The small impact and noise at the base was enough to draw a good amount bees away from the hive and circle the pebble, sufficiently distracting a good bunch of them for the time being.
Lark wasn't stupid enough to think all the bees would have left at the sound of her little diversion. "Stay down." She warned her apprentice. If all went not-wrong, she'd be able to kick some part of the hive down for Eveningpaw to grab and squirrel off with.
With a quick leap, the youngest enforcer let out a grunt as she clawed her way up the tree bark, amber hues narrowed with focus. Soon, she'd made it to where she needed to be, balancing precariously. Well. She was getting stung for sure, there was no doubt about it. Quick as lightning, the slim grey feline darted forward, paw swiping in an arc.
White, sharp claws gleamed in the sunlight as Larkfire brought down her force, splitting the beehive somewhere at the side and causing the detached part to go tumbling to the ground with a resounding crackle.
A hiss escaped Larkfire's maw as the first of many stings set in. "Get the honey comb and run back to where we left the others, Eveningpaw!" The youngest enforcer commanded, and then pivoted on her heel to follow her own advice. Of course, she'd be taking a detour to lead the bees elsewhere, and then doubleback later. With a bound, she was out of the tree and racing off slowly enough to be followed by the angry bunch of insects behind her.
[ +2 Honey Comb | @vampire - Houndhunter / @ameko - Morningpaw | We have a few days extension, even if this is due today. Since the groups split up you guys are free to post in your own time ]
Larkfire
She/Her | Shadow Fiend & Beefed Up (T1) Purrk
Skies, did Larkfire have to do everything by herself? Bewildered - and displeased - when she noticed Eveningpaw hadn't scooped up the honey comb and made a break for it, Larkfire herself had to loop back and snag the herbs in her mouth before racing back towards camp. Where the hell had her apprentice gone? An irritated growl rumbled in her throat, but she'd deal with it later. Right now, the bee stings on her pelt were raging with pain.
| Silverlark |
Shadow Fiend - Inactive | Just a Scratch - Inactive | Beefed Up [Tier 2] - Inactive
Gray fur glinting silver in the moonlight, the young, recently named warrior took advantage of his new rank to more properly safekeep ShadowClan's lands. No longer bound to the confines of the camp, Silverlark took this opportunity to visit the one cat he'd been unable to show his face to since he'd failed her last. It was on the route of the guard duties Nighthound had bestowed upon him, and he hoped the ShadowClan enforcer wouldn't mind the monochrome tom taking this chance now. He didn't know what grave his mother lay in. He hadn't dared shown his face here when they had fixed this place. The idea of finding his mum's grave dug up by some... some mutt... It had made him sick so soon after losing her.
The ShadowClan scent in the air was stale. No one had been here in a while. No wonder the dogs had taken up residence here. Gratefully, there was no sign of intruders, and the tom gave a sigh of relief. He wasn't afraid of fighting anyone to defend his home, but the idea of the graves being messed with again did not sit well with the rounded ears tom. Marking the place and ensuring he truly was alone, Silverlark sat by the center of the clearing, verdant hues turned towards the moon.
"Hey mum. Been a while. I'm sorry... Thought I shouldn't talk to you again until... until I made right by my promise. That I'd become a warrior. And I did, I did!" he chirped happily before his expression turned more somber, sorrow tainting his smile. "She's doing good, you know? I didn't let him do the same to her. Make her feel like she doesn't belong. She's happy... and knows she has family. I just... I just wish you could've met her. But... She knows you. At least a little. Everything she gets from me, I got it all from you. So don't worry, mum. I'll keep a good eye on her. I promise."
__________________
Lightningstorm is WindClan's current medicine cat.
She has a semi-closed den policy.
Truth be told, Darkfall wanted to make this quick, but he also wanted to visit the loved ones who found themselves laid to rest here. It was getting late and the lack of sleep was starting to catch up to him. With a yawn, the dark-pelted tabby made his way through the familiar path of the grove, marking his scent along the way.
