WindClan: Life Before 2023's Fire

[Doodle]

Originally Posted by Nighty

The cream colored molly trotted at a brisk pace, falling a slight bit behind. Her eight moons in the nursery dealing with hers kits had taken a toll on her. She was more plump now, having only to watch over kits, sleep, and eat. She had only been out of the nursery for a moon and it was starting to get better. She was easing back into the habit of hunting and running and fighting. Her dark blue eyes glittered with kindness as she caught the tom looking at her, and she returned the friendly glance. She put on the extra effort and caught up to him, falling into step with the brown tinted tom. As she walked along in silence, ideas on what to say flowed through her mind like the river near Riverclan border. It felt awkward for her to walk along in silence, nothing ti say or talk about, so she mulled it over in her mind. But she was out going enough she just decided in some if the first topics that came to mind.

She could talk about the weather. Nope too blatant in showing her boredom. She could mention he looked handsome. What the heck she knew he already had Firesparks. That would just be taken wrong. Just no. She just needed to start somewhere. But at the same time she was enjoying the stroll through the territory, the walking the excersise. That was it. "Hey, Owlspark, would you be up for a run? My legs could use a bit of stretching. Race you to the rock pile over there?" She asked him, turning her gaze to look at the rocks that laid much closer to the Thunderclan border. Far enough for them to get a good amount of speed, but short enough that Gorseflower herself would not be rendered completely breathless and winded by it.

Owlspark's ears perked up in interest as the molly spoke, breaking the silence between them. He was very grateful for that; he just hoped his quietness hadn't made him seem odd in any way. "Of course," was his immediate reply as he eyed the rocks Gorseflower pointed out. He wondered briefly if he should be polite and courteous by letting her win this race- but it wasn't like he was the fastest cat in the clan, anyways. Even just putting in normal effort would most likely only be slightly faster than the other cat. The tom hadn't been built for speed, more so for muscle, but he guessed that was the way it was, when you weren't clan born. He paused in their walk, wanting to give her a fair start at least. "Ok, on the count of three," the tabby started, tail waving slowly behind him. "One, two... three!"

At his count, he put on a bout of speed to get him started before settling down into a steady pace for the short run. He wasn't much of a competitive cat, and so didn't have his heart set on winning. Rather he didn't worry about it and decided to let it be what it would; his only focus was on reaching the spot without crashing into the rocks. He didn't think that Firesparks would appreciate it if her mate injured himself by running into rocks- that would be a tad embarrassing for the both of them. So, when the tom decided that maybe he was getting a tad too close, he abruptly slowed his speed down and dug his paws into the ground to stop himself. He wound up being a couple tail lengths away from the designated end zone still, and trotted the rest of the way to the rocks- certainly not the best run he'd done, but oh well. He had reached the area, after all, but due to being so close to Thunderclan territory Owlspark was a bit on edge. His green eyes raked the border, hoping that they wouldn't come across any warriors from the other clan. Relations between the two were seriously lacking at the moment, and he couldn't trust them not to attack on sight. In fact he didn't quite know how they would react if Thunderclanners saw them; the tabby hadn't seen any of the other clan since all that had gone down. Once he was satisfied that no one would hop out of the shadows and attack, he turned back to look at Gorseflower. "Well, it looks all clear at least, so we might as well get to it," he suggested, already trying to pick up any scent of prey. This rock surely should have attracted some smaller prey, which he was hoping for as he wasn't the best hare catcher in the clan.

[spade]

Originally Posted by Lonestar23

"Well, I'm older and wiser now. But you want to know the real secret to my success?" Aspenpaw looked around for a moment, to see who was listening before he leaned in to her good ear as though about to tell her his deepest, darkest secret. His expression was a hundred percent serious, not even his whiskers quivering with the strain of remaining serious. "I don't run when it's muddy. That really helps," He whispered. Near the end of his sentence, his voice began to strain and then his whiskers twitched with amusement. Aspenpaw hoped he wasn't tickling her ear, nor bothering her with his jokes. Somehow, it was easier to joke around Moonpaw. A good deal of the "misfits" that he talked to, it was like walking on crisp leaves and trying not to break them under his paws. He had to do it delicately, softly, and have a lot of luck to keep them from cracking. But, he found ways to make them feel better. Except for... Tawnypaw. While she was one of his close friends, he still didn't feel as though she completely trusted him. Or as though she would ever really completely trust him.

