Originally Posted by Hexict
(soryr for the late reply, i've been busy :c)
(you kidding me? you guys are the ones that are doing great!)
Autumn orbs were heavy with despair was he watched Cricketpaw struggle to hold onto her breath and he desperately tried to cling to life. It was sad to think that someone as young and promising as Cricketpaw ws now lying on the ground in the territory, bleeding out from a wound that shouldn't be. Northpath felt sick as he thought back how he had just stood there - sure he couldn't help, but it didn't make him feel any better after witnessing the scene. She was using the last of her breath on Geckoleaf and the starry tabby knew that it was only a few heartbeats before she had no more breathes. But he had to admit that he understood how she felt, understood that she had to tell her mentor and loved one how she felt.
After all, when he was dying he had done the same thing with Zerosight.
His gaze fell to the ground for a moment as the young cat's breathing seized, a sign that he life had ended. The tabby knew that Cricketpaw's spirit would soon re-waken and would need his guidance to get to Starclan. He forced himself to look back upwards, seeing the starry figure out the russet molly making her way towards him. Northpath tried not to seem so heartbroken as he noted the look of utter disappointment and sadness in her blue orbs as she realized that she was in fact dead. Understanding what it's like to dye in such a way, he felt completely empathetic towards her. But he wasn't exactly sure what to say to her, if was suppose to comfort her after a violent death like that. Swallowing he tried to blink her stinging orbs as she grew closer to him.
It felt as though a claw scratched at his heart as she spoke to him. His orbs flicked towards the ground before returning her gaze. "Yes, I suppose you were..." what should I be saying? The tom shifted his weight as he tried to think of something to say to Cricketpaw. He was a Starclan cat,
how come he didn't see this coming?! And why didn't anyone else ever say anything? Isn't it Starclan's job to look after the living cats? So why would they just simply let Cricketpaw die like this, why would they take such a young cat? He felt anger and confusion by this. Even though he now resided in Starclan, he still wasn't sure how they knew things and why they didn't always act on some of their knowledge.
But as she looked back at her own dead body and her mentor crying over her, it only got worse. Cricketpaw began to fall apart, crying and stating how it wasn't fair and that she could be healed by her mentor. He weakly shook his head. "I know.... It's not fair, trust me I know," he mewed softly. "But you can't go back. Cricketpaw, you're already dead and I'm sorry. If she could heal you, then you wouldn't have died but that tom had done too much damage and you were beyond healing," Northpath didn't want to share his anger with Starclan at the moment with her, he didn't want her impression of their ancestors be filled with hate as he showed her to Starclan. "I am really sorry Cricketpaw.... I didn't know this would happen and I couldn't help while you were attacked. I'm sorry," the tom didn't know what else to say but that he was sorry about all of this.
Standing back, the grey warrior felt cold and uncomfortable. It was strange to feel cold - it was warm out and she had been running, leaving her panting and tired - but still, the situation seeped into her bones as she watched Geckoleaf's reaction. She wished that there was something she could say to her friend. Despite the fact that she could empathize with the medicine cat, the warrior found it difficult to figure out the right words. Mistfall wasn't so good in such emotional situations and had trouble comforting somethings. Lately it seemed that her friends needed some comfort, but she was sure that she was little help to them, especially concerning this matter. Mistfall felt as though she should go over to Geckoleaf and try to calm her down, but the tabby seemed to far in her grief and was burying her face in Cricketpaw's neck and seem to lose any care in the world at the moment. She swallowed back emotions at Geckoleaf's words to Cricketpaw, telling her that she loved her apprentice and for her to never forget it.
As the medicine cat began to scream at Starclan for this treachery, the warrior couldn't help but feel both pity and a concern for Geckoleaf as well as the clan Mistfall. It was unnerving as she wondered if this incident would cause Geckoleaf to turn away from Starclan and her grief would lead her to have clouded judgement. What if Riverclan just lost their connection to Starclan? If we have no one to read omens from our ancestors, then what are we to do? Would Riverclan be doomed? The roll of a medicine cat was such an important one. It involved being the bridge between Starclan and the living - to recieve dreams, signs and messages from them that they believed the clans needed to know! She had heard that some medicine cats didn't really believe or acknowledge their ancestors in the same way as many of their clan-mates do, and she wondered if that would be the same for Geckoleaf because of all this.
