A Fox in the grass.

[Exis]

Foxblaze sprinted around the clearing, frantically looking for her boy. Snakepaw... oh how much she had missed. She missed him so.

@Rani

[Rani]

Snakepaw was hunched over in a patch of sun when his mother returned, drying out some herbs he was worried were getting to wet and so might rot with a bored expression on his face. So when he heard a cat burst into the clearing not even knowing who it was he turned to look curious and hopeful it was at least something to help with his boredom. What he saw surpasses all expectations or even his dreams.
"Mom?...... MOM!" The apprentice abandoned his herb duties scrambling against the ground in a mad dash to get to Foxblaze faster "Mom! Mom! Mom! Your back, your ok! I thought something happened, I thought- Youre ok!" Reaching an end to his charge Snakepaw immediately dove into the mollies soft side abandoning his usual tough cover and trying to burrow into Foxblazes fur, a shakey happy purr threatening to shake his entire body. It was strange what you noticed in the moment but beyond the joy at seeing his mother again he couldnt help but reflect that she wasnt as big as he remembered, or maybe he was just bigger.
@Exis

[Exis]

Foxblaze wrapped her paws around her dearest baby. “Oh how I missed you! How are you Snakepaw? Snakepaw. Oh my baby is on his way to becoming a warrior!!!! I’m so excited for you!” Foxblaze exclaimed. She smiled happily as her baby boy snuggled into her. Oh how much she’d missed, he was getting so much bigger. Soon he’d be bigger than her.
@Rani

[Rani]

Foxblaze thought he was.... The quiet reminder of how much his mother missed and the reality of how his life was choked his purr in his throat until the noise was entirely gone. He, he didnt have the heart to tell her. It wasnt like she'd be upset about his position, Snakepaw knew his mother, but he was still upset about his position. And when Foxblaze found out about what'd happened after that.... The young tom was fully aware that Dogflame was close to his mom, and Snakepaw was the one who failed to save him. Failed to help him fend off the fox, failed to stop the bleeding, failed to heal him like he was supposed to; what would his mother think of that. Even beyond Dogflame he also was unable to save Owlflight and Mapleleaf, there wasn't yet a single one of his clanmates that was his responsibility that had not ended up dead.
Snakepaw didn't say a word only shrinking a bit and burrowing his head further into Foxblaze's belly fur to avoid looking her in the eye, he didn't think he could keep everything surpassed if he did. Still he was... happy, so so happy to be reunited again tail curling around her so she couldn't go. The young tom had learned how fragile life was firsthand now and while he would never admit it he worried his mother had gone alone in the territory never to return home.
@Exis

[Exis]

Foxblaze wanted her boys reaction and sigh. What had happened. “Why don’t you your me around while you tell me what’s been bugging ya? I can tell you aren’t so happy and that something is off. You shouldn’t try and hide things from your momma, it won’t work.” she mewed giving him a lick on the head before standing up. It hurt her to leave him but she needed him to get up and start moving. She should have been here for him. She wasn’t but she was now.

@Rani

[Rani]

Snakepaw grumbled into her side but heaved a sigh and got up. She was right there was no keeping her in the dark, especially given it was impossible to hide the herb scent from his pelt anyway. He gestured her over to join him in the sun with his drying herbs and decided he'd get this outta the way one revelation at a time. "So I was apprenticed and assigned to Eagleflower, which was great for awhile! but next meeting Lionstar decided that wasnt right and... Well he assigned me to Sparrowskip which was a huge shock cuz he made Sparrowskip medicine cat. So what Im trying to say is Im medicine cat apprentice now." The apprentice awkwardly explained sweeping a paw over his herbs and settling in to wait for his moms reaction. Sure he wasn't really happy about it (though the sting of the action had by now faded greatly) but he wouldnt begrudge his mom the excitement over it, this was huge and having her approval and pride would go far to ease the last lingering aches of the reassignment. Moms opinion mattered most afterall and if she was happy and proud of him he had to be doing the right thing, despite his doubts.

@Exis

[Exis]

Foxblaze stepped back and looked over her son. “Oh great Starclan!” She exclaimed wide eyed and absolutely dumbfounded. “My boy. My sweetest boy is going to be a medicine cat.” She mewed a bit shocked.