And that hurt, just a little bit... he didn't understand why. Sometimes it felt as though she didn't even really like him. She somewhat trusted him, that was for sure, but Aspenpaw felt that somewhere along the way, their friendship had gone downhill and had never returned to where it was. Moonpaw's voice seemed to lower a little when she spoke again, telling him that she was okay with his staring. Really? He would have thought that it would bother her. She must get stared at all the time, and there was no way that they were polite glances either. Some of the cats in the Clan could be very offensive when given the opportunity. Though, he knew they most likely didn't mean it. Some of them were good cats deep down. Others? Well... Aspenpaw always tried to look for the best in everyone, but he hadn't found much good in them. "Glad it's alright with you," He half-purred with a smile. The injury in itself was hard not to look at. But Aspenpaw's mind was already calculating it as just 'part of her face,' as though it had never not been there. The untouched part of her features was beautiful. Unique, at least. It was easy to see why Tawnypaw praised this apprentice so much. Before now, he had wondered what was so good about Moonpaw.

Now? Yep, he could definitely think of a few descriptive words to praise her as well. And honestly, it wasn't really a surprise. Anyone that the she cat praised so readily and was so fond of had to have some good qualities in them. His smile faltered for a moment when Moonpaw spoke again. Oh. Not the right trait, huh? Must've sounded a little weird, I know I would feel weird if some cat I just met complimented me like that, He thought with a nervous purr rumbling in his throat. Even though it had been meant as nothing more then a compliment, Aspenpaw still felt a little awkward. "Well, Tawnypaw's been praising you so much it's hard for me to think of some original compliments," He laughed with that smile coming back. He had meant it, though. Both inside and out - Moonpaw was a beautiful cat. Though, if she wasn't as comfortable with him saying that, he wouldn't. He would just... think of normal things to say. It didn't seem like Moonpaw really needed building up, which was what Aspenpaw was good at. He was used to building others up. So what did you do when you met a cat who had the most cheerful personality, even after an accident?

"Sure! Then you can see how much my paw-eye coordination has improved first hand," The tom mewed with a laugh. But he was truly hoping that they would be able to do that sometime. Maybe he would be able to see how Tawnypaw acted around the black and white cat. There had to be some difference, otherwise she wouldn't be so heavily praised. And he was eager to see what it was so that he could hopefully get the same results.

With them sitting close together, Moonpaw felt the twitch in Aspenaw's whispers before his amused chuckling gave him away. A purr began to rumble in her own chest and before long, her own features were twisted in laughter. His ability to go from completely dead serious to snickering in just a few seconds truly impressed her as she laughed alongside him, the smile stretching wide across her face, teeth glinting in the sun. "Oh my, I feel like you should share that secret with Blazingstar! The Clan would really benefit from such sage advice!" Again, another bout of laughter erupted from the young molly, and this time her whole body seemed to shake with it, shoulders moving up and down, whiskers twitching. Her good eye dazzled with humor, eventually calming down enough and resorting to an amused smile directed at Aspenpaw.

The ache in her heart of missing Tawnypaw, her best friend, was beginning to grow dull now since she had met Aspenpaw. Of course, she could never truly forget about the other feline, but it was nice to regain a variety of friends back. Most of the apprentices in the Clan avoided her nowadays, or seemed to walk on eggshells around her. It was painfully obvious that they wanted to ask her about the incident, but none ever did for fear of it being "too personal". Moonpaw silently begged for the opposite though; she wished her Clanmates would ask, and understand, and then resume to treating her like a normal WindClan apprentice. So with Aspenpaw's regular joking, and Tawnypaw sticking with her, she was grateful to have some of her denmates still by her side.

"I really do appreciate the compliment though," she reassured him, resting her tail momentarily on his shoulder as she looked into his own gaze with her soft blue one. Gratitude shown clearly across her expression, and she hoped that those words would be enough to convey how touched she felt by his words of affirmation. Despite having just met her, and only going off of what a biased Tawnypaw had to say, Moonpaw felt a warmth wrap around her to know that there were still some cats who thought she was... Beautiful. That's the word he used; beautiful, she thought, smiling faintly at him as she let her tail drop, instinctively wrapping it back around her paws. A few brief moments of silence hung in between the two apprentices, and Moonpaw felt something shift inside of her - an undetectable, yet still there, little flame flicker to life.