First up was his mother. Heading over to the grave of the white and black tabby, Darkfall could already feel his paws growing heavy. Stars above, he still hated coming here. "Hey mom..." he said in a soft voice as he approached the spot that held the cat who had brought him into the world. "I just wanted to stop by again, and give you an update on how things are going." It was a shame, really. All this time had passed and he still couldn't shake the arkwardness [pun intended] that accompanied "talking' with his mother. Sitting down and resting his tail over his paws, he took a moment to collect his thoughts. "It's been a while, huh?" He asked rhetorically. He hadn't stopped by to see his mother the last time he came out here to talk with Fallenpaw over two moons ago, and quite honestly couldn't remember the last time that he did.
"I'm an enforcer now," He said proudly "I haven't done too much just yet, but I was able to climb my way up through the clan a little bit. Do you think I could become deputy next? Of course, not wishing anything bad on Vulturefang - as much as I dislike him, but perhaps in the future?" He wasn't quite sure what time had in store for him, but he had always aspired to become an enforcer and then eventually deputy. Perhaps with a bit more hard work, things would work out for him.
"There's some more things I'd like to tell you, but I still need to see Cinderblaze and Fallenpaw before I head back. I'll chat more the next time I stop by," he promised, rising to his paws. As he began to walk away, however, he turned his head over his shoulder one last time. "Oh, and mom? I hope... I hope that I can make you proud to call me your son." He said, voice trembling a little. With that, he began making his way to where the former deputy rested.
After a short walk, Darkfall found himself before the grave that his first mentor had been laid in. He patted the spot and took a seat next to it. "Hey there Cinderblaze, I'll keep this short because I know how much you dislike longwinded conversations," he said, a sad smile gracing his lips as he remembered his ever-serious mentor. "I just wanted to let you know that I'm an enforcer now." Taking a moment to smooth out his fur, he then spoke again "It's not quite as good as deputy, and I didn't really have to fight for it, but I hope that it's something that I can brag to you about when I get up there with you."
Oh Cinderblaze, the deputy that he had grown to look up to before his untimely death at the paws of some two-legs. "Oh, we also captured Sunkissed Creek. It took two attempts, but we did manage to wrestle it away from those treelickers - ah, that's something my second apprentice, Rufflepaw calls them," he said with a light-hearted chuckle. He hadn't intended to, but he ended up picking up the nickname for their rival clan from the young tom.
"I think... I was too soft on Moonpaw, maybe that's why she left. I hope using you as an example will help me do a better job with Rufflepaw and Cobwebpaw. They're both pretty clever in their own ways, I'm sure that they'll be wonderful warriors when they're older." That was right, the last time he came by was well before he had become a mentor of his own. He hoped that Cinderblaze was up there somewhere guiding him so that he wouldn't fail the two toms he was in charge of. Rising to his paws he pat the grave one last time. "I'm going to go see my sister now, I'll try to do a better job of stopping by and updating you."
Walking away, he began to make his way toward the last of his stops before he could head home.
As he approached the spot where he buried his sister all those moons ago, he couldn't help the wave of sadness that took over him. How could he have forgotten? It had been twelve moons since the deaths of these cats, he was just barely halfway through his training at the time. It was crazy to think about, leaf-fall had once been his favorite season, and now he despised it more than the others.
Laying down next to the grave, he sat in silence for a while. It wasn't that he didn't want to talk, he just felt there wasn't a need to do any more than enjoy the comforting feeling of "being in the presence" of his sister.
"Fallenpaw," he called softly, interrupting the quiet atmosphere "I'm back, just like I promised." The last time he had come here, it was just to see Fallenpaw. Before leaving, he had promised that he would come by more often, and though it was the second moon since then, he planned to keep that promise.
"When you died I promised that I'd become a good enough warrior for the both of us, do you remember?" The large tom asked, voice contorting with the pain of the memory. "Well, I managed to become an enforcer. Pretty cool right? Your big brother has a little bit to his name. 'Darkfall the enforcer' - has a nice ring to it don't ya think?" he said with a slight smile. He hadn't been able to keep all of his promises to her, but he was glad he was able to keep at least one.
