[iliri]

Springpaw
long-furred, oriental-shaped, gray-and-orange calico molly with blue eyes; torn right ear
purrks: herbal knowledge - tier 2 | the collector | mind reader | skip the steps[all perm. active; sts for battle training]

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Springpaw’s head felt muddled. Lost in the visionary of her thoughts that kept hurdling themselves through the loneliness that drifted through the wind. Its strings feel plucked like a haunting melody of allies who’ve come and gone, washed away in the ever-swirling sandstorm of time. Each thought that coursed through her body felt like a hot rush of sand being poured onto her body all at once. Everything just kept bothering her; the current state of her clan, the lack of rest, and the lack of herbs. Sure, the storage had already begun to replenish itself from cats coming back with the herbs she required, but it was still a minor struggle for her to comprehend from just the mere fact that some cats were just far too negligent to listen to her orders. Was it just from the fact that she was just a mere apprentice? Or, was it the fact that she was nothing more than just the clan’s healers that certain cats thought that it would be nice to just be entirely ignorant of the medic’s orders? Such incidents had occurred with one of her patrols having failed to report back on time, only just fueling her disappointment to most of her clan-mates. Even with that lingering emotion, she still saw ThunderClan as her home; her birth clan. She was born there, and this was her clan and she’d do anything to keep it from succumbing to illness. Even if that meant that she’d take precatory precautions next time and go out of camp with the assistance of a few warriors to gather the right herbs that she needed. It was better to be safe than sorry, after all.

Her ringing thoughts grew to a close as she watched a familiar apricot-colored feline that seemed to notice her distant expression. Tired, fatigue-filled blue eyes locked with a lighter, powdery shade of blue as Strawberrymumble placed herself right next to the calico. Her words felt like an awash of white noise to her ears, but Springpaw allowed herself to remain intently focused on what the other oriental-shaped feline needed, to say, finding herself pitifully wordless at the best. There wasn’t a lot for Springpaw to say. She wanted to thank the molly for bringing back the herbs that she had requested for her to find, but the words felt tangled and twisted in the depths of her throat. Her words also brought a glimpse of sheer guilt into the molly’s belly, stabbing it deep within. Even if Springpaw had been handling everything due to her mentor being incapacitated, it didn’t mean that it just meant that she was just an all-knowing healer. Her knowledge only extended so far, and Strawberrymumble’s appreciation for her hard work and seeing if she needed anything only just made the calico fall into a bottomless pit of uncertainty. “I… thank you… for the… support, Strawberrymumble,” the medic began, finding the proper words unfolding off her tongue as her blue gaze glanced away from the other molly’s similar blue hues. “But I don’t need… any help… right now… I just… need to… make sure… everyone… is doing… alright… it’s my… duty as… a medicine cat… to make sure… everyone’s… health… both physical and… mentally… is at… a standing point.”

The statement in itself felt relatively harsh to state explicitly towards the soft and kindhearted feline, but it was true. Her biggest priority at the moment was making sure everyone who was injured during the raid was all patched up and healing well. The exhaustion that overcame it made it difficult to keep herself in check by just keeping an eye on every cat inside the clan, but she powered through. Cats can worry for her all they want, but her biggest priority is on them. She wasn’t going to just stand on the sidelines and allow them to perish just so easily. Both Eveningdance and Tawnykit died because she didn’t try hard enough and now she isn’t very keen to make the same mistake twice. Drizzlecloud wasn’t in the best state to help her assist in this hard time, but Springpaw managed to keep it together herself. She didn’t need help. She was perfectly capable of doing it on her own. Her focus on Strawberrymumble dwindled as she listened to Bumblestar, her blue eyes latching onto the cream-and-brown tabby’s frame as she listened to what her leader needed to point out, specifically about the aftermath of the raid first. It was disheartening to hear that they lost a few clan members during the battle, and Springpaw found herself briefly giving vigil for them momentarily before Bumblestar moved on. Hopefully, they withstood a good afterlife up in the stars… or wherever they went, in all honesty. Either they went to StarClan or The Dark Forest, or somewhere else, she hoped they at least had a comforting afterlife.

Bumblestar’s mention of cats being against ThunderClan once more brought the calico to feel boiling ire develop deep within her stomach. Hadn’t Bumblestar gone over something like this before at her last meeting with cats going against the clan? Springpaw could’ve sworn that was the case. If more cats were bearing more beetles in their brains than she could count, then the clan was better off without such narcissistic felines. Some cats just stick their noses in places where they don’t belong and that group did just that. Their foolery in trying to stop a raid is why they don’t belong in their home clan anymore. They made a choice that resulted in their dire consequences. Nonetheless, at least their life was spared, she supposed. It would mean less bloodshed would occur. Bumblestar’s mention of both Drizzleclouds and her attacks brought an unsettling feeling up her spine. Right, she hadn’t forgotten that those happy water-dweller killers tried to attack both her and Drizzlecloud right on the spot. Springpaw was still clearly displeased with their actions in that favor, especially for the molly who decided to attack her for no reason at all! The moderate gashes along her side still hadn’t been checked out yet, but that was because she focused her priority on her clan-mates first. She’ll do something about that later. But at least the kill-on-sight order was provoked, she supposed. Not as much drama would occur around Smallpines, then.

Her eyes danced over towards the duo of kits that rushed out to receive their naming ceremonies, and Springpaw couldn’t stop the genuine smile forming on her face. Her siblings finally getting their ceremonies, and she couldn’t be more proud of them. It was unfortunate that she never truly endured the fact to interact with her younger sisters and brothers, but maybe after they all became proper apprentices she’d withstand the chance to interact with them all individually, or together as a group. She could even teach them some herbs or two that would help them in the future! That would be something that the calico would be pleased to do. Just as she watched her siblings, Springpaw found herself noticing a familiar luxurious gray pelt of her mother, focusing up towards the direction of Dovefluff as she sent the molly a small, tired smile. At some point, Springpaw would be visiting her mother to hopefully have some spare time with her. It had been a good while since she had properly spoken with her mother about the recent events that occurred late, and she had dearly missed the feeling of her mother’s soft coat against her own.

@Fawn<3 [ here is a long lovely spring post for you ] @poppy [ just so dove saw spring smiling at her mama ]