Moonpaw's sweet smile soon turned into a full on grin as Aspenpaw branched off of her "territory expedition" suggestion with herself and Tawnypaw. She was almost certain that the three would get along extremely well, having no problems in the territory. Though she was excited to go out with just the apprentices, she wasn't about to put it past Blazingstar to send a warrior or two out with them; after all, he was keeping a close eye on her ever since the attack. "And if Blazingstar decides to send escorts, we can always loose them. Tawnypaw has the best ideas for things like that," Moonpaw mused, a gleam of mischief dancing in her good eye as she smirked towards Aspenpaw, leaning close as she spoke as if she was telling him a secret.

[Mayflower]

Originally Posted by CandyFlossCat

"Er...I don't know....but er..I don't want to make a fool of myself and say what I think your saying..?" Hareleap mewed, blinking.

Paleheart laughed sweetly and licked his cheek. "Go ahead, we made big enough fools of ourselves in pur apprenticeship." The she cat smiled, looking at her mate.

[Starfall]

Originally Posted by Empress Of Evil

The warrior could tell from his tone of voice that Blazingstar wasn’t too pleased with her. Whether it be he didn’t like her or her presence. Whichever it was, Winterwisp clearly did not care. She could be wherever she liked whenever she liked. She couldn’t say that she wanted to be here, but she’d come anyway and she wasn’t about to let some leader change her mind so easily. As the orange she-cat spoke, she turned to face her and glared at Emberdust instead. “Faith? In you? Nev- “ Her words were cut off as the warrior kicked her in the leg. Winterwisp hissed loudly, unsheathing her claws angrily. Did this cat want to have a clawed up face? She was ready to snap at the warrior when once again, she was interrupted before she had the chance to.
“Well you can go ahead and ask your mother about that. My mother’s too dead to answer,” Winterwisp snorted. There was no pain or sadness in her eyes as she spoke those words, rather there was just an even colder look in her pale green gaze. The she-cat was not yet aware that her mother was still alive as were all her family members. And what she would never guess was how one of her siblings was right here in the same clan as her.
Her attention switched once again back to Blazingstar as he spoke. She prepared herself to flatten her ears against her head and put on an even harsher smile. But there was no need as a smile of glee quickly flew onto her maw. The smile seemed unnatural and foreign on her face but the she-cat would never be able to tell unless she looked at her reflection in a pool of water. Even so, Winterwisp could already feel how strange the smile was one her face. She never smiled. And when she did, it looked extremely unnatural. A scowl reappeared on her face as Emberdust spoke against his words. Although she was mad at the warrior for making the leader stay, she felt relieved to be scowling once more. It was as if a scowl was as natural as a smile would be for the average cat. It felt right and it felt comfortable.
“Alright, well you wasted enough of my time already. What do you want?” Winterwisp snapped, digging her claws impatiently into the dirt. She wanted the she-cat to just speak so she could listen and stalk off to a quiet and undisturbed corner of the camp. The warrior wasn’t sure how much longer she could stand being so social.

@starfall @Suspiciousmindz

Originally Posted by Suspiciousmindz

@Empress Of Evil @starfall

Blazingstar stopped in his tracks and once again turned his attention towards his sister and her friend. He blinked a few times, distraught. "Why exactly were you waiting on me?" he inquired, tilting his ears in their direction. It was the same question Winterwisp asked just a few heartbeats before him. With that, he sat himself down where he was. Now he was about a tail-length away from them. Still the tension and negativity radiating off Winterwisp made his fur want to tingle along his spine. He didn't allow it to happen, of course. He had to look professional in the clearing... well most times.

The ginger feline shot Winterwhisp, what most would describe as, an annoyed look before she returned her amber gaze back upon her brother, she wasn't even going to bother with her 'friends' sass at the moment, she had bigger things to put into motion. "Calm down you two, honestly, a bunch of kits you two are." she scolded, her tail tip flicked as she said it, she too was awaiting to state her plans aloud but she had to wait until she got both the cats attention, it was vital that they were both listening. After a few seconds passed Emberdust finally decided that now was the best time to propose her idea, and by propose she meant force. "Blazingstar, its about time you got yourself mate, with all the recent events involving Thunderclan I swear you've got a few white patches." she stated, fake amusement once again laced her words. "And you, Winterwhisp." she began, turning her cold, almost lifeless amber optics upon the black and white Molly "You were surprised that my brother didn't actually detest you." she stated. She gave the two a smirk, which she had come to realize meant she had a plan. "Why dont the two of you become mates, mother would approve of her brother." she suggested, her amber hues flicking over to her brother momentarily before they once again zeroed in on Winterwhisp, "Opposites do attract after all." she stated, oh, oh yes, this was going swimmingly.

