Quote:
Originally Posted by Charmer
During Nightpaw's time in the clan, no cat had talked with her about the Dark Forest. These words were strange to her, but what she managed to gather was that cats from there had killed other cats. They must be another clan... but a clan of cruel and awful cats! How could any cat kill another? To Nightpaw, the concept was completely beyond her. Why would any cat want to hurt another? Didn't they have enough problems already from other animals? An image of open, slavering jaws flashed through her mind and she shuddered, shaking her head to banish the image. "How horrible..." she said to Daypaw. "That's so unfair that your father was taken from you like that. I don't really remember my parents at all, I went to live with my housefolk when I was so little...er, twolegs," Nightpaw corrected herself, using the term that she'd heard clancats using. "But it must have been so hard..." Nightpaw thought for a long moment, a strange mix of gratitude that Daypaw was sharing this with her and sadness that they had been through so much mixing within her. "Is that why you're so sad?" she asked the medicine cat, point blank. She wasn't just talking about now. From the moment she had managed to have a conversation with Daypaw without consciousness fading, she had felt it coming off the golden-colored cat like waves, a deep, unrelenting sadness masked by bitterness. "I wish I'd met you earlier. Maybe I could have helped you not be so sad." The little black shecat butted her head against the medicine cat's neck, nuzzling as into their fur, just to let them feel that she was there, really there for them in that moment. "Is there anything I can do for you?" Nightpaw asked her friend. "You know there's nothing I wouldn't do for you. I mean, you're the reason I'm even alive and here after all." As far as Nightpaw was concerned, she owed Daypaw her life. She was sure the medicine cat didn't take her seriously. After all, she was a young, former kittypet who could barely hunt, didn't know how to fight, and probably came across as a happy-go-lucky airhead. The shecat sagged a little. And why shouldn't they think that? I can't fix any of this. I can't do anything.
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Is that why youre so sad?
The question lingered in their mind for awhile before they replied. their father died when they were young, they couldn't really remember what life was like before that. they weren't close to their father, they didnt actually care that he died no matter how cold that sounded,it was how they felt. maybe after experiencing death they felt numb. they didnt show a lot of emotion, and if they did it was to a select few of cats. they didnt know why they didnt eat, they didnt know why they were like this, they didnt know why they stressed themselves out so much. they'd didnt know why they acted to cold and distant towards others. they didnt know. did they come off as sad? they looked towards the ground before looking back up again with a distant look on their face, forming a shrug. they felt the small nuzzle to their neck, a unfamiliar feeling of closeness came over them. They leaned against Nightpaw, letting their weight rest against her in a relaxed motion; Daypaw being relaxed was a a rare sight. ¨I dont consider myself sad. I consider myself numb.¨ the words were simple yet they held so much. it was hard to explain to someone that you felt everything but nothing at all. that you were filled with so much energy yet you are just so mentally and physically tired. they,daypaw, felt nothing. leaning against nightpaw they stared blankly into the clearing. they wouldnt describe themselves as sad,or unhappy, or neglected. they had things to live for. they had acornfall, they had geckoleaf,nightpaw, and a few others. they had cats taking care of them, yet they felt like they were still at step one. perhaps if was selfish to think that way, or dumb to feel this when they were being given love they werent given when they were young. it was both confusing and exhausting.
Quote:
Originally Posted by fenic!
"...kits?" russetstar couldn't say he was prepared for that next sentence, the next statement- what was whisperblaze talking about? "...but we don't have kits- where did we get kits?" he exclaimed-- his expression both suddenly worried and happy-- KITS with WHISPERBLAZE-- that was an idea he couldn't say no to, no matter how stressed he got or how busy he was, because he could talk about how much he loved his mate for hours. he really, truly, cared for whisperblaze, and was more than willing to take care of their kits together. pale blue eyes shining in anticipating as he stared into whisperblaze's brighter ones, he couldn't help but wait for his next response a bit anxiously.
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whispers eyes widened when he realized...he didnt tell russet about the kits? oh god. ¨After..Shiverkits passing,¨ he could remember it clearly. he could remember the look on the queens face when she said he wasnt going to last overnight.he didnt. he could remember feeling a pang of loss again, losing more kits. he had never met his birth kits, they could be dead for all he knew. ¨I went back to where I found him-to grieve. I found...four more kits there.¨ he explained, a small smile forming on his face at the mere thought of his children.¨I found them all by a single tree, so I named them after different ones. Theyre old enough to not need milk so Ive been staying in the nursery as a queen to take care of them. weve been so busy im surprised it slipped my mind,¨ usually toms wouldn't be considered ¨queens¨ but whisper had a natural mothering instinct. the need to care for and nurture. looking up at russet the mere thought of clawpaw and her words slipped from his mind easily, resting his forehead against his mates,¨we have kits, were fathers, my love,¨ he mewed gently,¨theyve been antsy to meet you.¨