Re: ShadowClan Clearing
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marigoldwhisper
Mudslide
She, Her\Warrior\18 moons\Shadowclan
"There's blood in the water. The quiet are restless, the silent are still"
Lybirds Lullaby [ACTIVE] Mind Reader [ACTIVE]
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- - - At the offer for a walk, Mudslide didn't react, mostly because something like that probably wouldn't happen unless she took Roachflare, herself, and Rookfire with her. Something she definitely didn't want to do. Then the thought of her apprentice came to her, and she perked up. Mosquitopaw. She could drag him along maybe, then they might be able to finish their tour and she'd also be able to hang out with Roachflare with no disruptions other than the occasional question from her apprentice, which she didn't mind. She'd have to arrange something... Rookfire was basically giving her permission, right? Okay then it was settled.
After the medicine cat apprentice said his last string of words, icy eyes darted up to look at him for a moment, even though she hated it. "Nothing stays dead." She replied simply, as though her words were fact, because in her life, they were. Her sister wasn't dead, that she was mostly confident in. She could feel her warm pelt against hers occasionally, as though she were beside her, see her in the ghost of a dream with the faint scent of a river, her form wispy and altered, her presence known but never in reach. She was a clan away from, her, and yet it felt like she was still here. Her mother wasn't dead either. Her body had probably long rotted away somewhere, but the mental strain she put on Mudslide remained.
"Are you crying? Crying is weak. Are you laughing? Laughing is weak. You ruined me, I never wanted you." words spun 'round and 'round and 'round in her head, ringing through her ears. She knew her monster of a mother didn't care, that was shown in how she abandoned her. Father? He tried. But trying is never enough. He wasn't smart enough, he wasn't strong enough, he didn't care. Why would he? Nocat cared about her. And as much as she had thoroughly adopted the mindset that she was completely fine with that, it tore her up from the inside, like an awful awful parasite. Her family wasn't dead. They built her walls, walls made to shield her heart.
Nothing ever stays dead.
And if these cats believed in life beyond the stars, that should be obvious to them. Nothing truly went away for good, and Mudslide had to harden herself to adapt to the wasteful life Starclan handed to her. Y'know, maybe she'd like those spirits more if they bothered to throw her a bone. Which, they kinda did.
Mudslide recalled asking for an angel, the nicest one they had. She was desperate, and she was lonely. Shadowclan was daunting and scary. Cats were too close, too far, and she craved connection but was so scared of the vulnerability. They scent her Roachflare. Well, Roachkit or Roachpaw at the time, she couldn't really remember his exact age. She was dead set on making sure they never took him away from her. Not like Squeaks. Not like her suffocating home.
Mudslide blinked. How much time had passed...? As cold wind slapped at her, the new-leaf reflections left her, and so did their bittersweet warmth. The warrior tensed. She needed to leave.
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mudslides reply to him attempting to assure her that the high rank and enforcer team were taking care of the issues theyve been having caught him off guard at first. 'nothing stays dead'?? what in stars name had mudslide seen in her life that would make her say something so...wrong. sure, cats could in rare cases call to their warrior ancestors to be given a second chance at life but that was nowhere near a reason to say nothing stayed dead.. "no idea what kinda experiences you've had but from what i know dead animals don' just raise ta' walk the earth again. 'specially not if theyve been eaten" rookfire replied with a small laugh, trying to imagine the mouse he had eaten earlier this day trying to claw its way back out of his stomach. or the badger he knew sleepysunrise had buried in the outskirts.. holdup that was actually kind of scary. trying to imagine mice and little critters coming back to life was amusing, considering the second death theyd have to suffer, but he would certainly not like to be faced with a used to be dead badger or something..
with a slight shake of his head, rookfire chased these thoughts away, focussing back on mudslide and trying to keep the conversation going. "sooo, d'ya still have family 'round? 've never seen ye with anyone besides roach" rookfire asked, entirely unaware that that was probably not something to just ask a cat he barely knew and also overlooking the way mudslide tensed. rook was a smart guy, he might even say so himself, but if he was in his head about something it was unlikely (to say the least) that he would notice any minor shifts in a cats mood. he was far better at spotting pain and picking up on the early wisps of sickly sweet illness than expressions anyway.
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