[wickedvirtues]

Originally Posted by Milky Way

Fairyheart laughed sweetly and licked his cheek. "Go ahead, we made big enough fools of ourselves in pur apprenticeship." The she cat smiled, looking at her mate.

Hareleap swallowed, his eyes meeting hers with hesitance. "I'm thinking you want kits..with all this family talk, but..It might just be me." He mewed, giving a small shrug, smiling slightly. His tail twitched as he hoped he wasn't being mouse-brained.

[SkyBreeze]

Anyone roleplay?:
Skybreeze sat in the clearing, doing nothing.

[lone]

Originally Posted by Brooklyn Trees

Moonpaw closed her eyes as he confirmed that he had not been lying to her. It hurt for him to say that. Probably more than it would have hurt for him to have sneered at her and laughed.

The pale-coated feline choked silently as he continued.
Why is that so hard for you to believe? She didn't know why she had taken so much pain and caused so much for something that didn't exist. She had hurt her friend, she could see that now.
Seeing him hurting, it... It hurt more than time could tell. She wanted to start crying, but stayed her tears. No. No crying.

She stayed silent for a long moment, not wanting to open her mouth or to begin to cry. She needed him to stop hurting. She needed to be okay with all of this.
"I..." She broke off, swallowing thickly as she bit back the beginnings of uncertain tears.
"I could never find this funny."
Moonpaw looked at Couragepaw, eyes running along his flank before falling to the ground again.
"It hurts me too."

She fell silent again, looking off into the distance. She didn't know what to do. She couldn't bring herself to speak anymore in a calm manner.

Maybe the only thing that hurt more then having her deny he meant any of it was hearing her say that it hurt her too. Couragepaw remembered wanting to protect Moonpaw from hurt. Was he just... causing more of it? The tom looked down at the ground, his eyes flickering with pain as he wondered what he was supposed to do next. Where did you go from here? There was so much that he could have said, so much that he could have protected her from, but instead he was silent. His paws were fidgety, and his eyes flitted around nervously as though he wasn't quite sure what to say or do now. Because where... where on earth... were you supposed to go from here? It seemed he had reached yet another crossroads. He could leave her alone and stay safe from the pain of standing there and seeing her, but knowing that they couldn't be together - or he could stay and fight for her again. It seemed he was fighting against her and for her at the same time. He knew she couldn't really think that he was lying. So whatever this denial was, Couragepaw was pretty sure that he hadn't had that much to do with it.

"Moonpaw, I - why... why do you think I would lie to you? Wh - why is that even a, a possiblity in your mind?"

His voice was growing somewhat frustrated. Did she really believe that he would lie to her? Just like that? He was growing frustrated, and he knew it. So Couragepaw stopped. His stance became less agitated, and the fire left his eyes. "Sorry. I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that." There had to be something that he could say that wasn't dangerous, wouldn't hurt her more, but would get his point across. How could she even begin to believe that he would ever, ever lie to her? However that worked, he was hurt by it. It just didn't make sense. It just didn't. And he was afraid of it. Afraid that maybe, this was a foreshadowing of what their future would be like anyways. With neither one trusting the other, and lies, and- no. This wasn't her. This wasn't his Moonpaw, this wasn't his best friend. It couldn't be. Before, she had trusted him. It had all started so stupidly that Couragepaw was still blaming himself. How could he have been so completely idiotic? Whatever he had thought when he had told her about Fernpaw, now it was still casting shadows on the future. Hopefully it would still be their future. Someday... somehow.

[lone]

Originally Posted by Lilly

With them sitting close together, Moonpaw felt the twitch in Aspenaw's whispers before his amused chuckling gave him away. A purr began to rumble in her own chest and before long, her own features were twisted in laughter. His ability to go from completely dead serious to snickering in just a few seconds truly impressed her as she laughed alongside him, the smile stretching wide across her face, teeth glinting in the sun. "Oh my, I feel like you should share that secret with Blazingstar! The Clan would really benefit from such sage advice!" Again, another bout of laughter erupted from the young molly, and this time her whole body seemed to shake with it, shoulders moving up and down, whiskers twitching. Her good eye dazzled with humor, eventually calming down enough and resorting to an amused smile directed at Aspenpaw.