But she knew that this was deeper then just their connection to Starclan. Their medicine - her friend - might not mentally recover from this. She had sch a fragile state of mind, especially so soon after a mental break-down. If her mind shattered, then there might not be any healing for her to do and she could end up beyond recovery. Even if she could be help, Mistfall knew that she wouldn't be enough to help her beloved friend and wasn't sure if anyone else would be up to doing something like that, to be able to help Geckoleaf after everything she's seen and been through. The medicine cat never seemed to tend to her own scars and just helped heal her clan-mates, but she was in need of some healing in order to help her. To be there for her support and actually be able to help her for something more permanent instead of a temporary fix.
But Mistfall knew that she wasn't such a cat for Geckoleaf, and that fact only made her feel more useless.
Ears perking as the medicine cat spoke again, but this time less angered. At first she thought that she might be speaking to her, but after hearing Geckoleaf's words and noticing her staring off she realized that she wasn't speaking to Mistfall. The warrior was confused - and still on edge - and whirled around in order to see whom her friend might be addressing. Brow furrowed in even further confusion upon seeing no one she turned back to Geckoleaf and became even more worried. Who was she talking to? And by 'watch over her', could she be talking about Cricketpaw? But that doesn't answer the first question... the warrior hoped that the grief wasn't making her friend go insane. She hadn't been able to see Northpath nor smell anyone else around them so to her knowledge there was no one there, which left her to believe that maybe her friend's sanity was being tested by the death of Cricketpaw.
Blinking as her friend turned her attention to Mistfall now. The warrior shook her head to clear thoughts in order to focus more on what her friend wished to say, wishing to be at least some help to her. The emotional toll of the whole situation seemed to take full affect on Mistfall now that her friend cried while looking into her pale orbs. Mistfall felt weakened. Although she had watched Geckoleaf weep over her apprentice's body, the grey warrior had intentionally tried not to look at Cricketaw herself, but now she forced herself to look down a the spotted body. There was a lot of blood, as to be expected after the strong scent of it, but she felt a bit sick. Mistfall didn't shy away from fighting - mostly due to her own darker side - but it was so much worse when it was someone innocent, especially someone young like Cricketpaw and a cat that didn't know to truly defend themselves like a medicine cat. This really shouldn't have happened... the warrior thought as she shifted her weight and her tail twitched.
The grey molly stiffened as Geckoleaf locked gazes with her. Mistfall was uncertain if she should do something, like go over to her grieving friend or maybe Geckoleaf preferred to be alone? If she wants to spend time alone, then I'll let her do so when I know she's safe in camp. But the warrior then noticed the medicine cat's muscles moving as she tried to force herself up. "Geckoleaf," she mewed in a quiet yet sharp tone and took a step towards the fiery tabby, seeing how weak from grief she was. She stopped as her friend made her way towards her in weak movements. Mistfall wasn't sure why Geckoleaf was trying to get to her, but she wished to help the medicine cat nonetheless. So the grey molly took another step forward but before she could go any further the tabby crumpled before her. "Geckoleaf!" Her voice became louder as she rushed to be by Geckoleaf's side. Mistfall crouched beside the tabby and listened as she spoke. The grey molly tried to seem strong for her friend and gave a small nod. "I know Geckoleaf, I know. But we have to get you back to camp," Mistfall wouldn't be able to get both Cricketpaw and Geckoleaf back in on trip, so she would have to make sure that Geckoleaf got to safety - and a much needed rest - before going back out to retrieve Cricketpaw's body in order for her clan-mates to show their respect for her. "I'll help you to camp," the warrior tried to help Geckoleaf back onto her paws, planning on support Geckoleaf all the way back to camp.
--
Northpath's gaze passed Cricketpaw and noticed Geckoleaf as she seemed to see him. The tom was surprised that she had noticed him, but was honestly a bit glad that she did. He hoped that this would give the grieving mentor some peace if she knew he was here. The tom also hoped that she would hate Starclan for this - but at the same time he could understand her anger she held for them. He wished that it hadn't happened like this, wished that he could have helped and that others in Starclan would have done something about this and saved the innocent apprentice. As the tabby watched Geckoleaf plead for him to watch over Cricketpaw he gaze held the same sadness and pain as when he looked at Cricketpaw herself, and he gave a strong nod as he promised to watch over the deceased apprentice.
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