His expression then soured as he thought about the next topic at hand. "Last time I was here, I talked about Larkfire. Do you remember?" he asked rhetorically. Of course she remembered, he spent the whole time he visited almost, just talking about the young queen. "Well, she's a mother now. Scared me half to death, but she is in fact a mother." he said, shaking his head slightly.
"I'll admit it. I was jealous - still am if I'm being truthful." He admitted with a bit of reluctance. "I don't know if I was too late or what, but it seems that she found a different tom while things were rocky between us. I don't blame her of course, but... I don't know... I can still be upset about it right?" Truth be told, he didn't have anyone else to blame but himself, and he knew that. Them falling apart, growing distant, not talking to each other, it was all his fault. Everything negative that had caused a rift to form between the two was a direct result of his refusal to stop being a little baby and talk about his feelings.
Well, what was done was done. He had to move forward.
"I still love her Fallenpaw... Seeing her there with her kits, surrounded by all of that blood, acting all... weird... It just... it felt like my heart was being torn in two." He said, squeezing his eyes shut at the memory. That had been a hellish experience, one he felt he could have done more for, but he was just glad that the amber-eyed enforcer survived the ordeal.
Loosing a deep breath he got to the part he hadn't wanted to acknowledge for the last few weeks. "One of her kits... a tom, was born dead..." A single tear rolled down the muscular tom's face as he recalled the mangled body of the young tom. "I think it's my fault... I killed him Fallenpaw, I killed her son." The tears were flowing more readily now, the sense of shame and remorse that he felt was just overpowering. "I thought things between us were getting better, that maybe I had a chance to make things right, to maybe win her back over. But now? There's no way. I messed up so bad Fallenpaw and I don't know what to do anymore," he cried.
A string of sobs rocked his body as he thought about it. He was okay with Larkfire hating him forever, hell, he would be fine if they never spoke again. But killing her son? That was something that would stick with him for the rest of his life. There wasn't a single thing that he felt he could do to atone for the sin of putting her in the position to get kicked by that fox so soon to her kitting. He caused it, he caused the death of one of her precious little ones.
"Fallenpaw... I've tried so hard - I'm trying so hard to be a big brother that you can be proud of, but I just can't do anything right!" he wailed "So what if I'm an enforcer now? I failed our brothers and sister, I failed mom, I failed Cinderblaze, I failed you, and I failed her. Fallenpaw, I KILLED her son! I can't even bear to look at my own reflection in the stream anymore! I've been trying to do a bit to help her out with Sleepykit here and there, but I still can't shake the guilt off. I don't deserve her, Fallenpaw, I'm nothing but bad luck!"
He hadn't intended for things to head in this direction when he came out here, but here he was, lamenting his failures and whining to the grave of a long-dead cat. He was honestly pathetic. Like actually. He had to get himself together, but how? There was no one else to talk about these things with. Larkfire was... that was a difficult situation to properly judge, and everyone else was just dead. He didn't even feel right talking to his mother's or old mentor's graves about these kinds of things. All he had was Fallenpaw.
After a while of crying in silence, Darkfall managed to get himself together. Oof, that was rough. He really needed to stop coming out here and bothering his sister with his life's problems.
Using a paw to wipe his face, he got up. "Oh wow, sorry about that little sis. I lost my cool for a moment," he said, with a bit of embarrassment. "Well, it's getting late and I should really head back. I'm going to try to sort things out properly with Larkfire, so I'll let you know how that goes next time I stop by," he told her "I'll see you in a bit. I hope that you'll be able to guide my paws going forward."
And with that, Darkfall left the small grave behind. He did one more sweep of the grove to ensure that it was well marked and there were no lurking outsiders about, and began the long trek home.
__________________
Little Disclaimer: I live in EST (UTC-5) and my sleep schedule is completely messed up, so posts may be erratic My Characters
Larkfire
She/Her | The Wraith Shadow Fiend & Beefed Up (T1) Purrk
Larkfire hadn't meant to.. intrude. She'd come out here purely out of coincidence, to visit Daykit's grave while she had the chance. Maybe she'd even visit Daypaw's grave. She had buried her deceased son right beside the uncle he was named after, after all. In the end, she wound up watching Darkfall in silence, unable to stop the ache that bloomed in her heart. She'd never seen him so lost, so utterly... down.