The ache in her heart of missing Tawnypaw, her best friend, was beginning to grow dull now since she had met Aspenpaw. Of course, she could never truly forget about the other feline, but it was nice to regain a variety of friends back. Most of the apprentices in the Clan avoided her nowadays, or seemed to walk on eggshells around her. It was painfully obvious that they wanted to ask her about the incident, but none ever did for fear of it being "too personal". Moonpaw silently begged for the opposite though; she wished her Clanmates would ask, and understand, and then resume to treating her like a normal WindClan apprentice. So with Aspenpaw's regular joking, and Tawnypaw sticking with her, she was grateful to have some of her denmates still by her side.

"I really do appreciate the compliment though," she reassured him, resting her tail momentarily on his shoulder as she looked into his own gaze with her soft blue one. Gratitude shown clearly across her expression, and she hoped that those words would be enough to convey how touched she felt by his words of affirmation. Despite having just met her, and only going off of what a biased Tawnypaw had to say, Moonpaw felt a warmth wrap around her to know that there were still some cats who thought she was... Beautiful. That's the word he used; beautiful, she thought, smiling faintly at him as she let her tail drop, instinctively wrapping it back around her paws. A few brief moments of silence hung in between the two apprentices, and Moonpaw felt something shift inside of her - an undetectable, yet still there, little flame flicker to life.

Moonpaw's sweet smile soon turned into a full on grin as Aspenpaw branched off of her "territory expedition" suggestion with herself and Tawnypaw. She was almost certain that the three would get along extremely well, having no problems in the territory. Though she was excited to go out with just the apprentices, she wasn't about to put it past Blazingstar to send a warrior or two out with them; after all, he was keeping a close eye on her ever since the attack. "And if Blazingstar decides to send escorts, we can always loose them. Tawnypaw has the best ideas for things like that," Moonpaw mused, a gleam of mischief dancing in her good eye as she smirked towards Aspenpaw, leaning close as she spoke as if she was telling him a secret.

"I know, I've become so very wise in my old age. I'll have to have a talk with Blazingstar about my wisdom - I should be advising all the younger apprentices," Aspenpaw laughed, his whiskers twitching with amusement. It was fun to joke around with Moonpaw. She was one of the easiest cats to talk to that he had ever met. Maybe even the only easy one, it was hard when you were speaking with a damaged cat. You had to take everything into consideration. Not that Aspenpaw wasn't good at that, but he did have some trouble - but Moonpaw acted as though nothing had happened. So the feline would do the same, just act as though there were nothing wrong. And maybe, her injury didn't bother her. She was so cheerful. How does she do it? It was like life had never been better for the white and black patterned apprentice, and he wondered how come she seemed like that. His expression was friendly, and calm, but he wanted to ask.

After all the joking that had been done, though, wouldn't it be somewhat of an awkward subject change? He felt as though it would. Maybe the subject would come up again... later. Hearing Moonpaw change the subject back to when he had called her "beautiful," the tom felt somewhat awkward. But she had appreciated it. Had she... liked it? It seemed so, and the look that she gave him made Aspenpaw feel a little warmer. Her remaining eye really was the most beautiful shade of blue. Aspenpaw had learned to appreciate the "little things" in life, and it was the "little things" that he could see. Her laugh. Her smile. That one remaining eye.

And no, Aspenpaw did not develop feelings overnight, but he could definitely admire those little things. They added up. The tom wondered why, with all the beautiful small things about Moonpaw that made her who she was, why everyone couldn't help but stare at that ravaged part of her face? It was true that it might not be "beautiful." Or "perfect." But Aspenpaw could already get a sense of who she was, and the untouched parts of her were attractive. It was impossible to deny that.

"Oh, uh, well... you're welcome."

He gave her a bright smile, glad she appreciated his compliment. Do you feel beautiful? That might be too personal to ask on a first meeting like this, but he would ask it eventually. "Tawnypaw's a genius, then," Aspenpaw laughed. He had never had to go out into the territory with warrior escorts, but he was pretty sure that they were determined to do their job. And who knew if Blazingstar himself would go with Moonpaw? From what he knew about the ginger leader, he knew that the tom tried his best to take good care of his Clan. Not to mention with the recent stress and drama of ThunderClan, he was probably going to be more cautious over letting apprentices out into the territory. At least... with Moonpaw. With current events, he guessed that Blazingstar would be protective over the apprentice.

A frown came over his features and he looked down at the ground for a moment, trying to work up the confidence that she wouldn't be hurt or upset by his question. "I... know this is probably a personal question, and don't feel like I have to have an answer, but I was thinking about this earlier and... how do you stay so cheerful? After what happened, you know, there are a lot of cats who would just kind of give up, but you - are different." She was different. She was special. And Aspenpaw hoped that she knew that.

