Crisis averted; for now, at least. As it appeared that Junipersong was beginning to calm down, Kestrelwing stood up straighter and gave his fur a shake. As much as the outside word was chaotic right now, at least half of him was submerged in water, a place he felt the most comfortable.

That was, until Juniperson tried to reach out to touch her nose to his shoulder. A small growl before he pulled away slightly. He didn't offer any snarky retort, or retaliate physically by swiping at her with a paw. But he wasn't ready... to accept that level of intimacy with really anyone.

"You're well liked in the Clan," he offered instead with a small cough, feeling like the tension now created in the air was like ants crawling under his pelt. "But don't confuse your relation to me with me being good in the Clan. You don't know me as well as you think you do - no one does." A certain bitterness had now taken over his tone as he backed up a bit, creating space between himself and Junipersong. Wall after wall came back up, right into place, and his expression became a mask of unreadable emotions.

Despite being thrust into a certain position of... what was it even? Leadership? Authority? He was still a warrior at the end of the day, with love and loyalty for his home and Clanmates. But that didn't mean he wanted this kind of relationship with any of them.

"We're Clanmates, Junipersong. I respect you as a warrior, and perhaps maybe... a friend. But I am not somebody that anybody wants to be around for the long haul. Trust me on that." The cold, hard edge that he was known for, back in his voice. For a moment, yellow eyes stared into green, as if Kestrelwing was searching for something. Then, they narrowed once more.

"I would still like Snakeheart to take a look, just to make sure nothing's wrong. You don't have to explain why. Just go under the guise of a coyote attack check up."


// @Dizerel

”I serve RiverClan. I am loyal to RiverClan. But that doesn’t mean that I’m going to start becoming buddy-buddy with the cats who turned their back on me when my mother died.” Kestrelwing’s tone was sharp, like steel slicing through frozen ice. There was no room for anymore discussion on the topic, and back in his gaze was the steely mask of thorns, blocking anyone from studying them too closely to discover what lay beneath.

The gray tabby simply scoffed at the next part, trotting out of the pond and shaking off each forepaw in turn. The water droplets flung out around him, spraying the nearby fronds. Off to the side he heard the scurrying of paws - a small creature, perhaps, trying to escape the tension as well.

At the mention of sharing a meal, Kestrelwing hesitated. He knew that no amount of talking or venting or prey would alleviate the weight he’d felt in his heart since Firehawk’s death. Lionstorm had told him it wasn’t his fault... he’d told him that there was no way it could’ve been predicted... but he still felt responsible.

”As long as it’s not a fish from this pond,” he finally growled, though this time there was no ill tone to his voice, or malice. ”I think this pond needs a chance to clean itself.” It was a pitiful joke, but Kestrelwing didn’t have the energy to try and come up with anything better.

Raising his eyes to look at Junipersong, he studied her briefly. How alike they were...


// @Dizerel

What was there left to say? That it was impossible for him to ever really believe that anyone cared for him that deeply? Especially since his last remaining kin had just left - missing without a trace. Even with trying to track Eelsting for a few days after his disappearance he'd come up empty pawed. No. The first death of his mother had made him cold, and Eelsting's disappearance had made him rock solid, rooted firmly in the cold abyss he had created for himself.

"I'm going to get some hunting done. Toadpounce only sent out one patrol, and even though I sent out a few more the Clan still needs food. Don't think that just because I'm not heading back to camp with you that means you can skirt around seeing Snakeheart. I'll be asking him about it." Without much left to say, Kestrelwing gave Junipersong a curt nod before trotting off, jaws parted to catch any passing prey scent.


// @Dizerel