This was... this was... AMAZING!! She quickly regained herself and rushed over to hug Snakepaw. “Oh my Starvlan my boy is going to be a medicine cat!” She was far too excited for her own good at this exact moment. “My little snake in the grass is going to be so important! Oh I’m so very very proud of you!” She just couldn’t stop squeezing her baby.
@Rani

[Rani]

Snakepaw let out a little hiss as his mother squeezed him squirming lightly though he was more protesting being strangled than trying to escaping Foxblazes hold. Maybe it was years of being a warrior but his mother was oddly strong. "Yeah it took a bit to get used to but Im starting to get used to it. I- I really struggled at first though. I always wanted to be a warrior like you and Sootstar and it hurt cuz Lionstorm didnt even give me a choice and I hated it it was so sudden I had no idea why or how he just did it! No one was there and no one cared that I didnt want it they all just called me childish and no one was there no one cared how I felt. I- I just." The skinny cats words grew more panicky and choked as he talked trying not to let the tears well in his eyes, burying his face in his mothers thick fur. He tried, he tried so hard not to blame her, not to blame his mother for being gone when he needed her most but deep in the dark bitter part of himself that housed his irrational hate for Sparrowskip he felt it, the crawling resentment for his own mother. "I've come to grips with it now but for so long... It hurt." He calmed again, falling into the emotional rut he'd well developed by now. At some point you just reached the end of sorrow and could only find calm acceptance. And he had, he had accepted this but Foxblaze needed to know that too.

"It hurt because I wanted to help my clan and couldnt do it as a medicine cat. Mom we knew nothing, we still know nothing. Not one herb how to fix infection or poisoning or take away pain or anything. We could just watch. I want to tell someone but I dont want you to know, I dont know what you'll think of me when you hear how I failed...
I get now what Lionstorm and Sootstar were saying when I was made medicine cat apprentice though, Im needed here even if Im not a perfect fit or I didnt really want it. Sparrowskip is too weakhearted to do what sometimes needs to be done even if he's better with the clan. Im not though, I've always been strong. You know that though." The young tom breathed deep and smiled ruefully "Sorry I didnt wanna take away from you excitement thats just been building for awhile. I am happy to be where I am I think and Im still getting the warrior knowledge I wanted somewhat too. So Im content and where I need to be, cant really throw a tantrum like a baby about it forever." He gave a hissy chuckle leaning into his mom.

Like washing out a cut, it hurt, but he could be better now.
@Exis

[Exis]

Foxblaze smiled on the outside and rued to absolutely smackdown the cats that made her baby feel in such a way. She gave him a lick on the head and kept her warm smile. “So Fawnsqueak isn’t helping? Why not ask to venture to another clan to ask for some tips? It’s part of your privilege to do so.” She mewed thoughtfully. It would be a good place to start for him. He couldn’t go on without the knowledge.
@Rani

[Rani]

The question netted a scoff. “I didn’t even see Fawnsqueak at the ceremony. I don’t know what he’s doing but he might as well be a ghost right now so were not going to be getting help from within the clan. As for the other idea… Well windclan would take us, they owe us for Coldamber, we fostered their own medicine cat and we’ve got good relations besides and thunderclan are friendly right now so they may take us, issue is their medicine cat Frostbreeze is a nut job from what Ive seen from her in meetings, but… I don’t know, I think Sootstar is scared to send either of us with his leadership still being so new and the lack of deputy. I don’t see why one of us cant go at least, not like Im doing anything and though we know about the same Sparrowskip is the full medicine cat, but it's not my call.” Snakepaw shrugs “Sure running off and doing it anyway is always and option, not like he can admit I bolted to the other clans without appearing like he can’t control me” the young tom full on snickers here, he may respect the leader and actually listen to his scolding but the lanky apprentice just could not care about orders anymore really “but I don’t feel good about it. I can’t just abandon my clan.”

He shakes himself out of the heavy topic with a small hiss “Ugh look at me Im talking like an old person. Mom Im talking like an elder, save me I need something cool and interesting to talk about! What happened to you while you were gone? Was it interesting? Were…” He shouldn’t ask, but… “Were you off seeing my father?” He whispered. It’s not like Snakepaw particularly cared about Greyclaw but maybe Mom still did. Its not like he really had a clue anyway.

@Exis (out of chara I brought up the idea and really didn’t get a yes or no, Im letting it sit before I ask again)