[Mango]

Originally Posted by Gusty

(Lol yea I'll post in the DS today or tmrw)

The tortoiseshell she-cat chuckled for a moment. "Yeah." She agreed. Talking about the weather is underrated here in WindClan. Her pelt was ruffled slightly by the soft wind that rushed by.

"Anyways, is life good with you? Do you maybe want to... ah, do something, like hunt or patrol the border? It can't hurt to do a little extra for our clan." She said rather absentmindedly. In the back of her thoughts was this memory: moons ago, she had saved two kits who had lost their mother from a wildfire that swept through the area. (If I remember correctly, there was a wc fire during the evil era) Since then, Breezycloud had attempted to do more altruistic activities for the good of others around her.

(SO SORRY FOR A LATE RESPONCE YESTERDAY WAS CRAZY)
She smiled," Yes, life's good.Sure.I'd love to." She purred (sorry it's short)

[Brooklyn Trees]

Originally Posted by Lonestar23

Maybe the only thing that hurt more then having her deny he meant any of it was hearing her say that it hurt her too. Couragepaw remembered wanting to protect Moonpaw from hurt. Was he just... causing more of it? The tom looked down at the ground, his eyes flickering with pain as he wondered what he was supposed to do next. Where did you go from here? There was so much that he could have said, so much that he could have protected her from, but instead he was silent. His paws were fidgety, and his eyes flitted around nervously as though he wasn't quite sure what to say or do now. Because where... where on earth... were you supposed to go from here? It seemed he had reached yet another crossroads. He could leave her alone and stay safe from the pain of standing there and seeing her, but knowing that they couldn't be together - or he could stay and fight for her again. It seemed he was fighting against her and for her at the same time. He knew she couldn't really think that he was lying. So whatever this denial was, Couragepaw was pretty sure that he hadn't had that much to do with it.

"Moonpaw, I - why... why do you think I would lie to you? Wh - why is that even a, a possiblity in your mind?"

His voice was growing somewhat frustrated. Did she really believe that he would lie to her? Just like that? He was growing frustrated, and he knew it. So Couragepaw stopped. His stance became less agitated, and the fire left his eyes. "Sorry. I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that." There had to be something that he could say that wasn't dangerous, wouldn't hurt her more, but would get his point across. How could she even begin to believe that he would ever, ever lie to her? However that worked, he was hurt by it. It just didn't make sense. It just didn't. And he was afraid of it. Afraid that maybe, this was a foreshadowing of what their future would be like anyways. With neither one trusting the other, and lies, and- no. This wasn't her. This wasn't his Moonpaw, this wasn't his best friend. It couldn't be. Before, she had trusted him. It had all started so stupidly that Couragepaw was still blaming himself. How could he have been so completely idiotic? Whatever he had thought when he had told her about Fernpaw, now it was still casting shadows on the future. Hopefully it would still be their future. Someday... somehow.

His tone was like sharp glass to her and she felt his words cut deeply into her soul. Moonpaw visibly flinched. This was not right, how could it be? Growing up she had always believed that they would be together – as close friends or family – for all of their days. But that possibility seemed to now have fallen from the face of even imagined hopes for the future.
Moonpaw's grey eyes turned darker – not with anger. Not this time. Now her eyes were dark with a subtle pain and the beginnings of a colder desperation.

As Moonpaw began to speak she could feel that her voice was somewhat steely, though also quiet. She knew that she sounded subtly afraid; for this she was not pleased. Not that any of this certain situation was pleasing to her; that is, not beyond the knowledge that he had not lied to her. Though even this knowledge was not without pain. Sounding afraid made her feel weak. She wanted to be rescued by Couragepaw from this, but in a much stronger way she could never bear to have been rescued by anyone but herself.

"Because..." She paused, and then began again.
"Because I knew that I was not good at hiding how I felt; despite my efforts to do so it still seemed so obvious that I... Everyone changes in some way as they grow. I was afraid that you had seen this spot of weakness in me and had decided to use it to... Somehow it seemed to make sense. It doesn't any more, how could it? I caused this between us and now I don't know how to fix it.
"If I had only been less stupid like my regular Over-thinking over-protective self than maybe we would by now be... I'm sorry..."
she was fumbling with words, air and tone dropping into uncertainty and regret.
She had hurt Couragepaw, without any real reason. For that, she did not believe that she could easily forgive herself.