And she disliked it.
Larkfire was too far away to hear whatever he was saying, to hear whatever was making him weep so, but it didn't sit right with her to just turn and walk away. On quiet, tentative paws, The Wraith slunk over to an empty corner and practically melded with the shadows as she settled down, her head on her paws. She still remained far away enough to give her denmate his privacy, with whatever he was saying.
Eventually, when he was long gone, Larkfire approached the grave in question, mouth pulled down in a frown. Ah. Fallenpaw's grave. She remembered burying them. Sinking down into the spot Darkfall had previously vacated, the lithe grey feline pressed her cheek against the slightly damp dirt, amber hues turning distant for a moment. "I didn't know he missed you that much." She whispered to the wind, feeling like someone had pushed her out of her own body.
She was a fool. Of course Darkfall would miss his sister; it was only natural. Just because Larkfire had terrible luck with siblings didn't mean all had the same. She coiled her tail tightly around herself. "I hadn't realized... I... Your brother does not cry a lot." She admitted after a moment. "Or at least, I've never seen him cry so." She felt guilty, all of a sudden. How much had the dark-furred tom hid from her, and she'd never bothered much to ask after? Was she really that horrible?
With a soft sigh, Larkfire cast her gaze down to the earth again. "I wish you could come back, if it'd really make him happy."
[ @Dark - Darkfall | Eeep, I was gonna have Larkfire walk over and settle down beside him, but I didn't know how to make that work with Darkfall having left at the end of your post. Typed this instead. ]
[Hawkbite]
Enforcer Commander
Shadow Fiend | Just a Scratch | Agatha Kitty
The tom had declined the offer Silverlark suggested and carried his apprentice towards the burial grounds. His pace was slow and somber. No words would escape him as he brought Starry's body to her resting location. Hawkbite had made sure to pick a pretty part of the grove, looking towards Silverlark for approval.
"I think this spot is perfect for her," he'd speak softly, looking up towards the sky. There was a clear view, perfect for the nighttime when it would be lit up with stars. Suiting in his opinion.
Without waiting long on Silverlark, Hawkbite would begin digging into the hard ground. Any colder and they wouldn't be able to do this. It wouldn't take long before his claws would ache, but he'd continue through the pain. In fact, it was helpful for the frustration he felt. He could aim his frustrations at the dirt instead of starting war with ThunderClan. Tears would threaten the corners of his eyes while he dug, only stopping when the hole was sufficient enough for the body.
He'd hop out of the hole they worked on and stare at Silverlark silently. Deep down he was hoping the tom would have something to say.
@Alchemist Kitsune - Silverlark [can do an in post time skip to after Starry is buried if you want, if silver has thoughts for before and after process]
| Silverlark |
Shadow Fiend - Inactive | Just a Scratch - Inactive | Beefed Up [Tier 3] - Inactive
The gray tom followed after the enforcer commander in silence, respectful within the context of the situation. His friend had died. Murdered by the brutish, lawless of ThunderClan. But he knew that if he was feeling this death leaving an emptiness in his already heavily bruised heart - these past few moons had been... difficult - then Hawkbite must be feeling it tenfold. Unlike himself, Starry had been blessed with a wonderful mentor. He had been happy for his friend. Nobody deserved to be treated like his mentors had treated him. Abandoned and mocked. Not a single lesson from either of them. In comparison, it had always been clear just how close Hawkbite and Starrywisp were to each other.
Nodding as the brown tabby chose a spot for Starry's final rest, Silverlark proceeded to help. It was a familiar motion for him by now, with all the bodies he'd helped bring here of late. He supposed that was the silver lining to his not having bonded with any mentor. When he died, he wouldn't leave anyone broken at the realization they would never see him again. Instead he would be the one who would hopefully meet up with his fallen family and friends. When his time under the moonlight came.
The silence surrounding both enforcers was well embraced by the young tom. He didn't want to get in the way of his friend's grieving. And yet... as they sat staring at the dug up dirt that would swallow up a fallen star into the bowels of the earth, he could feel the sorrow deepen with his heart. This was it... He would never see Starrywisp again. Not until the day he died, if he was lucky enough to go to StarClan... These same thoughts were probably going through Sir Bits' head as they sat side by side, mourning for a life lost far too young.
