[Undertaker]

Originally Posted by Arie

'An explosion of colours and shapes.' It was interesting to listen to, every cat she'd asked this very strange question so far seemed to be giving her different views on it. His chuckle did make her let out her own laugh though and Doepaw flickered her ears in mild amusement. "Guess... you've not met... many blind cats... either." It was a strange thing... she'd only met one so far in her life. Quailsnap from Riverclan and he hadn't exactly been made blind voluntarily. Being born blind provided challenges and difficulties from the start... but she had gotten used to it.
As well as you could considering the circumstances. Learning how to function without sight without already having attuned senses was something she was blessed not having to go through. Contemplating his explaining of sight, was truly perplexing to her. She could smell the flowers, could feel the sun on her back and register the sensation of when it was light outside and when it was dark with the little bit of light perception she still had remaining in her eyes.
The only thing she struggled with was the sky... which usually was something she preferred to not be able to sense. She wished she could, that her senses somehow could stretch vertically instead of horizontally. Yet it was not to be the case and it was most certainly where sighted cats had the advantage of blind cats. If there was no movement, no sound of breath, nothing alerting her to anything in the sky... she would never realise it was there.
"All of these... things can be seen... scented...felt and... tasted," she murmured quietly. Sight... it was a terrifying concept. The thought of grooming yourself and being actually able to see the mess she was making for the fur had her flicking her ears. It was all so strange the way they described everything they talked about, trying to just... avoid the harsh facts and pampering it up to help each other fill in the holes that as lacked. "It is... strange to think... something others rely... on so heavily... is a bad thing. Something that is... a disadvantage to lack... being a disadvantage in itself." Yet there was the same issues with her hearing... Sounds could and would lie, they could be manipulated to create an opportunity for other movement and just as loud sounds to be produced.
"I don't know... how well seeing and... hearing works... but... my sister was deaf. It was her... downfall. Being unable... to hear the hawk's swoop." It was said in a quiet yet strong voice. She couldn't let this fear... of birds of all things become apparent. She had her goals and working around that phobia was one of them. Learning how to manage it, how to defeat it.
Yet at Beastspark's question the apprentice let out a harsh laugh. "I was... a warrior for a total of.. 2 seconds. I was.. not ready by then... had not even got... to taking... my assessment. Had been out... on a hunt with Flintspirit... then the next day... warrior ceremony." It was frustrating for her still to think about. She had not been ready despite being given the name, and then getting demoted all over... Not exactly something she had liked. "Yes... Despite how well... I hear... fighting has never... been my strong suit." It was harder for her to learn than any other area of expertise. For hunting where patterns and knowledge was useful she could just spend hours on listening and learning on her own. It was not like that for battle training, rather the contrary. It was something that REQUIRED sight in order to be able to perfect. Or even just to learn.
It was... harder for her to learn. A lot of moves - from what Flintspirit had described during their training sessions - had been based on movements in the air, the flash of a paw... Things she had no time to register nor observe without the ability to see.
"I can... fight. But it... is harder for me... than hunting... by a long shot. Hunting I can... learn on my own. Develop my own... techniques and abilities to listen and... hunt with precision. Fighting... doesn't fit that... well into... being blind. I can... but it takes longer... for me to learn... how to fight than anything...else." Time... time... It was all about time. Just time. It took time for everything, but her knowledge of fighting was the one that took the longest. "A lot of... fighting doesn't... make sounds... nor is capable of being... felt. It makes... it a whole other... challenge to overcome."
Because that was what it was. A challenge. A jump she could not yet jump, but she would overcome. A stepping stone to the future she was aiming for. It would be a struggle, that she knew, bu it would show everyone else that despite taking longer, just because you could not see... It didn't hold you back. "Movements are... not hearble. But rather... based on visuals. Doesn't lend itself... to not being able to see the.. movements." She truly hoped she was able to explain it in a way that made sense for the deputy and not just... another confusing round of analogies like they'd done just moments before. "So yes... I can fight. But... not as well.. as anyone with sight," she rounded up.

@Arie [figured I'd get this wrapped up so we can focus on the training]

"Well, we have a blind cat, she's a queen and Icestar's sister I believe. Citrusflower. You'd probably like her if you met her. I don't hang around in the nursery all that much so I'm not super friendly with her, but I'm sure she wouldn't mind you visiting if you'd like to talk to her." Not that he was imply anything like that, but maybe she'd make a good friend out of the queen. They had another blind apprentice, but she vanished not too long after her mentor did, the same with...

He took in a deep breath of air and let it out while tuning back into what Doepaw was saying about her sister. She left her sister behind in ThunderClan, the thought of willingly leaving kin behind anywhere brought a deep sadness that was too personal for his liking. It only grew worse hearing that her sister was taken by a hawk. Beastspark always been a little more in tune with his emotions then he would have liked. It made him feel as soft as a kittypet. He really didn't see him being anywhere near fit to lead this clan after Icestar if he was lucky either his life would end in battle or Icestar would come to her senses and find a better deputy to serve her before that time came.

"Even without sight, scents or words, sound lets you experience the world in a special way." Sights were beautiful he knew that from first hand, but as far as he was concerned if he was unable to hear the cry of the birds in the morning, the crackling of pine needles beneath his paws. the laughter the came from the nursery. His life would be so bleak and lifeless, it might be extreme to him, but life wouldn't be worth living with noise in it. Dead silence would kill him, having nothing but his thoughts to listen to would be such a cruel way to live.

"You went hunting, that was your assessment?" Beastspark was shocked learning that all it took was a hunting trip in ThunderClan to be made a warrior. That was sad and probably why ThunderClan got such a thrashing from them.

"You're going to have to work on that. The only way to become a warrior in ShadowClan is to prove you've got the right to stuff for it. Icestar monitors every single assessment personally, pitting mentor, and apprentice against each other with claw and teeth being allowed. So long as the underbelly, eyes, and neck aren't target anything free game." He sounded more concerned than before.

The last thing he wanted to Icestar to take back her decision and kick the molly out for her lack of skill. As she explained why it was so difficult, Beastspark had already worked out why fighting was so laborious for her. She couldn't see when the attack was coming, most attacks don't make a sound so that didn't work. This was most likely going to keep him up tonight, ah well, food for thought.

"Yeah, makes sense. I'll work something out for you in my spare time." He grinned, who knew it might be fun. He loved anything to with battle so working out a fighting technique for the blind would be a challenge he enjoyed.

"Oops! I'm rambling." Beastspark meowed, finally noticing how much time had passed since he started chatting with her. "You should probably get settled in and getting to know your new clanmates." His tail sweeps the ground, gathering pine needles he was going to have to run around in a circle to clean out because his tail hated him later. He might have to go find a little Rabbit and see if he'd be willing to clean them out again. "Do you anything else from me?"