Story Time

[forest]

So we are going to have storytime! Just a couple of funny things that happened to you and stuff.

I'll start.

So I have a thing where I get uncomfortable around the topic of pregnancy, I'm fine reading it in WCO, but to the story. it doesn't help that I'm AFAB though I'm apagender

So I was at my lunch table of 5ish friends (where we swear and talk abt sus stuff), and I was going to say "I only get uncomfortable around pregnant people." Still, my brain, who isn't paying attention at any given moment and grabs snippets of what it heard and gets it in the complete wrong order, made my mouth say: "I only get pregnant around uncomfortable people." The whole table went SILENT for a heartbeat, and then it erupted in laughter.

[zBlaze]

Okay, so I have a very comedic story for y'all.

 

I'm a Lutheran Christian, which means I go to Communion. Communion is what Lutherans do to represent the blood and body of Christ. They drink a tiny cup of wine/grape juice and a tiny wafer that sticks to the roof of your mouth if you aren't careful.

I was wearing my arch nemesis. A two inch heel (No judge). I was also wearing a white floral dress. My disastrous hair was done properly. This was two years ago at my first communion, which is a very special occasion. We had a pew reserved for me and my twin brother. My older sister hadn't had hers yet either due to the pandemic. She's three years older than me. I'm not going to say my age, since I don't like telling any of that stuff to people. I should've had the first communion before then, I was already behind in 2020 when I was scheduled to have it. So I was multiple years late.

Alright, so I was sitting in the pew. We got called up and everyone was moving really quick. I stood up and led my family, feeling proud and religious. I grabbed the grape juice, drank it, and everyone else was walking fast, and not stopping, so I quickly put the wafer in my mouth and continued walking. Unfortunately, it stuck to the roof of my mouth. I was so busy trying to unstuck it that I tripped over my own foot. The purple grape juice went FLYING through the air and spilled on my white dress. The tiny plastic glass bonked some little kiddo in the head. I was snorting at this point in attempt not to laugh. I cleared my throat and walked out into the bathroom where I busted out laughing. My sister said they could still hear me in the service.

LMAOOO

Alright, I have another story. I'm very, very silly. I have lots of stories being honest lol

 

When I was in kindergarten, we had this honeysuckle bush at the playground. All the cool kids took the liberty of drinking the nectar out of those things. Oh, how bad I wanted to be over there with the cool girls and their stuffed toys! And so, as you could imagine, I was ecstatic when a cool girl, named Ellie, invited me over. Lord have mercy, I was bouncing on my heels when I followed her.

We talked about the coolest pony stuffed animal (Owned by a girl named Camille) and how much we wanted it. We talked Kindergarten gossip; like who had a crush on which boy and which boy could jump off the swing. Then, Ellie offered me a honeysuckle. Excited as crap, I took it, and me me, not knowing how to eat it properly, put the whole dern thing in my mouth! I was never invited to eat honeysuckles with the cool kids again. Womp Womp.