"I didn't get it. Why Dawnstar changed her name when she was an apprentice. She was always Wrenny, ya know?" Silverlark mewed, breaking the silence as he kept his eyes on the grave. "It wasn't until I was older, yeah? Knew she was the star of the clan. Always the light, mmhmm. And shadows... Shadows can't exist without light, ya know? Otherwise it's just all dark. I bet others looked at her and thought she wasn't all that ShadowClan-y... but I can't think of another cat I would have rather apprenticed with."
A small, sad smile wormed its way through the muscular warrior's expression, lifting his verdant hues to his companion as he continued, "I don't think mentors get said this enough... Not good ones, anyways. Everyone's too busy complaining about the bad ones. But thank you. Starrywisp's time in ShadowClan was the best ever because of you. I'm sure she would want you to know that."
@SuspiciousMindz [Starrywisp]
| Decided to go with before they buried her, in case Hawk wants to say something before they cover her up. |
__________________
Lightningstorm is WindClan's current medicine cat.
She has a semi-closed den policy.
[Hawkbite]
Enforcer Commander
Shadow Fiend | Just a Scratch | Agatha Kitty
He'd stare at the fallen star below them now, positioned so sweetly. A forever slumber, if you will. Hawkbite took a moment to inhale sharply, letting the cold air sting his lungs as Silverlark began his small speech. It was lovely, even if Hawkbite couldn't express that in the moment. He appreciated his friend for being there. Next to Vixensnarl, this was his toughest loss thus far.
He went rigid.
That cut deep.
Nothing in Hawkbite's broken soul could've prepared him for the words that left Silverlark's mouth right then. Sorrowful eyes shot at the younger cat. Hawkbite's body wasn't sure whether to snap at him or embrace him. Did this younger cat really think that highly of him? Think so kindly of he and Starry's relationship?
His body decided for him. Tears streamed down the Commanders face, though no sound escaped him as he just let his paws guide him towards Silverlark. Silent sobs escaped him further as he pressed his face into his friend's shoulder. Was this the only way he could show his appreciation? Dampening his friends shoulder with tears? Would Silverlark be okay with this? In the moment, it didn't matter.
--
It was a couple minutes before Hawkbite would be able to turn towards the grave once more. His paws numbly beginning to pile the dirt in. His throat felt tight, unable to breathe out the words he wanted to say.
It was only once they were done filling the hole, that Hawkbite would sit down. Without looking towards Silverlark, his grief-stricken tone would break their silence. "Thank you for everything. I don't think I could've done this by myself. . . and your words. . ." he had to pause as he raised a paw to swipe it over his tearful eye. "They were beautiful. Described her how I always had. You're a great friend."
| Silverlark |
Shadow Fiend - Inactive | Just a Scratch - Inactive | Beefed Up [Tier 3] - Inactive
Guilt threatened to bubble in the gray tom's gut at the sight of Hawkbite's tears, but after all his experience when it came to death, the young enforcer could temper it. The tabby's tears were not because of him. Not really. Yes, it had been his words that had provided the catalyst required for them to release, but they had been there. Waiting for the opportune moment to be spilled. He didn't comment on them. Didn't make promises of how everything would be alright. Because those tears had been earned. Starrywisp deserved them, and having shed so many himself, he would never deny a warrior the right to mourn a fallen clanmate, be them family or friend.
Rounded ears flattened only slightly when he felt the older tom press against him, the silent sobs tugging at his own sorrow until he found his eyes moistened, thin trails of darkened fur running down his cheeks. Raising his paw, Silverlark attempted to embrace his friend comfortingly. Let him cry to his heart's content until he was done. He'd had such kindness offered to him so many times before. It was his turn to return the favor. To be the rock for his friend to lean on until he could stand on his own four paws again.
The muscular warrior followed after Hawkbite, helping fill up Starry's final rest. His tears had been short lived - there was only so much heartbreak he could go through in a moon before it begun to grown numb - but the need to ensure his friend's grave was kept safe from element and predator alike was strong. He knew what had happened with the dogs before. His mum had been among those tossed like old crowfood. He would not allow the same to happen to anyone else.
