Re: WindClan Nursery
The leader chuckled softly to herself as she rested her chin on her paws and observed Peachfrost. The she-cat was certainly blossoming into her role just perfectly. StarClan had chosen the right cat for the job, this once. Twilightstar would remain sketchy about StarClan for the rest of her lives, even after she joined them. As the poppy seeds were pushed towards her, she lapped them up without a word, doubtful that she'd be sleeping all that well.
"Thank you, Peachfrost, for everything, we're lucky to have you." Twilightstar meowed, tone filled with warm gratitude. She didn't think WindClan could have had a better cat to step into Coldamber's paw steps. The lilac she-cat would have to make more of an effort to chat with Peachfrost in the future. She wouldn't be able to leave camp for a time, which meant she could not go and speak with him about little things, so whether it was out of her comfort zone or not, she was going to have to try and speak with those who offered to lend their ears more often.
Her attention turned to the queens nursing her kits. Ashfeather seemed to thoroughly love them which made the tension in her heart just ease a bit. She felt better knowing that even if she became busy or something happened to her, her kits would have someone to love them. Whereas Ashfeather was easy to read, Miststone was a bit harder to see if she was bothered by having to care for two kits that weren't her own. She didn't think she would have offered if she didn't want to help out. One ear twisted towards her head as Leechkit, even as young as he was, seemed to have trouble sharing as he swatted away his sister. Glancing over to the pair Miststone had, she found Midnightkit seemed to be doing the same to her brother, Beastkit.
She hoped they grew out of it, but she got a bad feeling that Midnightkit and Leechkit were going to be a pawful as they grew. Lionkit's sudden wail had Twilightstar's entire body stiffing as she restrained herself from getting up and checking on runt after she spat up some milk. She was probably fine, being stuck on your back would upset the belly, still, mentally she fretted, wondering if the kit was sick or not. The thought of any of them having to join Rushingkit in StarClan weighed heavy in the back of her mind. "There's nothing wrong with them?" She directed her question at Peachfrost but was watching the four kits as she spoke.
@Rockfall
The petite lilac had been enjoying her fill suckling away and filling her small belly till she looked like a bloated frog. She was not at all expecting to be knocked away by one of her siblings. Lionkit slides down the soft warm fur and found herself cold and her legs... flailing the kit noticed that no matter what she did there was nothing underneath her legs anymore. The ground was gone! She couldn't see nor hear, and she discovered that her milk was gone as well. A small pink tongue darted out as she tried to search for a teat, but to no avail, it was just not there anymore.
Squirming, she made no sound, discovering that the solid mass underneath her back was the ground her paws had been a push against before. Why was it down there?! More importantly, how did she get her paws back there and where was the Milk Giver! Unknowing, having landed upside down, the squirming merely agitated the newborn's rather full belly. Lionkit felt wrong as if it would help, she squirmed to the point of thrashing and flailed her paws some more but still refused to cry. It wasn't until she felt something burst through her throat and out of her maw and nose that she did start mewling loud and clear. She had thrown up, it was in her nose and on her head and ears, it was quite the mess. Lionkit had no knowledge of what had just happened so simply laid on her back and cried.
@Undertaker @Jackpot (We can age them up by a moon as soon as Twilight done talking with Peach if you'd like. In my head Ash has Lion and Leech, and Mist has Midnight and Beast) @Topaztaill
(Set after everything above is going on, this a private conversation between Wolfie and Twi.)
It's as if every whisker weighs more than it should and gravity has been turned up tenfold. There's a certain level of tiredness that equates to insanity, and this was one of those levels. There are days the tiredness comes in both forms, physical and mental. Her body needs to rest yet my mind needs it to move, to burn the anxiety right out. Without exercise her mind will keep me up all night long, without rest my body will spiral into exhaustion. She was worn out, the poppy seeds kept her in a drowsy state, but her mind refused to give up the fight to remain awake. Her brain seemed to be in so much pain that it feels it must keep on working to keep her safe from her dreams. She needed to sleep, but Twilightstar knew that it would not come. She should speak with Peachfrost about giving her more poppy seeds, the two from earlier did nothing but kept her body sluggish.
Being this tired wore on the emotions, it can come together with a fatigued body, and become an ingrained part of a life that isn't lived but survived, endured. Twilightstar knew that she wasn't born for that, nobody was. No one came to a place so beautiful and abundant to live like this, so drained, stressed, trying to cope with life's storms and help others with theirs. She could remember the last time she dreamt and slept peacefully. It was getting better before Rushingkit. She felt like she was fighting the good fight, to take on any necessary suffering so that others have a greater chance at good health, peace, and wellness. But at what cost...
At the sound of incoming paw steps, both her ears shot up along with her head. Her green eyes glittered in the dark den as she made out the large silhouette of WindClan's deputy. Ah, Wolffang, it had utterly slipped her mind to see him out after the meeting. She was glad that he took the initiative and sought her out instead. As he spoke, she saw that he kept looking down at his paws it reminded her great of an ashamed kit. He fixed his gaze meeting her jade eye, but he still radiated a certain nervousness. Her thoughts on Wolffang were conflicting, she knew he was a good cat, but sadly his... differences made it hard to fully connect and understand him.
Like his glancing around as if checking for eyes to see who was watching him. He seemed far too worried about the judgment of others, Twilightstar had her concerns when it came to the thoughts of her clanmates, but not like Wolffang. "I'm well enough to speak with you," Twilightstar grunted, slowly shifting in the nest below so that she could sit up properly. Her limbs felt like her very bones were weighed down with the heaviest of rocks, but she did eventually get her legs to do as she wanted after parting her maw wide in a yawn. "We'll speak here, the kits and queens are resting, and I don't want to move much if I don't have to." She replied, slowly curling her tail around her thin legs as she spoke. Never one to mince her words, she jumped straight into it.
"I'm going to be very blunt with you, I'm not certain if picking you was a mistake on my part or not. The way you handle yourself only moments after being named deputy was atrocious, but you already know that." There would be no point in diving too deeply into that again, she had already scolded him for it.
"I know that you are a good loyal member of WindClan and that is why I'm keeping you as my deputy even though I have my doubts. I know that you'll try to serve your clan to the best of your abilities, but I do worry about the clan and the members if I was ever to leave WindClan in your paws. Though strong and a fierce warrior, you lack the empathy needed to connect with the clan. Even though you've proven to be able to overlook and respect certain cats, I fear those who don't earn or acquire such respect will be unfairly treated and that WindClan will slowly tear itself apart from the inside out or that your reign will short and full of fear."
"You worry far too much about where a cat came from, who their parents are, and what they look and solely use that to judge whether they'd make a good or bad clanmate. It's vain and that alone could easily taint WindClan as well as make our allies turn against us. It's not a future that I want for WindClan, not for my clanmates and not for my kits. I'm not going to ask you to change yourself or your views, that's like asking a tabby to change its stripes and it would be unfair of me. Instead, I'm letting you know that I have no plans to leaving WindClan to you. You will serve as my deputy, but that is all you will ever be. I will not remove you from the rank of deputy, but one day you will have to give it up."
@TheNyanCatMinecart
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