His companion's voice breaking the brittle silence caught Silverlark's attention in an instant. There was no more scrapping of dirt to distract him. No more work to burden themselves with. Only the reality of their friend being buried, never to be seen again. Not in this life, in any case. Not one to have ever been shy or hide positive emotions from the rest, the young enforcer found himself giving Hawkbite a modest grin at his words - unable to offer his more usual, beaming smile under the gloomy circumstances, but giving any bit of positivity he could get - lifting his paw once more and attempting to place it on the dark tabby's shoulder. A gesture he considered equal parts encouraging and comforting.
"Don't think you do yourself no justices, Sir Bits. I think you can handle anything, yep. But... I'll always be here for you, friend," he reassured him. Turning back to the grave, he nodded before speaking again. "Oh, I hope so, I do. I think I mess up sometimes, though. Get too caught up in work, ya know? But... I'll remember this time, I will. Be back soon as the first flowers start showing up. Yep. Get some moss to cover her. She always did like things mossy mossy, mmhmmm."
His grin wavered, sorrow taking over it momentarily as he spoke. It was hard not to remember how fond she had been of that little moss ball. The one that had gotten her through her family's disappearance. Back when she had been a little Wren. He could still hear her, even to this day. Her giddy clamors and declarations, giving him his second nickname. Mossy. He'd liked it. It had suited him, his fur filled with moss and bits of mud every day. It would be the last favor he would be able to provide her. Make sure she still had that one thing that had brought her so much joy before she had gone and turned into a star.
@SuspiciousMindz [Hawkbite]
| Hawky just here breaking my heart. Think if you want to close this one with Hawkfur's next post, we can? Unless you prefer to leave it here, which works too! |
__________________
Lightningstorm is WindClan's current medicine cat.
She has a semi-closed den policy.
Content Warning ~ gore, mentions of amputation, mental turmoil
｡ﾟﾟ･｡･ﾟﾟ｡
ﾟ。 Mossfreckle (ShC)
ﾟ･｡･ﾟ they/he ~ medicine cat apprentice
Mossy hues had watched as Lostspark’s mask shuttered over her expression, the detached and cold medicine cat winning over on the tête-à-tête between mother and healer… well it wasn’t so much a matter of triumphing over the softer sides as it was a method of necessity and coping… Mossfreckle simply stared at the scene, far too in shock for his maw to even drop open… he needed to learn this, Lostspark needed to learn this but… this was not what he had expected when she said they would learn together… he had expected
an older cat - a feline less close to the two of them… a feline who was not of his mentors blood… stars there was so much blood but Mossfreckle just kept his mossy hues fixated as mother gnawed off her kits leg, at least the bone was so shattered already that she did not have to break it, the freckled oriental shaped feline thought morbidly. Starry mind was reeling - until it wasn’t - a whiskers length of cliff became an edge became a tumble into the unknown and mossy hues flickered to a detached cold hazed gaze, nothing was all he felt… focus, focus, focus, focus… was the incantation in the herbalist’s starry mind, this moment was all that mattered and as the spiralling void flashed before his gazed orbs he felt nothing, feathery tail twitched idly and all he did was stare and learn and commit the morbid filial scene to memory - it was black and white, no emotions: one) wrap a vine tightly to cut off blood supply, two) gnaw off the limb… fast snd meticulous and don’t stop until you are done, three) bind the limb with marigold poultice and cobwebs and pray to Starclan that all would be good… insecurity clawed relentlessly at Mossfreckle’s tattered heart… he had ask the little flame to be brave but he felt nothing like that… and as his oriental ears perked to his lithe grey mentors raw tones, her white maw coated in her kits blood, all he heard was the taunting whispering ocean static filling his ears as his freckled form moved as if possessed to complete the task he had been give as Lostspark became mother once more… he had told her to be and all he was was a hypocrite… he felt nothing like that word in the moment. A shattered part of him knew that this would get easier but his reeling starry mind wished it didn’t have to be so damn hard now… who was Starclan punishing… was it him, the kit, Lostspark… the thought trailed off as Mossfreckle sucked in a breath and shoved all the emotions - or lack thereof - to the dark depths of his core and with a shake of his angular head he attempted to rid himself of the hallow, hazed look of his mossy gaze.
I need you to bury... that... I'll clean up the blood here, I'd just rather Cinderkit not wake up and have to see... her leg on the floor, his fluffy grey mentors words weighed heavy on the medicine cat apprentice’s freckled lanky form and mossy hues flitted from Lostspark, to the kit, to the blood… oh stars there was so much blood…, to the black mangled leg lying off to the side, glinting with crimson, flecks of white bone jutting out in odd angles… Mossfreckle’s angular head bobbed down to gingerly pick up the small limb from the cold stone, white maw stained with crimson and the herbalist winced… it was still warm as if it still belonged to the living… instinct causing him to recoil away from the mangled appendage as if it was something that would cause insurmountable harm to him… swallowing the bile that had risen in his white throat Mossfreckle picked up the limb and padded out of the den and into the territory… if his little flame could be brave so could he… damn the eyes flitting to the morbid image of the freckled oriental shaped medicine cat apprentice bloodstained, a mangled limb hanging from his maw… they didn’t get to be a part of this moment… they didn’t get to see him with his heart tattered and raw with pained far to real emotion.
Diligent white tipped paws carried silent freckled from on his personal vigil to Moonlit Grove, the world around him was a blur… starry mind reeled and seemed to cast it haze into reality but he carried on… he simply put one paw in front of the other and carried on… focus, focus, focus, focus… the tangy, metallic, bittersweet smell of blood consumed his sense but onward he went. Mossfreckle entered the circular clearing after want felt like moons, with cations, gentle care the herbalist set the mangled appendage on the grass, white tipped paws beginning to dig as soon as the limb touched the found - white stained with earthen tones as he since his claws into the thawing earth, thorn sharp claws snagged and yanked on roots but the pain reminded him he was real and he needed to feel real… was he real… this situation was so real and every fiber of his freckled form wished he would wake with a jolt to the calm, herbal scent of the medicine cat’s den… but stars this was real… so, so horrifically real and it wasted pasted vividly and starkly in his starry mind. The hole was deep, at some point he had lost himself for a moment but maybe it was better he though as he picked up the now chilled limb and gingerly dropped it in the hole, white tipped paws pushing uprooted soil back in place and patting it down smooth - a single block of leaf bare thawing to new leaf caught his eye and Mossfreckle nipped the flower and laid it on the broken earth that now concealed Cinderkit’s lost leg… it wasn’t even the kit - he was so happy it wasn’t - but it wasn’t fair… it wasn’t fair… IT WASNT FAIR… but life wasn’t always fair in the end.
Exhausted and a little broken, Mossfreckle padded back to Shadowclan camp, the air seemed to bite coldly against his pelt but once again it just reminded him he was real, alpine scent washed over his senses as he took deep grounding breaths against the emotions that bubbled and threatened to overflow from his dark abysmal core… they could not see him like this… not the whole clan at least. Face hardened to a mask of indifference as he stalked to medicine den, white tipped paws padding quickly and the moment they hit the cold stone his mask faltered, broke, and fell away… Oriental shaped form sunk against the weight of the world as he stooped to lick the black head of the unconscious kit who wouldn’t even heart him, ”Im so proud of you little flame… so, so proud of you… you where so brave…,” his usually calm tones came out in a broken rasp but he kept his composure as he turned his mossy gaze to Lostspark… all of his words packed into that raw, broken look and without another utterance Mossfreckle padded to his nest and flopped down, his white tipped feathery tail curling around him as if the walls slamming up in his start mind had physically manifested… he would be okay but for now he just needed to process things… he just needed to feel all these emotions by himself… he would be okay once he woke up but for now he felt like hell incarnate as his starry mind reeled with thousands of emotions he wouldn’t be able to put into words.
Re: Moonlit Grove
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Think if you want to close this one with Hawkfur's next post, we can? Unless you prefer to leave it here, which works too! 
